The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

liloandstitch

chickpea wrote: »

Hello!

Cd8. Computer says no. We DTD earlier anyway - trying to let DH feel less like an unpaid sperm donor. And, as he romantically put it, he needed to get the ailing and crippled out his system before this month's campaign begins in earnest.

OV is anytime between CD16 and 20, so real start date prob CD13 or 14. This month's plan is every other day then carpet bombing circa OV day.

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At least I'm back on the straight and narrow regarding diet and alcohol, been model of virtue so far this month. After last month's little bender. My thinking last month was that doing everything right hadn't helped, so maybe doing everything wrong would. It didn't.

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I had my DH's aunt stay last night. I didn't want to give the TTC game away or put any thoughts of anything similar in her head, so I made us both G&Ts, hers heavy on the gin, and mine with barely a drop in it. Only, somehow I managed to mix up the glasses. Wowza, that was a strong one I poured for her. Then later, she caught me in the act of adulterating her glass with more gin. She didn't say anything, so not sure what she thought of that one.

Good luck everyone this month. In the words of Gabrielle, Dreams can come true..!

I love this post :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Cant stay long, still wearing out DH ........................

Lilo

ginvzt

Hello all! Haven't been able to post for a while, but congratulations to jiblets and plumpmouse!

Nothing new here. I am still away, but hopefully it is the last week. We have our appointment with the clinic in 3 weeks time, by when I need to 4.5 kg "lighter", so it is going to be a challenge living in hotel for another week. But I will do my best! The thing is, my consultant at local hospital said BMI needs to be 30, but the clinic said if BMI is above 29, then PCT would not pay for the treatment. Not sure if they meant my PCT including (hospital is in Liverpool, and I am from nearer to Preston), but I am not willing to 'test the waters' just to be told to go away and lose some more...

I had a dreadful dream tonight, that about an hour before appointment my OH called me and said that there is no way he is going to make the appointment (in that way of can't be bothered), and we had to reschedule it for December 9th... Ok, it was only a dream, and I know that OH wants children just as much if not more than me, but I hope all goes well.

On a different topic, has anyone read "Making babies the hard way"? I saw it Waterstones two weeks ago, and can't stop thinking about it. We went back to Waterstones this weekend again, so I sat down and read the first few pages. It is about a couple's experience of going through the treatment and dealing with it all. I feel I want to read it. Just to get a glimpse of what others a feeling and that it is not just us that have to go through it all. I know, everyone's experiences and problems are different, but it is good to know that you are not going crazy... Ok, the book starts with the man being told that he has no sperm, our situation is different and we are both fine according to all the tests done so far, but we still can't conceive a child.

Sorry for the speech, but if anyone read the book, I would like to know what you think - is it something worth reading? Or can you suggest something else similar? I thin it would help me to prepare for the upcoming treatment, especially mentally.

toniq

Hi Gin xx

I haven't read it, I think it would have me sobbing all the way through xxx

Really hope u can get the bmi sorted and relax and look forward to the treatment xxxx

VK-2008

i agree would prob be a fab read but very teary
mind you it might give us all here a wee but of inspiration and perspective

cedrickerry

apologies ...only popped in once in ages and now I'm here to rant ...but don't know how else to get it off my chest safely so hoping you ladies understand:(

DH had a dream this week where he was living with his stepdad cos I chucked him out 2 wks before IVF. Seemed impossible was what I told him ....but now I'm not so sure ..

His mum died at beginning of month and I've been using this as a reason for his behaviour recently ....but the longer it goes on, the worse it gets and now I think its more of an excuse than reason. He started smoking on and off since she died (after giving up in Feb so we got our IVF referral), he's been finding it hard to go out, so not been socialising (we went for a couple of drinks on Friday in places where he can hide), and gambling more (money has been an issue cos we have spent a lot of money travelling to his home town and funding food, carparking, and his gambling habit. Had an ok day yesterday so I thought it was improving - went out with dog, shopping (albeit in another town so he didn't see anyone) and a car boot sale. Were having a good chat in the evening over a couple of drinks ...then he just stopped and went to bed at 10 ( I think it was because he had no smokes) he was up at 630 this morning - saying he was cold, and then banging around to get clothes to warm up - enough to wake me up so much I could no longer sleep. I got up to make us breakfast - now he's gone back to bed (with just a glass of water!) and will probably sleep all day (although I have to go to a friends BBQ on my own this afternoon)

running out of patience, even looked at the financial situation last week to see if I could "survive" on my own. I do love him, I still want the IVF (if we ever hear back from PCT :mad:) but not sure I can carry on too much longer like this. perhaps I am unreasonable and it is all grief (he doesn't seem to realise I grieve too) and perhaps its the Clomid (but that's too easy to blame!) who knows .....

Really sorry for the rant ......:o

have a happy sunny Bank Holiday everyone!

QQuaver

cedrickerry, perhaps he needs to talk to someone who's been through losing a mother. Do you know someone or perhaps the GP could give you suggestions like counselling and support groups?
(((Hugs))).

ginvzt, good luck losing 4.5kg in 3 weeks, that a little over 1kg/week, so should be possible:)

As for the book, I've never read it. Don't know if I'd like to read it now though...

alamaya

Me again the distant lurker.
I had Egg Collection on Friday
Numbers were 14 eggs, 11 were mature and 6 fertilised.
Waiting on call today to see how they are going and i am going crazy with the waiting and this is before i even get to the 2WW.
I thought the hardest thing about IVF would be the injections and scans. Boy was i wrong its all this waiting.
xx

QQuaver

Alamaya, at least things are moving forward, when are they going to put the eggs back in?:)

alamaya

Had the call and all 6 are little embryos now but one is a very slow grower. Being taken to a Blastocyst so tranfer on wed

liloandstitch

Brilliant news alamaya, hope it goes well

Gin, watch Maybe Baby with Hugh Laurie - funny, but the writer (ben elton or someone similar) had been through it, and it is very real in places - Made me cry the first time I watched it

Lilo