The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

littleme82

Hi everyone - I am now 2 days late but am still holding out for testing. I know my cycle is messed up because of clomid so will test saturday when I am 4 days late (unless AF shows by then which I wont be surprised if it does).

As for you all turning 30 this happened to me last year. I really thought I would have a baby by the time I was 30. I am now 5 months off 32 and still never a hint of a TLP.

Oh well must think positive.

Hope all you ladies undergoing treatment are all coping x

Part_Mouse

Little me got my fingers crossed for you.

fluffnutter

This is beautiful - one guy's musings on his and his wife's struggles with having a baby. Hopefully it might be of comfort.

http://www.stevewiens.com/2013/03/26/ten-words-that-describe-infertility/

littleme82

Thanks Partmouse - sounds silly but I don't want to test because by not knowing there is still that little bit of hope isn't there.

I have to say though I am becoming rather obsessed with knicker watch!

x

tea_lover

fluffnutter wrote: »

This is beautiful - one guy's musings on his and his wife's struggles with having a baby. Hopefully it might be of comfort.

http://www.stevewiens.com/2013/03/26/ten-words-that-describe-infertility/

You know it's bad when you're no longer finding any comfort in random blogs.... they used to be guaranteed to cheer me up .

Now it just feels like all of these are written by people who've had their happy ending and so, inevitably, have a completely different perspective on whether the years of struggle were worthwhile. Where are the blogs by people who've been trying for years, who it never happened for and who ended up bitter and unhappy? Is it honestly worth it if all you get at the end is a strained relationship, a ruined career from all the time off, a sense of isolation from all your friends who moved on with their lives and their children, and some sort of PTSD?

Gah... bad day.

Part_Mouse

Little me its so it silly at all holding out testing we all need hope.i really hope this cycle does it for you.

Fluff thanks for the link.

Tea hugs.

littleme82

I'm in tears. I hate my stupid body. The witch is on her way. Cycle 13 failed. Clomid x 3 cycles failed. I'm just one big failure. DP is out so he doesn't even know yet. I really thought being late it was our time.

fluffnutter

tea_lover wrote: »

You know it's bad when you're no longer finding any comfort in random blogs.... they used to be guaranteed to cheer me up .

Now it just feels like all of these are written by people who've had their happy ending and so, inevitably, have a completely different perspective on whether the years of struggle were worthwhile. Where are the blogs by people who've been trying for years, who it never happened for and who ended up bitter and unhappy? Is it honestly worth it if all you get at the end is a strained relationship, a ruined career from all the time off, a sense of isolation from all your friends who moved on with their lives and their children, and some sort of PTSD?

Gah... bad day.

Yeah, I guess they're more of a comfort once you've got your own happy ending. I hope I didn't upset you. Anything I say will sound trite but I know. I do know.

MrsDavo

LittleMe, I am so sorry to here AF arrived :-(. Sending you a huge hug.

Fluffnutter - than k you for the link - I did enjoy reading it.

Tea - I get that! I would like to read how people learnt to move on with their lives after never becoming parents? Because I believe that there is a chance my OH and I will never have a child together. I may only be 25 and have loads of time as people keep telling me but I need to know how to move on and enjoy life instead of just going day to day.

Happy Birthday for tomorrow Partmouse xxx

fluffnutter

From my experience - explore lesser talked about options. If your attempts at IVF fail, it's not necessarily the end of the road for you carrying your own child. I know I bang on a bit, but donation is another weapon in your infertility arsenal. My eggs are useless but thanks to someone somewhere, I had a baby. I don't hear enough about it as an option. I hear of women trying IVF, which fails, then thinking there's nothing else to try. Fact is, the quality of the embryo is the most important thing in determining a healthy pregnancy, and for that you need good eggs. Donors have the best eggs imaginable. It's something to think about, perhaps.