MONEY MORAL DILEMMA. Should Napoleon wait till after the holiday to ditch Josephine?

GoldenCow

Oooooh just go away, enjoy ur holiday and you never know she mite not be that bad after all lol.

It could be a make or break holiday and she'll b lookin forward to it. If she was dumped just before a holiday she was lookin forward to that would be even worse

:rolleyes:

mcchell

Break up before.

I was on holiday a couple of years ago and there was a woman crying down the phone in the corridor outside our room because her boyfriend has split up with her whilst they were away, highly annoying for us having her crying away and obviously upsetting for her, I think she planned to fly back by herself obviously not ideal situation.

danielley

I think Napoleon should tell her before and give Josephine the chance to find someone else to go with in his place and not expect any money in return!

Then she can use the holiday to get over the break up and come back refreshed, tanned and relaxed. Then Napoleon will probably want her back ha

Augustus_the_Strong

It's a simple financial calculation - would Napoleon think it's worth paying £900 to get rid of his girlfriend? (just for her to leave, I don't mean taking out a contract!) If not, stick with what he's got and go on the holiday together. With a bit of luck, she might find someone more interesting and do the dirty on him instead, thus assuaging his non-existent guilt.

sofasoph

It depends if he is sure things won't go wrong during the holiday - if they're not arguing, then it seems like they don't have a problem getting along and hopefully things would be fine. If Napoleon thought there was any possibility of not being able to get through the holiday without saying anything, however, then he shouldn't go on holiday as being broken up with whilst actually on holiday and with nowhere to escape to/no friends around is surely worse.
If Napoleon thinks it will be fine though, he should go on the holiday - he should be considering her input to the holiday as well as she surely wouldn't want to lose the money either. Its bad enough being dumped without also losing out on money/holiday and the stress that goes with that.
I've been in a vaguely similar situation, although the trip was just to London and the expense about £250. I was the one doing the breaking up - not because of particular problems/arguments but because I just didn't feel the same way anymore. I broke up with him and didn't go away, but I had booked everything (he was going to pay me back half) so didn't feel too bad - at least I was the one losing out. If he had booked/paid for things, I would have perhaps gone through with the trip as I wouldn't have wanted him to lose money because of my selfishness/bad timing.
Talking of timing, if there are no arguments etc, then Napoleon doesn't need to crush Josephine by breaking up with her immediately following the holiday. If he feels able to go on holiday with her, then he can probably stay with her for at least another couple of weeks rather than making it obvious that he went on holiday just so he didn't lose money, and thus hurting her even more.

JazzySheep

I know someone this happened to. They were half way through the holiday when he couldn't contain it and splurged it out. They weren't arguing either and as far as she knew they were happy together. She was shocked and then became really angry and the argument and crying started.

Ruined the entire holiday for both of them and he even tried making up with her at the end but by that time she knew it was just to keep her from telling him what she thought of him.

He should be honest as quickly as possible so they both have a chance to
recoup their money and get on with their separate lives.

taking_the_big_step

Tell the truth. She might be feeling the same and also not wanting to lose the money, and if not, then they could work together to find someone who would go with either of them. a small charge will often allow a change of name.

wonder how he will deal with the other aspects of a romantic holiday setting or will he justify that bit too.

Wouldn't want to be him if he did - worrying about £900 would be the least of his worries if he goes on holiday and enjoys all the other benefits of being on holiday with a woman who doesn't realise that she's getting dumped when he gets back.

Stardust

Been here, its a nasty thing to do.

Get it over with before and then they have two weeks to make a decision on what to do (go as friends / one not go)

haveiwon

Tell her now, sell the holiday and give her half the proceeds towards anything she'd like to buy. Buy her a huge bunch of flowers and go on your way.

leeparsons

slackboy wrote: »

Act like a gentleman - tell her now and give her the option of taking someone else with her instead.
If he's decided to split up but is just debating timing she's already an "ex." Why bother with the pretence.

LOL, u can do that! For onething your telling the guy to give up 900quid (I've done that, when my ex played me for a fool, for couple months after our holiday away).
Secondly, if you know anything about holidays and flights. You know it would be probably be to late to change the tickets. As the name would not be corrected intime, with correlation to your passport.