Teens keeping their room clean

michelefauk

my eldest DD who is now 17 is the same, her room is disgusting. I used to try and leave it for as long as i could but would always crack and go in and blitz it, only for it to be back to being a state by night time.
Now I just leave it alone. i go in to open the window and put her clean clothes in there, but that usually ends up mixed up with dirty stuff and wet towels on the floor, again I just leave it although it nearly kills me to do so as i am a very tidy person. Every so often she announces she has "tidied her room", what she means is that she has put her dirty clothes in the wash, brought her dirty cups and plates down and dragged the quilt across the bed instead of the floor. Everything else would have been shoved under the bed or in the cupboards. She does this about once a week.
My advice is save your battles, if she wants to live like a pig that is up to her! I keep the door firmly shut at all times! Even my 4 yr old daughter won't go in there!

bestpud

Glen0000 wrote: »

To be honest though sometimes we feel like we are fighting a losing battle and it is embarrasing when people visit and make remarks.

Who do you mean by 'people'?

I'd tell her she can live in a mess if she likes but she must keep the door closed.

DD1 is 17 and she cleans hers about once a fortnight, and in between it gets very messy, even by my standards (I'm no domestic goddess! :rolleyes:)

However, I pretty much let her get on with it tbh, unless the boiler is due a service, or needs repairing, because it is in her room! If that is the case, I tell her to get it sorted sharpish and she does.

She has done her own washing, including her bedding, since she was about 14 so I don't interfere with that at all. I do go in and open the window sometimes, and I get round her if she has dirty crockery in there, because that is a hygiene issue to my mind.

DD(7) is getting better with hers and tends to tidy as she goes most of the time. If it starts getting out of hand, I get her in there and supervise her while she cleans up. I do this because it is a very small room and her toys get stood on and broken if left lying around. I vacuum in there too, when I do my room.

That's what I do, but essentially it is up to you what you do in your home and your mother needs to butt out imo.

It's hard letting go if you are quite tidy yourself but once you have done it, you will feel less stressed as there is nothing worse than locking heads with a teen!

dizziblonde

My mother used to leave me be until it got too bad (or she ran out of crockery as it was all in my room) and then threaten to black sack anything on the floor. I'm tidy now, apart from putting clean clothes away which I'm still rubbish at.

My younger brother though was just odd... spotless bedroom, would make sure he was in bed by 9.30, got up at 8 on a Sunday morning to do his homework without being prompted.... not a normal teenager! Now he's the laid back scruffy one and I'm the sensible responsible, relatively tidy (I get thwarted by oh and a cat whose major hobby in life is shedding fur) one.

piratess

I am so glad its not only my teen! shes 15 and is a complete nightmare! .................
her room looks like somone had been in there and squatted for months i refuse to anything in there anymore, i just shut the door! i wash their clothes and put them on the bed and leave them! i just refuse to get myself stressed over it anymore i dont have to live in it

mspig

My 12 year old cleans his own bedroom - though i do go in there during the day to make sure hes not left anything like school uniform screwed up at the end of his bed instead of in the wash. He hoovers his room once a week, though i do still change his bed, he takes the dirty sheets off and i put the clean ones on. Like someone said above, my mother can't understand why i don't iron bedding, PJs or underware, though she has stopped short of calling me lazy.
My parents don't even go up the stairs when they visit, but i would say something if they were going into the bedrooms as in my view bedrooms are your private place and not for visitors to be entering.

jenhug

if I had a friend into my room, I had to scrape a hole through all the rubbish on the floor so there was enough room for them to get in!
My parents let me get on with it. No big deal at all!
Your mum has issues!

badkitti

I remember my room being distinctly tidier and hoovered every week when there was a boyfriend visiting regularly

DianneB

I have my last 'baby' at home (14 years old) and we compromise, I generally change the linen and vacuum she has to put away "junk" and if the room is a total wreck she isn't allowed friends round. I have never ever allowed food and drink in the bedrooms (apart from a glass of water) so dishes aren't a problem. She does have two lovely white rats in there at the moment :eek::eek::eek: as we are rat sitting for a friend and have to keep them away from our patterdale terrier but normally the rule is no animals in there either apart from the morning wake up cuddle from dog!! If dirty clothes aren't brought down they don't get washed so she has 'nothing' to wear (apart from two chest of drawers and a wardrobe full!!).

Of my four boys who have left home two are total clean freaks and the other two a bit more relaxed so it seems to have worked okay!!

VeganClaire

My sister's bedroom used to get disguesting and my Mum worried about flies, mice etc. After many failed attempts to help her get and keep her room nice my Mum would clean it for her about once every two months. She would charge my sister £6 an hour for this! It made her at least attempt to keep it cleaner.

She needs to learn to take responsability for her own room. Maybe chat to her about it - perhaps offer to help her get it tidy if its really bad and from then she has to do it herself - or an insentive to keep it nice (like new sheets or some cushions) if she keeps it clean for a set amount of time.

Good luck!

rumncoke

The majority of teenagers are all alike. My DS is 18 & his room is a permanent tip, clean clothes in a basket on the floor, dirty ones scattered everywhere. Papers & books all over the floor. I used to nag all the time but eventually gave up as it was a waste of time. Last time it was properly clean & tidy was when his girlfriend came to stay at Christmas.
As long as the mess remains behind closed door I am happy. His washing only gets done if it is put in the basket in the bathroom, I will give him clean bedding but it is up to him to put it on.
He will have to have a huge sort out soon tho as he is off to uni in September. Dread to think what his room will be like there. Once he has gone I will be completely gutting the room, so at least for a while it will be fit to be seen.

Trouble is DD is just about to hit her teens & she has started getting messy now. Oh well only another 6 years til she goes to uni!