Today is a new day!

InaPickle

Hey PaF,

I don't have anything to say that the others haven't already, but know that I'm thinking of you as well. It sucks when things are tight. And it's OK to feel rubbish sometimes...you are human and it's only natural that you should feel the bad as well as the good.

Best of luck and I'm watching always. x

moo2moo

If money is tight and preying on your mind and you have balances on credit cards to clear why oh why are you overpaying your mortgage? Surely you'd be better off (and mentally more confident) if you cleared all your debts and had access to the equivalent to a months money in an instant access savings account so that when things reach crisis point you have 31 days breathing space.

You're piling far too much pressure on yourself unnescessarily.

Theres no way that in the same post you should be worrying about outstanding credit cards and overpaying the mortgage.

That £400 overpayment is your years gym membership and more. You're penalising yourself all the time and you have to stop it (or I'll slap you across the face with a wet kipper young lady!) You work hard and you deserve something for you as a reward for that.

If you don't have gym membership or Sliming World whats left to make life special for you? (apart from DD because as adorable as children are even the more saintly parents need an hour or too out once in a while).

You are doing fabulously! But all work and no play makes life miserable for Lou.

POSITIVE_AND_FOCUSED

Wow!
Thank you all so much for your comments. Moo Moo, youve got me wrong. Didn't mean to mislead. Im not over paying on my mortgage or sec loans, just that I keep an update on how much Im paying off after interest. It just makes me feel Im getting somewhere. My mortgage repayments will decrease by £150 in Sept when the fixed rate finishes - assuming rates dont go up.

KM - I do truely hear what you say, and Ive found a place that will help me if Im prepared to take that step. It may well come, however I see other diaries on here, inspirational stories all around, and I do not want to give up ..yet! Im hanging in there and that means everything to me. My dd has even started to quote me, where theres a will theres a way and all that. Dont give up Mummy, we will be ok and similar!

Today, the way Im looking at things is this. Im 45 next month. I will be clear of all credit card debt by the time Im 50. The reason things are tight is that Im simply not using credit cards to get me through the month so my debt is reducing albeit slowly. I intend to keep my mortgage payts ticking along, and can obviously overpay as more money is freed up from the credit card debt when Im 50 so it would be nice to think I will be mortgage free not long after that!

Now, this is all based on my work staying as it is, however I have big dreams for my business that I want to make a reality. My newsletter is going down really well with customers, Im speaking to one about joining my team tom. The sales are good. Scheduled to do about £900 sales this week. I know it will be slow progress, but even so its progress.

Interestingly, Ive heard nothing back from the websites Ive emailed that are supposed to support businesses and disabled people in business. Perhaps they've closed down aswell. I cant remember if Ive said but I emailed one, it turned out that they had closed down, and a lady kindly emailed me back to tell me, gave me someone else to contact, and theres been nothing. So, Im going to stick to my gut feeling and just do what I can. learn and write down whats working for me and see where that leads!

So, progress today. Ive reduced my mob phone bill, Ive cancelled a couple of dds no longer necessary. We can cope without them! Ive updated my childcare requirements to tax credits so thats all upstraight. I think they are underpaying me working tax credit because I think my net income will be less than projected. However, Ive kept it as it is until I know my actual net figure so that I am not putting myself in the position of owing tax credits anything.

DD and I are home for a time, going to the auction house in an hour or so, then we have deliveries this eve. All bills are covered for the next week, namely 3 dds in particular.

KM, please know I am seriously thinking of going for money advice and a repayment plan, however something inside ofme just says hang on in there a bit longer. I keep reminding myself the winter with the ongoing snow has been the most draining thing, its been a positive in that its inspiring me to get back into my team building in a bigger way, the summer will be much better, it will improve during the next 3 months, I cant think otherwise at this time. I want to be in a positive position by Sept to be able to work more flexibly next winter. Give myself more options. And of course my mortgage could be reducing if rates stay as they are!

I do not want to give up just yet. I have a lot more fight in me yet.. I think!! To think I am still upstraight with bills - again - despite everything is simply a miracle. An angel is looking after dd and me!

InaPickle

Hey PaF!

Nice to see that you are feeling more positive and that things are looking a bit straighter. However, I kind of agree with moo2moo: you put yourself under immense pressure sometimes. I mean, I can see how you want to feel that your mortgage is coming down, but perhaps you need to tell yourself to mentally 'forget' about it for the meantime and say to yourself that you only have £34,566.36 to deal with (which is your main priority). That would seem more manageable to me.

Keeping_Motivated

PAF you will make the decision IF and when you need to, you are a strong sensible woman who wants to do the right thing so you will. The main thing is you have researched your options and if you need to take that route you will do it wisely.

If your wish is to do it this way I truly hope you continue with the progress you are at the moment, you really deserve to get straight and have a bit of mental and physical peace x

Would it help to post your SOA on your thread (I can't remember if you have already) and include all the interest rates, just to double check if anyone can help you with any tweaking/saving that can be made?

POSITIVE_AND_FOCUSED

Hi Km and others!

Thank you. I am wondering if I can keep going today. I am too embarrassed to put my SOA up for all to see. I feel I am doing all I can. I realise I have to get out of this "poor me" mentality. Im feeling it re the current financial situation, my disability, re my parents, my mum in particular who apparently has now gone OD because the transfer she made to cover the cost of my adaption has not gone through. I told her to stop telling me money is tight for them, these are parents who have worked hard all their lives, who I love dearly and who deserve to spend their money which ever way they wish to, but dont tell me you are poor mum. You have not 1, not 2 but 3 cars, you have bought a new bathroom, a new computer, a holiday, you're 70 th birthday party all in the last few weeks. Good for you mum, but not once have you ever helped me with any of my adaptions or requirements till now, you have watched me fall over and not appreciate the loss of income , you have watched me worry during this winter and not click in your head there would be a loss of income. Stop going on about the financial dire straits you are apparently in. Its not your fault Im the way I am, but its not mine either. If you and dad are apparently struggling and theres two of you, what about me, Im on my own. Thats what I feel. In truth I wish they had never contributed toward the adaption. I will be made to suffer for it from now on in. Its come up in nearly every meeting with mum since they helped out.

Then on the one hand I am seeing my debt go down, on the other things are so tight, I need an injection of cash, and I am really trusting that will come in the form of my picture sales, and some jewelry sales. Apparently, I will also get £200 for my old car however mum wants half of that back. Sounds dreadful, but Im wishing I had never told her about the possibility of that bonus. I might not get it as I had to make a claim when the car was broken into, but the garage are sure I will. I need some kind of head start so Im not chasing the wind. April/May/June are crucial months. If Im in no better position by the end of June I will have to seek proper advice. So KM, Im going to give it till June, then decide what to do from then.

I also still haven't fully utilised the potential of ebay. The procrastinating will stop this weekend. Sun, I plan to load two things on it, to get started. See how I go. And just still focus, focus, focus on my business.

Have just put another order through, am delivering an order later, am picking up more orders today in a mo. Its all on the go there. Seeing a customer today with a view to them joining my team. Thats positive. I need to be grateful for everything.

Nearly forgot. Last eve, did some deliveries, and one customer gave me an old purse she had found and she wanted to give it to my dd. In it was £1.50 of 5ps. Its those sort of lovely acts that keep me going. I have such lovely, lovely customers. She could have given that purse to anyone, but she wanted my dd to have it. Just how kind is that. I got in the car and cried, and thought to myself there has to be an angel looking after us saying it will all be ok. I may sound mad saying that but thats how I feel.

In a pickle, I hear what you say but my mortgage is the one thing that is ongoingly reducing, and it makes me feel all this is worth it to see it reducing. Since LBM, Ive paid off £6K just with my normal repayments and it makes me feel good.! Sorry Ive not popped into your diary lately. Will do so soon. Hope all is well.

Off I must go, end of lunch break, come on Lou, it will be ok, get that money earned...!!! Am hanging in there and that has to count for something.

thrifty_fifty

Sounds like you're having a bit of a tough time today. My mum is pretty much the same as yours.

She feels she has to check up on me, as if I'm some sort of lost cause. At the end of the day, I think they are doing it because they know they are not as strong as you. Do you have friends nearby? Sounds like you could do with an evening off, drop your child off with the grandparents and just have some time off. xx

beanielou

So sorry things are so tough
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but I dont think you will get the good condition bonus as you have had a claim

beanielou

Wear and tear
Over the course of your agreement, we know that your car will show some signs of use. We want you to enjoy using your car so your Motability car comes with a "fair wear and tear policy". This means that wear and tear in line with a three year old car or unavoidable minor damage caused by a wheelchair or other mobility aid will be accepted as general wear and tear. Such general wear does not need to be repaired before returning your car at the end of the contract. However, to keep costs low for all our customers, cars that are returned seriously damaged to a degree which may affect re-sale value will be subject to damage payments. Plus if you return your car in a good condition at the end of your lease and have not made any insurance claims you may be eligible for a £200 bonus.

POSITIVE_AND_FOCUSED

Thanks Beanie Lou. This is why I doubted it when the garage told me because I had read that in the small print, so I am not expecting it, it will be a nice surprise if so. I am focusing on what is within my control and anything else is a plus!