Hubby and I unemployed and now im Pregnant AND Depressed.. HELP!!

Queen_P_2

I really need your help... Im at my wits end..

Ive been on this site lots but been in the pregnancy sections... but its hit me today that hubby wont deal with this.. so i need to.

I had my last contract in November and have since failed to find another job, Hubby lost his job in January and not able to find another either.

Though he went for loads of interviews he kept being told he was overqualified.

For some time now, years even we have always dreamt and truly believed we were better off being our own bosses.. but when hubby has ideas he then stumbles as to where to go next... and now since we have no money he says no point thinking of anything as u need money. Im sorry to sound so naive but I dont think this is ever true. You need determination, motivation and to be pro-active.. much can be done without money.

My Doc has said im unfit to find another job at mo for at least 6 weeks, thereafter he will sign me off again.. My pregnancy will suffer with the stress im under.

I have many hosptial visits for which I need to be accompanied, I have nobody other than Hubby to come wth me, and now I am pregnant those appointments have doubled.. so we think its more important for him to either be working from home or have his own business, but how do u find a job from start who will let you work from home? you cant.

EDIT: Our SOA's are:

Monthly Incomings:
My salary - £0.00
Partners salary - £0.00
Benefits - £67

Total - £67

Yearly / Twice Yearly Outgoings:
Mortgage/Rent - £657 Ground Rent per 6 months,
Service Charge: £474 twice yearly
Council Tax - £1300 Twice Yearly

Monthly Outgoings:

Mortgage is £977 (on hold for 6 months as of March)
Gas - £39
Electric - £51.00
TV License - £10.99
Sky £21.00
Phone - £18.00
Food - £120
ADSL: £29.99
Car Insurance - £80.00
Car Finance: £395.00
MIP's (Maximum Investment Plan) - £500
Petrol - £100

Total: £1,365.97 without Mortgage

We are going to the JobCentre tomorrow as an appointment was booked weeks ago, I now wont be able to get jobseekers allowance as ive got a sick note not to be working.

I dont know what to do I really need help

oops_a_daisy

awww Queen P well done for posting here and you really have come to the right place. Its difficult to see a good future when everything is cloudy and looks bad. Can you post a Statement Of Affairs ( SOA ) on here - a good template cam be found here http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=107280
I do hope you feel better soon - you will get support here

I'mcomingbackasaman

You need to look into what benefits you could get, ie Council Tax benefit (as your on a low income) Housing Benefit (if you pay rent). Write to your debtors asking them if they will accept lower payments until your income increases and explain your circumstances as to why your asking them. Are any of your private insurances covering unemployment (ie. pay the bills for 12 months or more).
All that you can do is sit down and list your total income, tot up your outgoings, see which ones you can cancel if not essential, and make arrangements to pay the others if only at a minimal amount till you get back on top with things. Hope this helps.

Queen_P_2

oops_a_daisy wrote:

Can you post a Statement Of Affairs ( SOA ) on here

Thanks, ive added it to my first post, understood its clearer to see.

Oh boy now im in more tears than ever seeing it like that..

:sad:

Queen_P_2

I'mcomingbackasaman wrote:

Are any of your private insurances covering unemployment (ie. pay the bills for 12 months or more)

Already called them, they said they cant do anything to decrease payments, and they wouldnt advise we stop the installments as there are only 4 years left of the 10 year period. Cancelling them now would give us nothing in return.

tipsychick

Definitely cancel Sky. It's a waste of money anyway and you just can't afford it.

Can you downgrade on the car front as you're repayments are high?

Depending on car and circs., you seem to be spending a fair whack each month on car insurance. I think you could probably bring that down by shopping around.

Have a look at the OS boards for tips on bringing down your food budget. You're not spending loads but I think for two adults you can bring that down a bit each month.

Sorry - I'm not much good at this myself! There will be brilliant people along in a sec though I'm sure.

Hope you feel better soon. Try and enjoy your pregnancy - I'm sure you'll get it all sorted soon and be able to concentrate on the baby.

Good luck X X

PS What does OH do or what would he like to do? Is it something that doesn't require too much in the way of overheads if he were to start up by himself?

Anniek1969

Hi Queen P,

the most important thing right now is your health and the baby. I know it might seem like there's nowhere to turn but there are some things you can do. Firstly you can look at how to cut your outgoings. Your mortgage seems really expensive is there any way to cut that by maybe going for a new deal with a lower interest. Your gas and electric payments are a lot have you thought about changing supplier. I don't know what your MIP is so could you maybe have a look at that. Your car insurance is really big have you thought about changing your insurer, you could maybe save money on this if you shop about. If both of you are on jobseekers allowance can you not get any help with your mortgage?

When you take a step back and look at these things individually instead of as a whole it doesn't seem so daunting and you might be able to save some money by changing suppliers.

I know it's seems that there's no way out but there are plenty of people here who at one time felt the same(me included)but with the help and support of the people on these boards you will be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

If you ever need any advice or support you are definately in the right place, the people here are amazing and you will be able to find ways to cut costs that you would never have thought of. But first of all make sure you are getting all the benefits you are entitled to, you would be amazed at the amount of people who don't know what they're entitled to.

Again, try not to worry too much and think about the baby. Is it you'r first?

tipsychick

Hi again!

Had another look. Your ADSL (broadband thingy) is v. expensive. You can halve that without any trouble. Have a look at Martin's article to find out who is absolutely the cheapest but I'm with BT for half that a month. Unless you're downloading loads of music and stuff, it'll do fine.

Queen_P_2

Anniek1969 wrote:

Again, try not to worry too much and think about the baby. Is it you'r first?

Yes its our First. I so didnt expect to be feeling so down about it though as we really wanted a baby..

I just feel useless that Im ill and need support going to appointments etc which only my hubby can provide as none of the family know, those that do arent able to take the time off.

Queen_P_2

tipsychick wrote:

What does OH do or what would he like to do? Is it something that doesn't require too much in the way of overheads if he were to start up by himself?

He works in IT, doing desktop support (fixing machines) Not sure what can be done with that himself

Anniek1969

I've got 3 and every pregnancy was different, but my third had the most problems and that was ony 4 years ago so I know how hard it is but you must try and not let the financial problems affect you.Before you know it the pregnancy will be over and the baby will be here so please try and enjoy this special time that you have. Every minute you have with your newborn is so special and goes so quickly you really have to try and put everything else on the back burner. It will still be there when you've had the baby but try and sort out everything you can before the baby comes along like changing energy supplier and insurance provider these should be stress free and by doing this you'll be saving money and reducing the financial stress you are under. Have you spoke to someone from the DSS? You are entitled to a grant of about £500 when you are about 30 weeks(can't remember the exact details but it will be on their website) this will help with costs for pram, cot, clothes. Maybe make an appointment with the CAB and they will tell you exactly what you are entitled to.

Try not to get stessed out, you need to try and relax and stay calm for you and the baby.