How old before i can leave my kids on their own?

TIGs

black-saturn wrote:

Maybe the option would to be work less hours so that you can be there for your children when they need you?

I don't mean to be funny but i don't need you making me feel even more guilty about leaving my kids so i can go to work than i already do.

I would love to work less hours so i could be home for my children but as a single mum i need to work at least 16 hours a week to qualify for tax credits.
I'm lucky my job fits perfect round school i don't start work till half nine so can take kids to school and finish at three so am finished in time to pick them up. Its only school holidays i need childcare.

Spendless

busymumof3 wrote:

My eldest child is coming up for 11 but I have to say I would not leave him alone at home under any circumstances. He too hates shopping but tough luck he has to come. If he is off school sick, his sister still needs to get to nursery so he has to walk with us too. Sometimes the logistices of one car a family of five and Grandma to pick up or a friend to transport seems impossible but we just have to cope. I would simply just not take the risk of something happening for the sake of 1) Saving money or 2) Inconveniencing yourself or others a little.

Sorry, we are not talking about murders or abduction here, we are talking domestic accidents. How about friends who turn up unannounced or even by design and decide to take advantage. I can unfortunately think of tens of accidents that could happen. When that child is expected to look after a younger sibling it is even worse.

Do you work though busymumof3? I think what this thread is showing is how awkward it is for childcare when the kids feel they are 'too old' but they are still not totally old enough to be left alone.

I don't know why it was different years ago. I was left from about 12 looking after a sister 7 years younger than me for odd hours. I really didn't like it and don't think it should have been expected of me. My gran tells me her and her sister used to be sendt off with a packed lunch each Saturday into London, whilst their mum got on with chores. She doesn't think she can be have been any older than 12 at the time-her sister was 2 years younger.

Kimberley

TIGs wrote:

I don't mean to be funny but i don't need you making me feel even more guilty about leaving my kids so i can go to work than i already do.

I would love to work less hours so i could be home for my children but as a single mum i need to work at least 16 hours a week to qualify for tax credits.
I'm lucky my job fits perfect round school i don't start work till half nine so can take kids to school and finish at three so am finished in time to pick them up. Its only school holidays i need childcare.

Your doing a fine job, it is hard as a working single mum, thank god i only work in term time.

Spendless

TIGs- have you ever looked at www.childcarelink.gov.uk

BTW-Notice you are in Yorkshire. So am I. PM me if you wish to state where, just in case we're nearby and I know of any childcare places.

black-saturn

TIGs wrote:

I don't mean to be funny but i don't need you making me feel even more guilty about leaving my kids so i can go to work than i already do.

I would love to work less hours so i could be home for my children but as a single mum i need to work at least 16 hours a week to qualify for tax credits.
I'm lucky my job fits perfect round school i don't start work till half nine so can take kids to school and finish at three so am finished in time to pick them up. Its only school holidays i need childcare.

I'm a single mum too but I fit my work round my children. If anyone implied I had to leave my children on their own to go to work I would rather leave the job than the children. It's an unreasonable request for any boss to make.

Spendless

black-saturn wrote:

I'm a single mum too but I fit my work round my children. If anyone implied I had to leave my children on their own to go to work I would rather leave the job than the children. It's an unreasonable request for any boss to make.

. No one has asked her to do that. The original question was whether we thought the kids were old enough to be left as the kids were saying they were too old for the kids club.

As has already been said, if you are on tax credits you still need to work at least 16 hours a week in the school hols.

black-saturn

Spendless wrote:

. No one has asked her to do that. The original question was whether we thought the kids were old enough to be left as the kids were saying they were too old for the kids club.

As has already been said, if you are on tax credits you still need to work at least 16 hours a week in the school hols.

It was in a reply to a comment further up.

looby75

black-saturn wrote:

I'm a single mum too but I fit my work round my children. If anyone implied I had to leave my children on their own to go to work I would rather leave the job than the children. It's an unreasonable request for any boss to make.

As a single parent you are damned if you do and damned if you don't Go to work and someone (I'm not referring to anyone specifically here btw) will accuse you of neglecting your kids. Don't go to work and someone will accuse you of sponging off the state. Go to work but ask for flexible work hours to take care of your kids and someone will accuse you of being selfish and wanting things too much your own way

Doesn't matter what you do someone will have a objection to the way you live your life.....and the main one is usually just because you have "committed the crime" of being a lone parent!

busymumof3

HI Spendless

No I don't work and I haven't since my eldest was born. I didn't think that was particulary relevant though and I certainly didn't want to start off another very boring and predictable working parent V stay at home mum debate. Not interested in that. Everybody makes their own decisions based on their own circumstances and it's no one elses business.

My post was a general one and not directly in response to the opening one. Someone had mentioned leaving their child alone to go for a coffee and others to go shopping etc. I simply feel it is not acceptable under any circumstances at the kind of ages mentioned.

TIGs

black-saturn wrote:

I'm a single mum too but I fit my work round my children. If anyone implied I had to leave my children on their own to go to work I would rather leave the job than the children. It's an unreasonable request for any boss to make.

Then you are very lucky to be able to do that, i get 4 weeks holiday a year which i take during kids holidays the rest of the time it is up to me to find childcare for the kids thats why i pay a fortune for it, if she let me work to fit round my kids then she'd have to let everyone else do so too.

My boss has never implied that i have to leave my kids at home on their own and i can take time of to look after them but it would be without pay and after so many days off a year it goes to disiplinary. If it came to it i would leave my job to look after my kids my kids come first in every aspect of my life but jobs that fit round kids 100% are very hard to find. i think i'm lucky having a job that fits round school hours other mums aren't so lucky.