Ok whats the secret?

Pobby

Why do people want " things ", I find it sad. I have an old telly, does the business, Y reg car, love it and my wife has an S reg. Both required for work. We nearly went bust coming out of the last recession and is it to my eternal sadness that a couple of inheritances saved our bacon. We now live in a modest house with savings, my wife works very hard and I also have done for all our working life.

Having ones own business and chancing it all when interest rates were very high was not great for us, coupled with 4 firms going bust on us owing a great deal of money.


I am just grateful that I don`t hanker after all the trappings. Certainly I don`t do debt, and although, commision only, did well for a few years that really got us back on our feet when I had to close our old business down.

I will be retiring in a few years, and will be happy if we live our modest lives together. I have experimented with living within the means that our retirement income may provide , it`s very easy.

So many have been conned by the want it all culture. Humph, total ruibbish tat will lead to unhappiness.

Blackpool_Saver

Some people don't drink or smoke and don't waste money on going out, some prefer to make a nice home.....

Mrs_Ryan

We live in an expensive part of rural Leicestershire. Our combined income is about 35k (I only earn 13k basic but I get enhancements for unsociable hours which can push it up to knocking on for about 15k) We have a very small mortgage thanks to OH sweating blood to pay it off before he had a total psychiatric breakdown a few years ago.
People I work with are very envious of me - while they are struggling to pay huge mortgages, ours is ok and we have the odd treat - I've just come back from a weekend in London that cost me somewhere in the region of about £500, and I bought the D&G necklaces I've always dreamed of having last year. However, I had saved to go away and helped out my friend who had just been made redundant, and admittedly the necklaces were bought on credit (although paid off straight away - when I changed jobs I was saving over £200 a month on travel costs and that was my one big treat to myself)

OH has a season ticket for Leicester Tigers that he pays £350 a year for, and we spend somewhere in the region of 70-90 quid in Tescos every week.
To others it might seem that we are doing well. However, OH has mental health problems that could mean everything could come crashing down around us at any given minute, and I have to look after him as well as work full-time. I have a long-term illness that affects my life in a massive way which can wipe me out sometimes - sometimes my weekends away are a necessity.

We had to borrow the money to buy a new washing machine to replace our 11-year-old Hotpoint when it broke, and our new fridge that replaced our 11-year-old Zanussi was second-hand. Our TV is on its last legs, one of the dining room chairs collapsed under me yesterday and OH drives a Y-reg Yaris that although beautifully cared for, is getting on and needs work doing to it now. We are going on a £100 quid holiday to Cornwall this year as we couldnt afford the holiday to Ireland we wanted.

All I can say is that appearances can be deceptive!!!!!!!!

frenchconnection200

Toto wrote: »

I totally agree.

I am sick to death of hearing people bleating on about 'their taxes' paying for tax credits and so on. I have been a high rate tax payer for years and I don't begrudge a penny of it. I think it's great that children are being given a decent standard of living, poverty creates all sorts of misery, not just because people can't afford to feed or clothe their kids but because those kids often end up in a life of crime or poverty themselves.

So, it sometimes makes sense for one parent to stay at home or work part time, isn't that the best thing we can give the younger generations? A chance to spend their early years with mum or dad caring for them?

Do people honestly think that if there were no tax credits that taxes would go down? of course they wouldn't you'd be paying exactly the same. I tell you, I am happy to hand over my money every month knowing that some of it is going towards giving ordinary people a decent standard of living rather than lining the pockets of some greedy MP or being spent on some needless war.

I'm not disagreeing with you but I was brought up to believe you went to work to afford all the nice things, you only had as many children as you could afford and you didn't get into debt (ok so I failed on that one!!). My point, probably badly put, is that the system therefore is skewed when people know thay are better off not working and can afford to have lots of kids and holidays, big TV's etc. I'm fortunate to only have to work part time and I have a well paid job, I'm quite happy to contribute to those less well off than me, I'm not so happy whan people blatently tell me they can afford to have another baby and not work because my taxes will provide for them (and yes someone has actually said that to be recently).

I must say however we are all totally getting off the OP topic, me included, and things are getting a tad nasty.

Fire_Fox

There are a lot of envious eyes on this thread. I agree with those who say appearances are deceptive - many who appear to be doing well are robbing Peter to pay Paul, others just prioritise differently to you. You only have to read a few SoAs to realise that. For example, people from lower income households are far more likely to smoke than those who are better off.

I grew up in a four bedroom house in Surrey, both parents are teachers. We also had two vehicles and a foreign holiday every year. How? Half our garden was given over to chickens and fruit, we had an allotment for veg, a motorcaravan for holidays, neither parent smoked or drank much, a fair few second hand or homemade clothes, and we had a series of paying lodgers. :money:

Now at 36 I am on a low income, yet own my flat outright and effectively have no debts. How? I don't run a car, don't have a landline, don't go on holiday, don't smoke or go out much, take packed lunches, have one TV with Freeview, hardly turn the heating on ... :T Don't get me wrong I spend in areas others would consider to be quite wasteful.

So many things that were considered luxuries not so long ago are now 'essential'. I've lost track of the number of times someone has claimed their £60 a month Sky package (for example) is the family's only luxury when actually they all have mobile phones, an internet connection, one or more cars and are still using the central heating into May.

LabLover

I think if you refer to my earlier post the OP was just having one of those days where u feel like your working your little sox off and getting nowhere. Its easy, when youre feeling like that, to look around and see what everyone else has and wonder why, when your working X hours and saving X money,you cant afford it . I dont think he had any malice towards stay at home mums if anything he wished that was something that they could do. I think on the whole that tax credits are great because as previous posters have said , it allows children to have up bringing that they otherwise may not have been able to have and it helps people who are doing great jobs in the community (bin men/woman, careres ,cleaners etc) make a reasonable wage. BUT like everything they are certain people that just rip the a**e out of things and take what they arent entitled to and I think thats what makes the OP ( and alot of other people) angry. However as lots of people have said you dont know what goes on behind closed doors and expressing unhealthy interest in other people finances only leads you to feeling bitter. You just need to do the best you can with what you have

MyLastFiver

frenchconnection200 wrote: »

the system therefore is skewed when people know thay are better off not working and can afford to have lots of kids and holidays, big TV's etc.

Interesting how you lump having kids in with big TVs and holidays. They are not consumer items.

My taxes my taxes blah blah blah

Oh, stop whinging. As this thread has established, lots of people can afford to stay home with they kids (including my wife) because their partners support them on one income.

And are you really that mean that you would begrudge people getting Working Family Tax Credit? Are you really suggesting that all new mothers should be forced to go to work, so all children should be brought up by strangers in nurseries? Listen to yourself.

Some people on this thread should show a little more human spirit and a little less spiteful, petty jealousy.

Teenie_D

My god no much wonder so many mothers feel guilty! If you stay at home to look after your children your a scrounger and if you go to work you are happy to send your children off to nursery to be looked after strangers! I would love to stay at home to look after my little girl but I would be worse off if i did and would not be able to pay our debts, so I try to compromise and work part time.
I was going to say I would love to know how many people appear to "work the system" but actually I dont really care, it is really hard going but we can pay our debts off and eventually the day will come when we are debt free -with the help from this site (and yes I do get CB and CTC and I dont feel guilty about it -I have worked for 17 years and I think i have earned it !)

Treadmill

The simple answer is that sometimes you just have to accept that some people earn more money than you and can afford for one of the partners to stay home, thats just the way it is. Sometimes people have nice cars, holidays and all the trappings because they earn good money, not necessarily because they are in debt. I'm not saying that there are not cases where people live beyond their means as there quite obviously are but its not always the case.

*Vikki*

Pobby wrote: »

Why do people want " things ", I find it sad. I have an old telly, does the business, Y reg car, love it and my wife has an S reg. Both required for work. We nearly went bust coming out of the last recession and is it to my eternal sadness that a couple of inheritances saved our bacon. We now live in a modest house with savings, my wife works very hard and I also have done for all our working life.

Having ones own business and chancing it all when interest rates were very high was not great for us, coupled with 4 firms going bust on us owing a great deal of money.


I am just grateful that I don`t hanker after all the trappings. Certainly I don`t do debt, and although, commision only, did well for a few years that really got us back on our feet when I had to close our old business down.

I will be retiring in a few years, and will be happy if we live our modest lives together. I have experimented with living within the means that our retirement income may provide , it`s very easy.

So many have been conned by the want it all culture. Humph, total ruibbish tat will lead to unhappiness.

Brilliant post! I love hearing from people like you, as you are a rare breed!