DMP Mutual Support Thread (Part 6)

katkins2

muddlemess wrote: »

Thanks - I'm just hoping they receive my payment ok! DMP starts on 1 Oct so no payments have been sent to them yet. I need to contact CCCS though as they have said that they will accept from 5 October on my Loan acceptance but they won't get payment from CCCS until 25 so hope this doesn't upset the apple cart!

No secrets not sure why they appear to be so charitable, maybe cause I owe them so much and after 20 years of banking with them they have earnt a pretty penny from me! who knows, this is the first time though I have missed any payments with them since I started banking with them at 16! who knows really shocked though, just hope this isn't the calm before the storm!

Hope you manage to get things sorted out soon. xx

Thanks, hopefully once they've received the first couple of payments they'll lay off a bit. I too have banked with them for over 15 years and have only missed payments for the first time last month. I hold my hands up and admit that we have gotten ourselves into the mess we are in, just wish they would be a little more accomodating and a little less threatening when we are asking for help in trying to pay it back.
Anyway, moan over, thanks again for your kind words. Think I may be climbing the walls if it wasn't for this board and all the lovely people on it. x

katkins2

Hi pinkpower and scouselad,

thanks for your replies, i think i'll just have to wait and see what happens. I'm kind of hoping that as they only e-mailed me on 25th to acknowledge my dmp and the fact that they should receive the CCCS payment sometime this week, this will count as my payment to be received by 21st October. Fingers crossed;)
K x

cheesedoffwithdebt

katkins2 wrote: »

Hi pinkpower and scouselad,

thanks for your replies, i think i'll just have to wait and see what happens. I'm kind of hoping that as they only e-mailed me on 25th to acknowledge my dmp and the fact that they should receive the CCCS payment sometime this week, this will count as my payment to be received by 21st October. Fingers crossed;)
K x

Just to say I found Next very helpful as well- they got onto it straight away and have been very clear from the outset- which is a credit to them I have to say! I hope all goes well.

Brussel_Sprout

Blimey I cant get online for a few days and it takes me half an hour to catch up!

I've had a shocker of a week and an even worse weekend, my car is terminal and because of my debt I am unable to buy a new one, so Im going to have to see what I can get for mine and then get a banger with what I get. Lots of arguments and crying have gone on as my other half isn't involved in all my debt as it all happened before i met him, but obviously the pressure is on both of us

Also, I will have been on my DMP for 3 years in October and I still haven't dared tell my family - neither my parents or sister know about my state of affairs. My OH thinks I should tell them as it is putting pressure on him as he is the only one who knows - Im so ashamed of the state I got into I don't want to dissappoint my parents - is that sad at nearly 31?!!

Has anyone any tips on how to broach the subject? Do i be honest and tell them the full scale or sugar coat it slightly so it's not so alarming?!

Can't wait to amend my total again this month, payment goes out on the first

Hope everyone else had a good weekend?

DevonGirl

Brussel_Sprout wrote: »

Also, I will have been on my DMP for 3 years in October and I still haven't dared tell my family - neither my parents or sister know about my state of affairs. My OH thinks I should tell them as it is putting pressure on him as he is the only one who knows - Im so ashamed of the state I got into I don't want to dissappoint my parents - is that sad at nearly 31?!!

Has anyone any tips on how to broach the subject? Do i be honest and tell them the full scale or sugar coat it slightly so it's not so alarming?!

It's interesting that your OH wants you to tell your family as "it is putting pressure on him". Doesn't sound very supportive does it?!

If you do decide to tell your family (your choice not his) but don't want to upset them too much, you could always tell them that you've started a new 'paying off debt plan' which will mean you have to be a lot tighter with money for a while - this is rather than telling them you're in an organised DMP which of course sounds a lot scarier to those who don't know about these schemes. Just an idea?

Just to let you know that I am in my 30s and have not told my family about my DMP. I think at my age it's not something they need to know about, to be honest. Yes, there is a sense that they'd be disappointed, but I'm not ashamed of it. I've got in to debt (totally my own fault) but am dealing with it in a responsible way. I personally would not take any pressure from an OH about whether to talk to my family, but that's just me and my opinion....

Best wishes
DG

geoffmr1

DevonGirl wrote: »

It's interesting that your OH wants you to tell your family as "it is putting pressure on him". Doesn't sound very supportive does it?!

If you do decide to tell your family (your choice not his) but don't want to upset them too much, you could always tell them that you've started a new 'paying off debt plan' which will mean you have to be a lot tighter with money for a while - this is rather than telling them you're in an organised DMP which of course sounds a lot scarier to those who don't know about these schemes. Just an idea?

Just to let you know that I am in my 30s and have not told my family about my DMP. I think at my age it's not something they need to know about, to be honest. Yes, there is a sense that they'd be disappointed, but I'm not ashamed of it. I've got in to debt (totally my own fault) but am dealing with it in a responsible way. I personally would not take any pressure from an OH about whether to talk to my family, but that's just me and my opinion....

Best wishes
DG

Hi Devongirl,

I agree with you. You need support from those around you that do know your circumstances, in my instance my debts are also linked with my OH. We do argue from time to time over the debts as mine were considerable larger than hers, but at the end of the day that was due to food shopping etc going onto my cards.

I'm in my 30's & whilst I haven't told my parents of our situation I have told them I no longer deal with credit cards & will only buy things for cash. I've also made sure they know how little money we survive on because it is a relief not to pretend I can afford the sort of stuff that they can & it stops them asking me why I don't upgrade my car for a new one or tv to a plasma.

The one mistake people make about those of us in debt, is that they think we have run up these large debts living the high life. I don't doubt there are a few out there that have done that, but the majority haven't. The only reason I have any debts now is because I didn't know about the National debtline & forums like this one, if I had I'd be debt free now. I tried all the consolidating loans & credit cards and just ended up in a larger mess all because these financial institutions don't give you the full information or even the correct info half the time. I'd say 3 quarters of what I owe now is interest charges & payment fees etc, not money I spent buying top notch tv's.

saskia1

geoffmr1 wrote: »

Hi Devongirl,


The one mistake people make about those of us in debt, is that they think we have run up these large debts living the high life. I don't doubt there are a few out there that have done that, but the majority haven't. The only reason I have any debts now is because I didn't know about the National debtline & forums like this one, if I had I'd be debt free now. I tried all the consolidating loans & credit cards and just ended up in a larger mess all because these financial institutions don't give you the full information or even the correct info half the time. I'd say 3 quarters of what I owe now is interest charges & payment fees etc, not money I spent buying top notch tv's.

sooo true geoffmr1!!!

we are also in our 30's and have told both sets of parents. it was really a case of having too - my mum noticed i wasn't using credit cards (!!!) and the in laws - they were talking about equity release for themselves and then it all came out - BUT i think its the best thing - each time i say ''can't afford it'' they all understand - my parents even ask if i need money or shopping!

we have told some friends that we have got rid of our CCs and are paying off our debts and i can honestly say not one of our friends have treated us any differently -and if they did -what does that say!?

katkins - am with you re Lloyds - have had my Cc with them since about 1995 and they have refused to accept dmp payment (£55 on 8k debt) saying they want ''larger payment''

am now being threatened with their solicitors. have called them & written & pleaded but falls on deaf ears. what to do next???

sas x

Daffykjs

JillyOJolly wrote: »

Hi All

posting for a moan I'm afraid.

Just received the 3rd statement this week - odd I hear you say, all your accounts should be closed when I paid the last intsey winsey little bits of interest! NOOOOOOO Those incredible robbing (want to swear here but wont) keep forgetting to click the "Bye bye debted customer, you dont owe us any money any more" button. How foolish and those poor people in every customers services I have rang this week and screamed at them to close the accounts. Only 10p interest here and 12p there, but I have demanded that is reversed off the account and then closed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! purlease

I tell you, you would think this was the easy bit getting them to say goodbye after such a terrible time of paying back debts, but no, they want to hang onto you for all they are worth! Idiots the lot of them. One woman told me today they would not confirm my details until I gave them the last three digits on the back of the card - "A CREDIT CARD I HAVE NOT HAD FOR FOUR YEARS AND SENT BACK IN LITTLE PIECES WHEN I STARTED WITH PAYPLAN", kept asking her how I could give her the number when I "DONT HAVE A CARD" when she had asked for it 4 times and I repeated the above, louder each time I hasten to add - Oh she says - completely purplexed that I would have to make her stray from her robotic sheet of paper of what to say next!

Lets see what next week brings!

why were you charged interest on NOTHING?? I don't get it! Inbeciles! Glad you gave them h3ll and hope that's IT now!!

Daffykjs

Both the parents and in-laws know about our DMP. My dad knew first coz i originally spoke to a fee charging company and was confused by it all, (they wanted 18% and i couldn't figure out how in the h3ll this was going to help me when that was more than the interest for some of the creditors) so i took it to my dad for advice.

however this was a couple of years ago now (i didn't do it, i decided i could 'sort it myself'. wish i'd known about Payplan and CCCS then) and the numbers have gone up and also been combined with hubby's numbers and my dad (or any of them for that matter) don't know the actual numbers, and i'd prefer that it stays that way! it was a relief telling my dad coz he's helped with things when they've gone wrong and we simply couldn't pay for them. since realising we need to do something, the washing machine, fridge freezer, tv, car and boiler (2 or 3 times) have broken and i've had to go crawling to our parents!! its embarrassing and i do feel like a bit of a failure being a married 32 year old having to get help from my dad, but it really helps to know they are all there for support and that i can be open about it.

i actually even quite enjoy explaining it to people coz it's been such a good thing for me and i feel very (most of the time) positive about it. the in-laws didn't know at first but hubby works for his mum so we had to tell them eventually to explain that her paying him practically nothing was a problem.

most of my friends know too! again they don't know the numbers (apart from one who helped me set my budget out). i'm actually quite proud of myself for telling people! coz for years i was embarrassed and wanted no one to know i'd got myself in such a state! but now i'm proud that i'm dealing with it and i know a lot of my friends are having trouble too so i've advised a lot of them it might work for them too! (My sil started her DMP a couple of months before we did)

so i would say if you're close to them it could be good to tell them, but you don't need to tell them the numbers (my mum really wants to know but she'd probably have a heart attack as it sounds so bad). just explain what a DMP is and that it's all under control and nothing to worry about etc. but if you don't need their support then i'd say you don't have to tell them. its not like they are involved in your finacnes anymore. and as others have said just say you're on a tight budget now!

CASR25

Have not visited this forum for a while - had a baby the daylast my hubby and I posted (three weeks ago)!!!! Think it was the relief of lbm and knowing it can get sorted!!!!

Need more advice - this is where we're at...(you may want to read my previous posts)
-we've recieved the letter from cccs, we have to send them proof of income and statements from our creditors. (Have them copied and ready to send tomorrow).
-we have set a new bank account up with a bank we don't owe any money to.
-we have arranged for our next months pay to go into the new account and are about to move essential direct debts to the new account too.
-we have both just been paid and our regular direct debits incl the ones to the creditors are about to come out in the month ahead - but again we don't have money to live on.

so my questions to you fab people are...
-when do we cancel our creditors directdebits? Before our next pay? Or before the official dmp start date that cccs give us?
when do we inform the creditors - i think we're going to have to tell some this month as we can not afford to live without using credit cards again which is what spurred us onto this in the first place!
-will cccs be bothered as we've had to put some living costs onto cc before we were paid as needed food etc - so amount has changed for individual cc (but I actually over estimated the loan repayment figures I put down originally so the total figure I said we owe is more than we actually do - if you get my gist).
-do cccs accept print out statements from net as don't have paper bills for some???

Hope someone can help and that my questions are ok to understand (sleep deprived at the moment so a bit confussing/confussed!)

Thanks,

Cx