How do you move on after the loss of a pet?

emma12345

Hi, I lost my dog yesterday evening, he had been slowing down for a while, had arthritis, but I still didn't expect to find him in the kitchen that way. Probably a heart attack. He was 12.

Does anyone have any tips on how to get over the loss of an animal? The house feels so empty and lonely without him, I miss him so much. I had him since he was 3 months old and he was very much part of the family. I work at home and don't even want to be in the house, it feels too lonely now.

How do I stop crying and get a grip?

Em

marshallka

I don't know on this one but I have to say my thoughts are with you. I don't know if this will make things worse or better but my daughter found it a comfort

http://www.indigo.org/rainbowbridge_ver2.html

The upset will not go yet and you need to cry and allow yourself this time to cry. Its only natural. There will come a day though when you can think of your loved pet and smile your way through it. Its just too soon yet.

Love to you and yours.

xx

Shapeshifter

Hi em, so sorry for your loss, there's no easy answer, other than to distract yourself.
I would get out of the house for awhile, have you someone you could meet up with to pass a few hours. When this happened to me the only comfort i got was that digi was not suffering anymore.

lab-lover

My sympathies to you:sad:

Tell yourself he was well cared for and loved, had a good life, which is tons more than some dogs get.

Sorry thats the only words I can offer you.

Sending you a big hug

Mutter_2

Emma, I'm so sorry for you. Not only have you lost a member of the family but you had the shock of it being sudden too.
You can't expect not to be crying buckets at present, it's far too soon.
There is a Website giving 10 ways of coping, though you may not feel strong enough to read it yet. http://www.pet-loss.net/surviving.html

He had a wonderful life with you and a painless end.
Hope your grief lifts a little soon.

skintchick

You have to grieve like you would for any loss and it's way too soon yet to be over him.

Just let yourself be sad, and in time you'll begin to feel better.

It's awful losing a loved one and I'm dreading my kizzycat going (she's somewhere between 16 and 18) but you have to remember the happy times and know what a good life you gave them.

emma12345

Thank you for all your replies, they are appreciated. I went out this afternoon and didn't feel as bad but when I got back to the empty house felt bad again. I guess you're right, it takes time to move on.

Em xx

YorkiePud_3

Oh you poor thing ... it is heartbreaking to lose a pet, in whatever circumstances, but there are no right or wrong ways to grieve.

You need to allow yourself time ... be kind to yourself, let yourself cry ... the first few days can go by in a bit of a blur and when you look back, you don't really know how you get through them.

The house will feel terribly strange ... you'll keep thinking about feeding him, about changing his drinking water ... we do these things automatically and so when the time comes when we no longer have to do it, it really hits us hard.

Little things will make you feel mad, or make you feel like you will never be able to stop crying.

That's why I say be kind to yourself ... don't think, "oh, I should be able to cope with this!" ... or, "I should be over this by now" in a few weeks time.

You have lost your best friend ... a pet who was part of your life to such an extent that right now, nothing feels right.

You have to allow yourself time to grieve in whatever way feels right for you. If that means clearing away leads, bowls and all signs of your pet, then go for it ... if it means leaving these things about and you feel some comfort from them being around, then leave them there.

You don't have to wipe away all memories of your pet ... you have to do what YOU feel ok with ... *S*

I still have a lead hanging by my front door that belonged to a little yorkie I had who passed away over 15 years ago ... and do you know, I look at it from time to time as I am going out and I just smile and think about him.
I still have the old leather leads my greyhound used, twisted round my bedhead, I've still got the old magnet collar one of my chihuahuas had - all these things are on show, so to speak and it comforts me to see them around ... time has made it easier to think of the ones I have lost and remember just the good bits ... and that is what will happen for you, too.

It will take however long it takes ... don't beat yourself up ... just take it day by day, remember your friend with love and the day will come when the only memories you have are GOOD ones, happy ones ...

Take care of yourself ... I have been here so many times, having lost pets ... it's true that they each leave pawprints on our hearts *S*

xxxx

marshallka

Yorkiepud, that has started me off now with your post.

carlislelass

we lost our cat when she was 14, worst time was when we came back after shopping and she wasn`t sitting in the flowerbed. four months later our son & his girlfriend split up ( both had a cat) and they couldn`t agree who was having them, said we would take one ...10yrs later he`s still here, a proper softee and I`m dreading going through it again.

clutterydrawer

You can;t rush it...you have to have time to heal naturally.

When i lose a pet i make a scrapbook of all my photos/memories of them to make sure i never forget anything....and i tend to step up my voluntary work at the animal shelter too cos extra time with animals makes me feel less lonely.