concerned about 10yr old daughters weight

aeuerby

My daughter was ovrweight when she was 7 onwards.
The main problem started when she was picked on in the changing rooms at school by some older girls.
From that day she hated PE and still does.
She hates most forms of exercise if she knows she's doing it but thinks nothing about how far she walks in a school day!
We tried everything to encourage her to exercise and nothing worked.
She is incredibly intelligent and very very artistic. She would happily spend the day drawing etc.

Then, at 10 she got her periods. Shot up in height and is now around 5ft 6. She's 12.
She has lost all of her weight, her belly has gone.
She still won't "exercise" but like I said does an awful lot of walking during the school day.

milliemonster

Well, so far so good! we haven't radically overhauled her eating as such over the last couple of weeks but she is eating smaller portions how (which I have done without her noticing) and although I am still letting her have occasional treats I try to encourage her to choose something healthier.

She has started the street dancing class and is really enjoying that, she has also been out rollerskating after school so she is getting a little bit more active.

I do let her know how much I love her and think she is gorgeous no matter what shape or size she is, I did weigh her and she was 7st 12lbs, but last week was down a couple of pounds so that has made her feel much more motivated. I don't want her weighing herself though, I've told her now to just concentrate on being active and trying to make healthy choices and she then doesn't need to worry about her weight, just how she feels and if her clothes fit better

its a long road ahead I think, but we'll get there

ailuro2

Thanks for the update - our 10yo is on the stretch again, I haven't measured her but we can see just by looking at her she's grown taller.

Kids should never lose any considerable amount of weight, but should be allowed to grow into their weight.;)

margaretclare

I think there may be 2 problems here.

1. Lack of activity. I have always been 'plump' and especially now in later life, but at your daughter's age we all walked and cycled just to get to and from school etc. The fact that children no longer need to is part of the problem. Like her, I was always to be found drawing and writing, but I had no choice but to walk or cycle to school. I was no good at organised sports at school, but nowadays there are other things that young people can do as individuals. There are far more choices now. How about dance? Things to do as an individual.

I suggest: an activity with other young people - Guides/Brownies or similar. Or Sea Cadets. All of these organisations have physical activity as a part of the normal programme. Or, contact your local authority and see what's available. My eldest granddaughter is a youth worker and her remit is organising activities, from canoeing and sailing in the summer to badminton and other indoor games in winter.

2. It's possible that your daughter has developed the ability to over-ride the 'full' signal i.e. she no longer knows when she's had enough and that's why she eats up left-overs. This is something you can control. Make sure you deal with the left-overs before she has chance to get to them!

If you look at some of the hugely-overweight people that are periodically paraded before us on TV, it must be the case that they have over-ridden their 'full' signals. Normally, when a person has had enough they stop eating - that's true throughout the animal kingdom, you don't see any overweight lions in the wild! This is a question of re-education. Maybe a dietician at your GP's surgery could help?

Just a few thoughts.

lizzie_dripping

milliemonster wrote: »

She does go to cubs where they are active, but unfortunately they all get sweets there aswell!, I don't particularly like that but what can I do? its unfair for me to not allow her some money to have sweets at cubs when everyone else gets them?

This stood out for me. The only reason for them to sell sweets at Cubs is to raise money. I totally disagree with it as I think it sends out the wrong message.

Have a word with your daughter's Akela or leader and say that she won't be having any sweets money for a while. Maybe they can distract her with a little job or activity during tuck break.

david17589

I say stop feeding them rubish, make them do house work and really make the sweat because it might sound bad to some but if you love them then you have to get strick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

splishsplash

Current guidelines are one hour's moderate intensity physical activity for children most (5+) days a week every week, and moving most of the time (i.e. off the couch doing something!). Moderate intensity means sweaty and a little puffed, so not strolling or putting in light effort.

That's just to maintain heart health.

If there's a weight issue, she needs to be doing more than that, and some periods of higher intensity exercise also.

As there really is no easy way to do this at home, she needs to be involved in team sports, sports clubs, athletics clubs or swimming clubs, most of which will have 1.5-2 hour training sessions at least three days a week, with games/competitions at weekends.

It's all very well for her to say she doesn't like it, but it's a matter of her health. It's as necessary a good diet and enough sleep. She'll be eternally grateful to you in years to come for encouraging her to be more active.

What you do with her now will help determine her attitutes to her health, diet and exercise through her teens and into adulthood. It also means you may need to lead by example _pale_.

savvykaz

I too would have to agree with looby75. My DD is now 15 but at 10 she weighed 7stone 5lb and she too had a "flabby belly". She was in kids clothes about 2 years older than she was and I was very conscious of it even though I didn't say anything to her - so afraid she may become anorexic!

Now she is 5ft 7, weighs just 8 stone and wears size 8/10 clothes. We didn't change her diet, she didn't become any more active, but as soon as she started her periods just before her 13th birthday the weight slowly fell off, she shot up in height and everything suddenly became more in proportion.

All I will add to what everyone else has said is be VERY careful your daughter doesn't sense any of your vibes, encourage healthy eating and trying a bit more exercise and I too will bet that your DD will be the same as many others on here when she hits puberty.
One other thing, my DD spends a lot of time on her best friend's trampoline and wii-fit and as this is great fun, they don't really see it as exercise - would these be an option?

HTH, but don't worry too much

milliemonster

jenhug wrote: »

Have you considered whether she has an underactive thyroid, you say your son has an overactive thyroid, so it is possible. My friend has just had hers refused, and has only just been told that the aching arms and legs she had were related to thyroid trouble. She said she found sports difficult as a child as she tired quickly.

Also, your daughter is coming up to "that age" and sounds exactly like my 10 year old daughter!

I had not thought about this until you have mentioned it, my son was born with an underdeveloped thryroid gland (so it was underactive not overactive) and was a hefty baby, his thyroid has been struggling to cope since birth and last year the consultant started him on thyroxine, he is now like a stick but his levels are ok.

Now I know a lot of overweight people blame metabolism for their weight issues and I'm not suggesting that is what's wrong with my daughter but I think with my son having thyroid problems it is worth at least ruling it out that she also doesn't have an underactive thyroid. So I have made her an appt with the GP in the morning for a chat about it.

She is now not snacking between meals at all (or if she does its a piece of fruit), her portion sizes are suitable for her age, she is eating healthy well balanced meals and is being much more active. She is 'developing' though so maybe its all just down to her hormones aswell? I don't know but I'll see what the GP says in the morning