Diary of how I went from ican to iquit (abridged version!!)

iquit

Well nearly 2 months since I updated my BR saga/ diary I thought I'd get in touch again. It's been a tough couple of months on both a work and personal front:mad::mad:. The problems have not been anything special but being BR has however just left me with a heightened sensitivity button which is turned on and cranked up to its maximum setting:o. My negative frame of mind has meant I've limited my posts here. I just thought until I'm over this funk I better not taint anyone else with my voodoo. I have lurked and would like to congratulate all those who've shared their happy times - early discharges, new arrivals & new homes:j:j. Having loving family and friends has helped me no end. They paid for me to have a two week budget break to Europe. When I got back I then read on this forum I was meant to have told my OR. OMG, I missed that in the small print:o. It just made me feel more like a convicted criminal - having to check in and get permission from my parole officer:(. On the technicalities of BR I am waiting to get a nil tax code via moonbeaver who've requested payslips. I've not heard anything from my OR about BI. Money is tight, but thank the good Lord I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food on my plate (admittedly value brands but belly filling none the less).I'm eternally grateful to this forum for letting me vent, hopefully my next update will be a whole heap more positive.

iquit

Well well well. Who would have thunk it? I am now 33 months post BR and still going strong(ish). I can not believe how quickly time has flown - although it didn't feel like it at the time.
2009 was all about filing for br, going through the formalities and fighting off a nervous breakdown.
2010 was about me making changes in my career which was just what I needed, it included a promotion. I got my AD. I had some challenging moments here but all in all life ticked on nicely.
2011 was pretty eventful. I bought back the BI in my property. 2 very close friends up and moved to the UAE within a few weeks of each other. They are both doing well and are encouraging me to make enquiries into moving over there. Started a course at uni but had to pull out for a bit when the money I'd saved had to go to car repairs! I approached Barclays Bank (a br creditor) and they happily opened a basic account for me, they then threw in a savings account too. I'm running both acocounts with caution at the moment, have been dealt with respectfully and politely when I've had to go in for appointments. Co-op bank account is still my main account into which my salary is paid.
2012 rolled up unannounced (or so it seems) where has the time gone? I have high hopes for this year and do truely the 'worst' is over.
To all those faced with br or new to the br experience please know that there is life after it. It may take time to get there but get there you will. This forum is full of helpful people and info. Take your time, do your research and make the decision based on what is right for your circumstances.

~Fleur~

Wishing you every bit of luck for your future Happiness is everything :j

iquit

Hello guys,

I thought to update my little br blog lol. Well my 3rd br anniversary rolled by without any pomp or ceremony - saving that all for the Queen, I love the Queen.

Unfortunately I'll be working straight through until Thursday morning. Going to work has been a challenge lately, especially with all the cutbacks = less money, fewer staff, more work! But I will soldier on, only 11 more ipa payments to make and my legally binding bankruptcy commitment will be over. I am grateful to have a job in these tough times where so many are losing theirs. On the financial front weird, wacky and sometimes wonderful things have been going on. On the weird and wacky debt collection letters addressed to my ex have been landing on my door step (why as this was never an address of his), Santander have now taken to sending me account changes and updates - I still ignore them, got a Vanquis card 4 months ago & have never used it but keep getting calls (all from different numbers) offering me extra facilities and upgrades which I kindly decline. On the wonderful front Barclays have allowed me internet access and opened an ISA for me (another safe haven for my millions - please note the sarcasm here ), my mortgage providor wrote a letter saying to call them if I wish to discuss or make any changes to my account - not taken them up on their kind offer yet as I am under ipa and therefore have no bargaining room with regards to mortgage payments. I'll just have to keep a good record on payments and hope they feel just as generous when I approach them.

Other than that life is steadily ticking by.I'm a little lonely as 2 very good and close friends moved to the UAE last summer(taking my god-children with). It's harder to make close friends as we get older, that and the fact that work takes up a lot of my time and energy. I see others living their lives whilst feeling like mine is passing me by. Lots of weddings and babies amongst family and colleagues recently. It just reminds me I'm an aging spinister and have been for the best part of 5 years. Apparently I make a brilliant aunt and god-mother which is better than nothing I guess . I've been contemplating a move abroad myself but again my current circumstances make it a bit difficult to even contemplate this. Both my friends and their families are enjoying themselves, challenges and all. Please don't get me wrong, as melancholic as my post is I am lucky and appreciate what I have. I am especially grateful for this forum through which I have been able to share my experience and those of many others - thank you and good bye until my next instalment.
PS written without grammar or spelling checks!

tigerfeet2006

Thanks for the update Iqui. Nice to see that you are plodding on with out to many problems just the usual work/life balance ones most seem to have.

I am another that is moving to the UAE soon and I am looking forward to the lifestyle change. Why don't you think it would be possible for you to move?

DelW

Wow iquit I've just come across your diary and read it with great interest. I went BR a month ago after see-sawing back and forth for 8 years - should I, shouldn't I? I know there is life after BR but still taking it cautiously for now. Still in the early stages I think. Waiting for OR to call back about bank statements possibly.
My daughter has paid for me to go on holiday with her and my son's family in a couple of weeks. I didn't know I had to tell OR so thanks for that. Feels strange as a 50 something to have to report in to someone.
I don't have property or any assets so hope the process will be straightforward. I have been advised that it will be.
Thanks again for your diary.

iquit

I've been AWOL for a bit, busy with the mundane things in life. Looking back on 2012, again I am amazed at how quickly the year flew by. In terms of my br life, I finalised transferring my flat back from OR to me with the land registry - a great relief when it was all done.Thanks to the post by hopefulfooluk which I used as a diy guide https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/2471695
Nothing else really to report back. My visits and contributions to the forum have not been particularly frequent in the past year. I hope to work on that this year - I need to pay forward all the wonderful help and support I received when my journey began all those years ago.
2013 will be a momentous year for me as my final IPA payment is due this year. I'll also be 4 years into my br, 2 more years and the link on my credit reports/ files should fall off. I have not had the time (or inclination ) to do a credit file clean up.
So basically after the initial heartwrenching and distressing months of br things do settle into a day by day routine where br slowly takes a back seat in your life. When I began my br journey I couldn't imagine not being entirely consumed by it. However it is really up to the individual to grasp the experience as an opportunity for growth. I am trying to do that. I hope the best for all my fellow br and those who are yet to go through it.

IF

Hi iquit, I'm so pleased all is well. Your post will really help all newcomers on their BR journey :beer:

Love
IF...x

iquit

I just wanted to update my br diary quickly. Four years post br I now have completed my IPA payments and begun my journey to becoming mortgage free - as planned before my br drama. I've sat and read this diary with great interest. At times it felt like I was reading about someone else and other times the flood of emotion that was roused was overwhelming and heart wrenching. Time really is a great healer and if not a healer it at least eases the pain of most situations, dulling the intensity of memories that hurt along the way. To all my fellow br folk be strong, stay well and God bless - until my next update. For anyone interested (or wanting to give moral support - no pressure lol) I am going to start a MFW diary - either today or tomorrow to record my efforts.

alastairq

thanks for that iquit....perhaps time also can open up new doors too?