Burlesque Babe's Re-building life but back in debt diary

Burlesque_Babe

He would sign on, yes. I'm not sure of the rules when redundancy is involved though. I just don't want to see him go through mentail pain when there are solutions but for whatever reason he won't go for them.

I even looked and there is a job in a small school which needs a classroom teacher who would lead PE overall for the school. I'll tell him about it but I know he will say 'no' because it is a classroom job (ie teaching primary kids everything) rather than a specialist PE role.

Burlesque_Babe

Went to see Charlie this morning for his walk and had a chat with my ex. He was better than I thought he would be to be honest, which was a relief. He has decided to send his CV to all the local schools offering himself for supply from September and has asked if I can help with a covering letter and what to put on a CV. I'mhappy to help -that kind of thing isn't one of his strengths. He only has internet access at work so I've advised him to consider getting broadband and a cheap laptop so he can start getting into online banking and using the internet as a resource. He said he thought that was a good thing to do, and I also pointed him in the direction of the local library for free access. It's opposite where I work and is very under utilised so he wouldn't have to queue or anything.

I also had a chat with him about how to divvy up his money. He will have 12 weeks salary (he was lucky - he had an old contract with 12 weeks notice, most people had a newer one with 4), his redundancy of about 6k and his insurance at some point of about 5k. I've said to move it all to another account and for 3 months pay himself his normal salary, but minimise all his outgoings right down to the bone to see if he can squeeze a 4th month from it (his income is about 1800 p/m). I've given him some ideas on where to shave from his budget - all quite painless things but I reckon about £200 worth (plus more if he can stop the takeaways and posh food!) and I've said after the 3 months, have a look where he is in life and then plan from there with the money and whether he has to start using it as an income. He will probably get summer school work with AFC Bournemouth again. I've said to see that as credit card busting money - last year it was £700.

I know people will think I'm weird for helping so much, but it is because I see people on DFW who come not knowing what to do and get so much support. He isn't the kind of person to come to a forum so I just think the least I can do is be a kind of DFW 'outpost' to help him just as anyone on here would.

Onto me - I'm still crawling towards £10 on the free scratchcards, but reckon I'll hit £10 at the end of the month - not much but might be the difference between enough petrol and pushing the car home one night.

Need to really get my head down now and start AQA'ing for the day, but I am really not in the mood :rolleyes:

ZTD

beanielou wrote: »

It was Arran & it felt like it was in another life.
Well it was in so many ways.

Don't think I've ever been to Arran - though it does seem somewhat popular.

beanielou wrote: »

B~Sorry to read the news on your XOH.
At the end of the day hard as it is you cant do this for him.
My XH was the same & has gone from one crisis to another, I helped advise him last time but as I see it that was his last chance & he has now hit the buffers again & is at the end of the line.
I know how hard it is not to take it all on board but we cant do it for them.

You can offer help - but NEVER take responsibility. If these men (both your and BB's X's) are looking for mothers, then they can find them somewhere else.

ZTD

Burlesque_Babe wrote: »

I know people will think I'm weird for helping so much, but it is because I see people on DFW who come not knowing what to do and get so much support. He isn't the kind of person to come to a forum so I just think the least I can do is be a kind of DFW 'outpost' to help him just as anyone on here would.

You're not weird for helping your XOH. Although you have had a failed relationship with him, that doesn't mean he should be ostracised from you and you should be setting fire to small effigies of him every night.

However, you should be making sure that he is accepting your *help* and not just getting you to do everything for him.

He's not your responsibility, he is an adult, and you have your own problems which should be your first responsibility. OTOH, it's good he is at least paying lipservice to his problem, and it hasn't taken signing-on to bring reality to his door.

Burlesque_Babe

yawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwn. Another Monday dawns........plan for the day is teaching tonight (last class of the course), my own teacher training this afternoon, take Charlie and then a couple of hours until then to do some AQA.

I didn't do any AQA all weekend I was feeling a bit resentful at having to sit here every single weekend and although I fought it with 'well, you need the money', I'm afraid I didn't do any at all So silly really, but I just needed a weekend off.

Off to do my daily scratchcard, get a shower and try to shake off some of this hayfever and get into the day!

hypno06

Resentful is normal - I feel it frequently.....don't beat yourself up over the weekend, get on with the week, and fit in the AQA as and when you have the energy to - you will catch up much more easily when you are in the right frame of mind than when you are feeling "meh" about the whole thing.

Have a good day x

Burlesque_Babe

ta hypno xxx There is the likelihood that I won't earn enough to cover the bills for July now I've done this (and it was going to be a slog even if I did) so I think I will definitely be using my savings next month . Ah well..........

Won £1 on the daily scratchard so just 30p from £10

Booked tickets for the Bristol meet in September.

Burlesque_Babe

Got my music magpie cheque for £28 - literally a week after posting the CD's. Very impressed.

That's £88 I have in cheques to pay in. I'll go down to town one afternoon after work.

Burlesque_Babe

couple of things to report.

I am on £9.90 on daily scratchcard so will hit £10 tomorrow -just need for it to be £10.10 the next day to withdraw £10 and start again.

LoB CC arrived - already!! It has a limit of £4390 (very precise!!) and so I am going to sort out moving the 3 CC debts I have onto it this afternoon.

Booked and received my train tickets for the Bristol meet in September It was £30 return. Also booked a hotel through an offer so am all ready for that - although obviously there is Weybiza in August but as that is so close I only need to buy a ticket on the day.

Had a very interesting conversation. The job with possible Cruella contact I was interviewed for/they didn't appoint to/I didn't want it anyway and hated the offices/saw it advertised with a recruitment agency so stuck my CV in to perhaps see what happened?

Someone called me from the agency. She asked what I was doing now and why I was interested. I played it dumb and said Iused to work at the hospital - she knew this though from my CV. She said 'which department - do you know Cruella?' I thought 'huh??!!!' as theyhaven't recruited anyone into the department for 2 years so why she would just happen to know her name was odd.

Anyway, I let her say which organisation it was for. I played it naive and said 'no, really??!!! -I had an interview but didn't realise it was the same job as it isn't worded the same'.

And - after a bit more of a conversation - she said 'well they told me they didn't recruit because they didn't feel anyone had the necessary communication skills and experience'. :mad::mad:

I managed to turn 'what a load of absolute bollocks' in my head into 'really? That is really odd if you look at my 15 years of experience in communications'. :rolleyes:

I kept playing the 'shocked and stunned' act and she said my information was 'interesting'.....she asked what my feedback had been. I said 'I wasn't able to get any. I phoned 3 times as arranged and she never answered. I gave her the opportunity to email me and she didn't'.

So...........the recruitment woman thought quick on her feet and said 'perhaps they thought you were too senior'.

Yeah, perhaps :rolleyes:. And perhaps they had been fed information from a certain person about why I really left the hospital and thought I was damaged goods :rolleyes:

She said she would speak to them about my comments - I hope she does because they should be squirming for not offering me the job. That isn't me being big headed in any way, but when you have someone who literally ticks all the boxes and can hit the ground running - their excuse as to why they didn't recruit doesn't quite ring true :mad:

Burlesque_Babe

CC's transferred to life of balance card Although the limit on the card is £4390, I could transfer up to £3951 (they are very precise at Barclays!) and my total amount was £3955, so I think I can sort out the other £4 left :rotfl:

Right, so that is all that at 6.8% now with 1 payment rather than 3 at around the 14% or so mark.

Part of me wants to challenge myself to get it cleared within a set time but the other part of me is saying to keep myself steady and just keep paying everything at the minimum until I get a job where I am able to over pay.