Support for people with Depression

joblessummer12

Hi all,

I wasnt sure if i should post or not to be honest. i suffer from depression too and anxiety. i guess i'm just generally feeling fed up at the moment. I'm trying to find a summer job while i'm home for summer hols but havent had any luck. i know many others are in this situation, but its just getting to me alot as i either dont have the experience or employers dont want sessional workers and it gets disheartening to constantly check the job websites and have nothing come up that i can do. :sad: I just feel that i'm trying really hard to get out there you know but having no luck in return.

today i also went to weigh myself and i was mortified to find i had put on 2 stones in such a short period of time, i could cry. i know this is due to my medication, but i look at myself in the mirror and i feel disgusting. but feel like im in a catch 22 situation cos their the first meds in a while thats made feel like im able to cope and half human like you know.

also been having horrible daily headaches, just so fed up and frustrated and just felt i needed to put this out there.

beachbeth

I hope you have seen your doctor about the headaches, Jobless. Go back and see him if you haven't.

I know how you feel. I was always skinny but once I left work and stayed at home on anti-d's I put weight on. Im at least 1 and a half stone overweight and I absolutely hate it. Im only five foot tall and so every pounds makes a big difference to me. I don't think its the meds that have put weight on me its just that Im not out and about so much and when you're at home you can eat more.:rolleyes:

I go into changing rooms and hate what I see so I hardly buy clothes. Everything just looks horrible to me. I think its better to take the meds that make you feel well, even if you are overweight. Id rather be overweight and feeling ok in myself.

I hope this makes sense. Ive got the flu and my brain is so woolly headed at the moment that I can't think straight!

Hang in there and don't worry about your weight - if you try to eat healthily with fruit and veg then a little fat on your body doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

hayley11

I am feeling very bad today. It's my brothers birthday, I was supposed to be popping round and we were going to go for some dinner but i've got a really bad belly and just feel really crappy today (hope it's not swine flu!) and my back and leg are killing. So now he's not going to see anybody all day and somehow this has become my fault I am not the only member of this family. Why should it always be me?

Last Saturday I had to walk around town for about two hours getting clothes because my niece was going camping with school, where was my sister? Sat on her backside at home. :rolleyes: I was in tears with the pain Saturday night. But I know that if I hadn't gone and got them, my niece wouldn't have been able to go camping.

My boyfriends getting really sick of it to be honest. Nobody realises I don't work because I am ill, they think i'm just lazy and i'm tired of having to try and convince people that i'm not lying.

My mum was being horrible again, don't know what her problem is lately. She basically told me that I imagine all my back/leg pain, it's all in my head. Wow don't I have a good imagination! She should be a doctor because clearly she knows more than they do. :rolleyes:

I've scratched my arms up pretty bad today, my boyfriend is going to be upset when he sees them. I can't help it, I don't even know i'm doing it half the time.

Sorry to hear others are feeling low too. I wish I could offer some words of wisdom/advice but I can't Hope you all feel a bit happier soon though

joblessummer12

beachbeth wrote: »

I hope you have seen your doctor about the headaches, Jobless. Go back and see him if you haven't.

I know how you feel. I was always skinny but once I left work and stayed at home on anti-d's I put weight on. Im at least 1 and a half stone overweight and I absolutely hate it. Im only five foot tall and so every pounds makes a big difference to me. I don't think its the meds that have put weight on me its just that Im not out and about so much and when you're at home you can eat more.:rolleyes:

I go into changing rooms and hate what I see so I hardly buy clothes. Everything just looks horrible to me. I think its better to take the meds that make you feel well, even if you are overweight. Id rather be overweight and feeling ok in myself.

I hope this makes sense. Ive got the flu and my brain is so woolly headed at the moment that I can't think straight!

Hang in there and don't worry about your weight - if you try to eat healthily with fruit and veg then a little fat on your body doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

Thank you for your reply. i hope you feel better from the flu soon. I undertsand what your saying but i still cant help feeling disgusting. i was warned before i took these meds of the possible side effects and i did my research before starting them, so i knew for most people weight gain was a more common side effect than what is statistically put out there. i think it was just a shock to see i'd put on so much, especially since starting the AD's i've felt my apetite wasnt so great due to feeling nauseous and have undergone quite a few med changes recently. so i feel like ive gone from eatting if a felt hungry/sometimes having to remind myself to eat, to now having a ravenous appetite cos i feel hungry and its hard to remember thats its artifically produced. i can quite easily polish off a pack of donuts:eek: when i wouldnt have done that before.

yes i have also seen my doc bout my headaches, just going through the ruling out process at the moment by having my sight checked, bp etc

i guess i just want to get back to normal.

Hayley- sorry to hear your not doing so great today..sending big hugggsss if thats ok. it shoudnt be all on you to do so much, but i can understand those family pressures. but it sounds like others need to start pulling their finger out, so dont you feel guilty because you shouldn't have that extra worries put on you. However, maybe you could tell your bro that your available on the weekend to do something to mark his b'day, when your feeling alil better, and that way you'd have something nice to look forward too.

Amber_Sunshine

Hello from Spain. It's blummin' hot today. Anni, you have a foster sister. Don't be fooled by the cute image. Cybermummy is covered in scratches :mad:

LadyMorticia

Omg cybermummy, she ha such beautiful big eyes.

smileyt_2

Hello. I would just like to say how I feel, if that's ok, and maybe to hear someone else say that my feelings are normal - for someone with depression, anyway. Although I would not wish them on anyone, but sometimes it is helpful in funny kind of way to know that I'm not the only person who feels this way.

I'm nearly 40 and I've had depression for most of my life, since I was a little girl. I've been on anti-depressants for about 11 years. I was in therapy for 8 years on a weekly basis. I've tried really hard to put into practice all the self-help stuff. I have two dogs and three pet hens who are my reason for getting up in the mornings because they can't look after themselves. I have an allottment because being outside helps, once I can pluck up the motivation to get my backside down there. Other people see me as bright, funny and articulate. I am good at putting a front on things.

But at the moment I feel as if I just want everything to end. I just want to go to sleep and not wake up. I am not going to commit suicide because my animals need me. But everything feels like such a struggle. I am so tired of having no-one to lean on and having no energy to go out and make friends. (I do have friends but they are all partnered off and/or have little ones so they don't really have time and I don't want to be a burden to anyone). I can't tell people how I feel because it would be a waste of time - what could they do anyway?

I really hate having depression. I hate the fact that it robs me of motivation and energy to do the things I would like to do. I hate the fact that I am becoming de-skilled in the workforce because I can't work full-time. I have been thinking about doing some voluntary work (maybe trying to help someone else might put my own moans into perspective) but I am scared that I will lose the energy to do this and will end up letting them down. I hate the way that depression turns me into a moaning, selfish whinger because any energy I have has to be focussed on getting through the necessities like shopping and even just having clean clothes.

I sometimes feel as if I want to gouge my brain out with a sharp object, just to shut up the thoughts that whirl around in there.

I apologise for moaning. But does anyone recognise these thoughts, and what do you do to help yourself with them?

Thank you for reading this.

beachbeth

I can sympathise with how you're feeling, smileyt. I have suffered with depression since at least 1990 (but looking back I can see I suffered with it earlier than this and as a child too).

I think the first thing you have to keep hold of is the fact that life will get better. You are in a dark tunnel but there is a little chink of light just at the end that you will reach. Go and discuss how you feel with your doctor and take any treatment offered. It is worth trying any meds or therapy if it is going to make you feel better. Even if you think it can't possibly do you any good, just give it a try. Sometimes just knowing that you're doing something positive can help on its own.

Im sure others here will have more advice for you and will be along soon so just hang in there. We all understand exactly how you are feeling. Hugs. ((()))

PS I have 6 dogs whom I adore and they keep me going - plus my daughters who I could never leave. If it wasn't for them I probably wouldn't be here today.

janninew

Hi Smileyt

When i was reading your post i found myself agreeing and understanding alot of your feelings. Its a relief to know that i'm not alone with my feelings.

You really do need to try and keep yourself busy, some days I can't drag myself out of bed (except to sort my animals out), yesterday I decided i'd had enough of being depressed and got up and dressed (which was hard!) I did lots of jobs around the house, took my dogs for a really long walk, which made me feel loads better. I've woken this morning and again feel really down, but im going to make myself get dressed and visit my family. I often wonder whats the point and feel like i just put an act on all the time, my only reason for living at the moment is my animals.

But i believe that i'm feeling like this for a reason and that it won't last forever, its just something i have to go through to make me a better and stronger person. Thinking like this really helps me at times!

I think you should go to the Docs and do whatever you can to make yourself feel better. Im glad you've got the animals cos they really do give you the best reason for getting up in the morning.

Big hugs to you from me and my big slobbery dogs!!

Jannine x

joblessummer12

Hi smileyt and bigggggggg huggggggssssss for you. i understand completely how your feeling and it wasn't that long ago i was thinking that myself, but it does get better. please hold on to this, even if it doesnt seem it right now.

i agree with the great advice already given. But i just wanted to add if there is someone you can confide in please do. because if it wasnt for my bf and sister especially, i don't no how i would have gotten through some of my darkest days. also like you i didnt want to tell my friends, but i found that even if you dont say whats wrong, just saying im not feeling so great and need cheering up, then you'd be suprise how friends will be there for you, without having to tell them anything if that makes sense. I'm hoping this dark cloud will lift for you soon. tc x