Support for people with Depression

shazrobo

alison, hope you managed to gain some sleep eventually
shaz xxx

beachbeth

shazrobo wrote: »

evening everyone,
losing patience, sorry to here the loss of your guinea pig. i cried when ours passed last year.
part mouse, hope you feel better soon
this is my 7th night in a row without alcohol, shame i still feel rubbish tho
off to bed now, night night all
hugs
shaz xxx

Well done for doing without the alcohol. I can never seem to manage this many nights in a row. Im going to try for the next few nights though. Sorry you still feel rubbish though.

I know what you mean about the guinea pig. I always cry when ours die and I feel really silly.:o They are lovely little pets though so I suppose its understandable.

Tulip

:hello: Everyone,

Morning! I was up at 7.40am today,had breakfast,ironed my clothes,then had a bath and washed hair,then on to post office at 9am and now just waiting to go to Exeter to see my boyfriend and treat him to lunch as its his birthday today so spending most of the day with him which will be lovely.Just hope it doesnt rain heavily like yesterday,Got Boyzones new album Brother on my ipod and charged ipod and mobile phone this morning too.

Have a lovely day!

love and light,

Katie xxx

Horasio

Is there anyone I can PM? The things I need to say are things I need to say to someone I can trust, not where I could be told to pull myself together or grow a backbone or open myself up to more bullying.

I stupidly told my mother what my intentions were about my OH and she has been an uncaring bullying pig to me since Mother's Day. I need her to treat me nicely but she has reverted to being the bullying cow that she was when I was a child. Whilst I don't blame her for everything in my life, I realise why I did things when I was younger that I might not have done if she had been nicer to live with, such as marrying my OH when I was very young.

She bangs on about being nice and charitable to people, yet treats me like a pig sometimes. Of course, she can be lovely and I feel loved again but when she bullies me, I want to die. I feel she hates me and if anyone gives me the 'she is giving tough love' or they are 'excuses for not getting out' lines to me, I shall scream. I am not the sort to respond well to tough love. I became a bully myself as a result of my mothers 'tough love' and being bullied by kids at school. I learned to curb it when I moved to Scotland as I didn't feel the need to be so nasty.

I feel my choices are grim and I want to die. The only thing in my favour is I have enough money to get out and start again but I fear I am giving off an aura of 'bully me' which I gave off when I was at school and some jobs where I felt nervous, which the sadists who you always get when you feel that way will do.

I am an only child and found it difficult making friends at school due to them being in cliques and being excluded. Certain jobs had that feel as well plus most of the older females were total cows which is where I get my hatred for women of a certain age from. I got on OK with people when I wasn't at school or work. I have a fear of working in an office where I could be bullied by co-workers and/or a boss. Ironically if I feel bullied at home, I will be bullied outside.

This is why I haven't left him, as his faults are better than what the outside world could be like to me.

How can I move forward from my childlike terror? I feel about 5 years old again.

Horasio

beachbeth wrote: »

Well done for doing without the alcohol. I can never seem to manage this many nights in a row. Im going to try for the next few nights though. Sorry you still feel rubbish though.

I know what you mean about the guinea pig. I always cry when ours die and I feel really silly.:o They are lovely little pets though so I suppose its understandable.

I know what you mean about alcohol. I have put on weight since drinking more and when the lighter nights come about I find I need it less. It seems nicer in the winter.

I must admit drink is becoming less attractive to me now

beachbeth

I know what you mean, CCStar. I wouldn't have got married at such an early age if things had been nicer at home. My mum is, however, much nicer now than she used to be. I think she is mellowing with age (plus she no longer drinks which helps a lot!). I can still remember things she did and said as I was growing up though and am still hurt by it.

Feel free to pm me. I am going offline for a while now though so don't think Im ignoring you if I don't reply straight away. Ive got some sort of cold and feel dreadful. Im hoping a lie down for an hour will revive me because Im doing roast chicken for tea and I need to walk the dogs. Just hope it isn't raining by the time I get up.:(

alison99_2

shazrobo wrote: »

alison, hope you managed to gain some sleep eventually
shaz xxx

I didn't get to go back to bed, had a Drs appointment at 9am then I had to go to town and now I'm going to visit family!

Hopefully I'll have a better night tonight, but I am a very poor sleeper at the best of times, so I'm used to it now.

Alison x

Part_Mouse

Shaz

Well done on the not drinking, very proud of you

Alison

How are you feeling? lack of sleep is terrible so really feel for you.


CCStar

How are you doing?

Hows everyone else?

Well i had a mock exam today and was due back my last essay,its the final piece of corse work and the tutors lost it

x

Miroslav

Just a quick hello, hoping everyone is well. :wave:

alison99_2

Part_Mouse wrote: »

Shaz

Well done on the not drinking, very proud of you

Alison

How are you feeling? lack of sleep is terrible so really feel for you.


CCStar

How are you doing?

Hows everyone else?

Well i had a mock exam today and was due back my last essay,its the final piece of corse work and the tutors lost it

x

Hi Mouse, my sleep becomes almost non-existent when I'm really depressed, I can go days with just a couple of hours, but usually the sleeping pills help me, just not last night. I'm sure I'll catch up with it sometime.

I'm sorry to hear about your tutor losing your essay I hope they find it for you.


Hi Miroslav, hope you are well :hello:

Ok, off to watch a bit of tv, if I can find anything to watch. Have a good night all.
Alison x