Support for people with Depression

ninky_2

Raksha wrote: »

Has anyone on here got any family history of depression?

I'm adopted, but I know/have met my birth mother's family. I know my mother has to take tablets for the rest of her life for some 'mystery illness' and I've recently found out that the man I believe may be my father died from 'carbon monoxide poisoning - open verdict' (I had been told he'd emigrated to Australia, but that's another story).

depression can be as much about life circumstances as genetic predisposition. would it be helpful to you to think you might have a genetic predispostion to depression even if you didn't develop it?

people can learn depressive habits from their parents but as you have not grown up with your biological parents you won't have (even assuming either of them had depression).

i don't think there is anything to be gained from thinking you are "destined" to be depressed.

if you are worried you have depression the best person to talk to is your GP.

beachbeth

ninky wrote: »

i don't think there is anything to be gained from thinking you are "destined" to be depressed.

I don't think it will help you find a cure if you knew whether it was genetic or not. But I do think it would help if you knew that you had inherited it. I personally would feel less of a failure as a person if I knew I had been born with it. It wouldn't make me feel theres no point in trying to manage it or find a cure though.

beachbeth

Kay, it was completely wrong of that nurse to say you are overweight. How stupid can you get! I don't think you are overweight anyway!

I like the idea of talking to my dogs about my problems! They are very loving and would just gaze at me and love the attention!

ninky_2

beachbeth wrote: »

I personally would feel less of a failure as a person if I knew I had been born with it.

but having depression doesn't make you a failure as a person whether you've been born with it or whether you've developed it. would you say someone without a genetic disposition to cancer was a failure because they developed it?

environmental / life factors can make a person suffer depression. whether that's something really obvious like a partner dying or getting sacked or less obvious factors like parental influence and who your friends were at school.

every day you deal with depression you are a success.

beachbeth

Thanks for that, ninky. I think others think you are some sort of weakling because you have depression and this tends to rub off, ie. you can't cope, therefore you are weak. No one has actually said this but you feel as though this is what people think. If you could say "I was born with this and can't help it" then it wouldn't be the case.

I love your last sentence - I will remember that! Thank you so much!

losingpatience

beth thats the way I felt when I was diagnosed, that it was a sign I couldn't cope and therefore a failure, I still do feel like that some days, but my OH keeps reminding me that I'm not a failure, I'm just not very well at the moment

Didn't go for my walk tonight but have just now sat down. Came in and tidied the kitchen, put dishes away, made curry for tea so sat and had that ( ok so fair enough I did sit down to eat! ) and am now on making lots of cupcakes as I had eggs to use up. Have made 36 in total! a variety of vanilla and chocolate. Some I will decorate with vanilla buttercream chocolate chips and mini marshmallows, others with chocolate buttercream and chocolate sprinkles nom nom nom. Going to take them into work tomorrow so I'll be a popular person tomorrow lol Trying to keep myself busy in the hopes it will tire me out so I'll sleep!

Ovens beeping at me so best go get the cakes out

lp x

ninky_2

well done on the cupcakes losingpatience. i could do with one now.

i'll repeat again because i think it is worth saying. depression is not a failure it is an illness. unfortunately some people don't realise this because the symptoms of depression can come across as laziness when they are not.

i've had depression a couple of times. once when a relationship ended and i was living overseas away from my usual support network and once when i was pregnant (the pregnancy ended in miscarriage and the depression actually lifted at the time the foetus stopped developing so pretty sure it was hormonal). i can honestly say that things like deciding what to have for breakfast or getting dressed in the morning were more taxing and arduous and bigger 'achievements' than the things i can now cope with in a fairly stressful job. i actually think i have points of extreme 'laziness' now - and let myself enjoy them.

please don't feel a failure because from a point of wellness i understand how hard depression can make everything and it becomes physical as well as emotional.

LadyMorticia

losingpatience wrote: »

beth thats the way I felt when I was diagnosed, that it was a sign I couldn't cope and therefore a failure, I still do feel like that some days, but my OH keeps reminding me that I'm not a failure, I'm just not very well at the moment

Didn't go for my walk tonight but have just now sat down. Came in and tidied the kitchen, put dishes away, made curry for tea so sat and had that ( ok so fair enough I did sit down to eat! ) and am now on making lots of cupcakes as I had eggs to use up. Have made 36 in total! a variety of vanilla and chocolate. Some I will decorate with vanilla buttercream chocolate chips and mini marshmallows, others with chocolate buttercream and chocolate sprinkles nom nom nom. Going to take them into work tomorrow so I'll be a popular person tomorrow lol Trying to keep myself busy in the hopes it will tire me out so I'll sleep!

Ovens beeping at me so best go get the cakes out

lp x

I bet your kitchen smelt yummy!

I love cupcakes.

losingpatience

Yup I love the smell of cakes when they're baking

The bf just wondered into the kitchen and said bliddy hell how many are you making ( then asked when he could pinch one! )

Most of them are decorated now should do it more often, I find it so therapeutic and relaxing!

Cupcakes all round :T

sandy71

Evening.
Can you stop talking about cupcakes now it's making me really want one but all I can find in the house are some very soft party rings:(

Raksha, I don't know if I have a family history of depression (SSsshhhh we don't talk about that sort of thing!!) but I can go back to the trigger and the point where it got worse to the point of suicide.

As for the talking to pets, my cat was great for that, she just sat there looking at me and purred, I miss her so much:(
My dog will either jump on your head or fart and walk off:rotfl: