How do you accept you have slow learning kids?

sooty&sweep

Hi

I've not read the entire post so apologies if I'm covering old ground.

My son is 8 & in year 3. His teachers assessments have always been clearly a bright little boy, good at numeracy not great at reading and writing.
During year 2 he was assessed by the school's SENCO who identified a learning difficulty. They don't like to label so they aren't saying he's dyslexic but he has signs of dyslexia. So intellectually he is bright but he does have difficulty reading and writing.
They're adjusting the way he records things in class so writing only if thats the point. The teacher will scribe for him if writing isn't the point. He's also getting additional support from the SENCO.

Have you had your school age chid assessed to check he doesn't have a learning difficulty ?
From my experience I suspect there are alot of children who need some particular support that aren't being picked up. I certainly didn't expect my son to need additional support.

Jen

modgit

Hi
similar situation here. DS1 gifted and talented. DS2 not interested in learning, slow to speak etc. In year 1 he was taken out the main class for "extra help" in literacy and reading. He could barely write or read.
By term 2 of year 2 he was flying ahead and now reads on average 5 books a week, he just learnt at his time! He needed to be that little bit older to encompass formal education. In his literacy he got level 3's at year 2!
His maths on the other hand......!
I'm sure your DS will catch up soon.

mrs_pokemon

I have 3 boys and they are all so different,my 9 yr old struggles with academic work but is an amazing artist and has a brilliant imagination.
My 7 yr old is the classic all rounder although very good at description and art.
I have a feeling my 4 yr old will not thrive in the school environment,just due to immaturity ,we are in scotland as he has only turned 4 he can wait a year.
The longer children,esp boys can stay at home the better.
They neeed time to adapt to the world of regimented schooling.

HairyHandofDartmoor

I really understand how you feel here. Myself and DH are both university educated and intelligent, and assumed our children would do well at school.

DD did well, was in A sets and now at grammar school. However, DS1 and DS2 were an entirely different story. Slow to learn to read and write, lacking in concentration, they were in the C set for literacy in the case of DS1, and the C set for everything in the case of DS2.

After initial surprise and disappointment (which we tried very hard not to communicate to them) we decided that they were both intelligent children (you could tell by their speech and imaginative ideas that they were intelligent) and that given time they would catch up with the other children.

I'm pleased to say that this is largely the case. DS1 is at comprehensive school doing well, he has really caught up, and DS2, whilst still in the C sets for literacy and maths is right at the top of the C sets (rather than the bottom as previously) and is now in the B set for Science.

Without pressure from us, they have found their feet and caught up with their peers. I believe that they were slow developers (DH says he was the same) and just needed to develop in their own time and at their own pace.

I'm not at all worried about them now. They are lovely, sensible children and I feel sure they have a good future ahead of them.

Hopefully your children will be the same in time!

mum.s

I have been given a book called, Suceed in exams and Triumph in tests, it says the book is for parents who want their children to enjoy school, enjoy childhood, triumph in test, discover the excitement of working at something that takes effort etc, I'm enjoying reading the book, I think it has some good advice in it, but it aslo has a relaxation section, I read this section to my DS every night just after he has finished reading his comic, I alternate the realxation stories each night and he goes to sleep very quickly, he says it makes him relaxed, calm and he does seem more positive and relaxed the next day. I have also been able to use a few techniques when playing games, going through a list of what he knows and what i thought he knew.
Hope this helps to.

mum.s

I have been given a book called, Suceed in exams and Triumph in tests, it says the book is for parents who want their children to enjoy school, enjoy childhood, triumph in test, discover the excitement of working at something that takes effort etc, I'm enjoying reading the book, I think it has some good advice in it, but it aslo has a relaxation section, I read this section to my DS every night just after he has finished reading his comic, I alternate the realxation stories each night and he goes to sleep very quickly, he says it makes him relaxed, calm and he does seem more positive and relaxed the next day. I have also been able to use a few techniques when playing games, going through a list of what he knows and what i thought he knew.
Hope this helps to.;)

Bitsy_Beans

You have my sympathy as when I feel fed up and frustrated this is my feeling, like I've failed my son.
He's very bright but when it comes to all things emotional and social I think he lags waaaaaaaaay behind. He didn't speak until after the age of two and even now at 3 1/2 he's so far behind his peers that Early Years Special Needs are investigating. i try and tell myself that it's OK to be different (better in fact) but I find it hard when people who don't know my son try to engage him in conversation and they get no reaction or they can't understand him. I feel like I should out a sign round his neck saying he won't respond. And then I feel guilty for feeling like I should point this out to people.

Kids develop in their own way and I guess my son will get there in the end. Yours will too. As someone who was academic at school I can say it's not necessarily the be all and end all of life. Perhaps my son will develop a skill rather than a list of qualifications - who knows. I don't intend to pressure him either way.

mum.s

Thought this may also help, I have looked up the book I am reading called Succeed in exams, Truimph in test by the authors Jean Robb and Hilary Letts and they have written other books to:

Creating Kids who can concentrate.
Creating Motivated Kids.
Creating Kids Who Can.
Enjoy Your Teenagers.

vic1

I haven't read all the thread but as a mother of 2 and a grandmother i feel that each and every child has an area in which they shine - it may not be academic but it may be artistic or practical and the world needs all these different types - so long as a child is intrested in something whatever it maybe he will learn . my OH is severly dyslexic but can pull an engine apart and leave it for a year then put it back together - he can build engines from bits of engines and does the calculations in his head. your sons intelligence may just have a different focus to your own - find it and celebrate it. if we were all the same life would be boring .