Negative Paternity Test

monicaj

blue_monkey wrote: »

Did your husband get PR through the courts? Would they then take this away from him after all this time if he is not the boys father after all.

My husband is named on the Birth Certificate as they were married at the time. One of the many questions we have for the solicitor is: If she does not agree to a CSA/Court recognised DNA test, it is likely that hubby would need to go to the courts with the evidence he has. As we understand it, if she still refuses they can assume that he is not the father. This is where it gets horrid and scary, will he then be giving up PR with a declartation of non parentage - I somehow think he will ??

amersall

monicaj wrote: »

Thank you so much for sharing this. It certainly gives us some hope that the mother will agree to my husband maintaining his relationship with his son and her being "sensible" about the best solution for the child - only time will tell. We have had similar thoughts on putting money into his savings - but at the back of our minds we have this "if you don't pay, you don't see" scenario. Horrible, horrible ..............

i would put money into a seperate savings for him, at least his mum wont get her hands on it. when the child is old enough he will make his own mind up. if he wants to see his dad.he will, do you think if he wanted to see his dad badly his mum wouldnt stop him seeing him?

monicaj

amersall wrote: »

if he wants to see his dad.he will, do you think if he wanted to see his dad badly his mum wouldnt stop him seeing him?

Hi

I sincerely hope not, but the truth is that yes I do think she would stop him seeing his "dad". I may be wrong, but her actions over the years have demonstrated that she has no respect of my husband's role as "dad" maybe because she's known all along - who knows? He has over the past 6 months been calling his stepdad "dad" and says he is his "special dad" . This has always upset us more so because my husband has always been part of his life, never a contact missed etc etc etc. I don't know if that's what happens with stepchildren. My children have NEVER called anyone Dad except their father - I wouldn't have it any other way - but that's me.

monicaj

Hawkmoon69 wrote: »

Oh right, and what would you tell the poor kid who just discovered his 'dad' dont want to know him any more and wants a refund on his childhood?

Few! what a lucky escape for you!

Sad, very, very sad.

My heart goes out to this kid. He doesn't deserve this any more that his 'father' but i bet that bond can never be broken because bringing up a child regargless of paternity forges bonds that cannot be broken. When this kid grows up who is he gonna call dad? who will his kids call grandad? We all know the answer to this.

Good luck

Sad, very very sad when your mother deceives you into believing that someone is your father

Sad, very, very sad when you have been the victim of Paternity Fraud to the tune of £30k and that you could have been screwed for another £30k over the next 6 to 9 years !!

DeeDee74

very sad indeed and it's good to see that the father even though not the biological one isn't gona just drop all contact with the child.
im sure many men would..

i really do feel for you both and hope it all works out
dee x

Hawkmoon69

Zara33 wrote: »

Incase you missed the post :rolleyes: don't let that stop you getting up there on your high horse though eh!

High horse? Me?

Read my post again and look at the quote and you will see I was refering to pd001's comment on demanding the cash back instantly. This thread was not merely about money but also the feelings of the boy and his 'dad' who wish to continue seeing each other. The thread was looking for advice not flippant comments.

I had not missed any posts on this thread.

You may apologise once you have dismounted.

Hawkmoon69

monicaj wrote: »

Sad, very very sad when your mother deceives you into believing that someone is your father

Sad, very, very sad when you have been the victim of Paternity Fraud to the tune of £30k and that you could have been screwed for another £30k over the next 6 to 9 years !!

Another person misquoting me. Please look at my original post and see that it was directed at pd001 for the flippant remark.

So that makes you very sad inded my friend. I am in this very situation myself but have decided not to go for paternity tests as the relationship i have with my 'daughter' is something I cherrish an do not wish to be blighted by DNA testing. I have brought her up as my own and nothing will change my feelings for her. I will never truly know if she is mine or not but it is not something I feel needs to be addressed.

You may also apologise when you are ready.

pd001

monicaj wrote: »

Sad, very very sad when your mother deceives you into believing that someone is your father

Sad, very, very sad when you have been the victim of Paternity Fraud to the tune of £30k and that you could have been screwed for another £30k over the next 6 to 9 years !!

I agree with you wholeheartedly here, good luck in whatever you choose to do

pd001

Hawkmoon69 wrote: »

Another person misquoting me. Please look at my original post and see that it was directed at pd001 for the flippant remark.

So that makes you very sad inded my friend. I am in this very situation myself but have decided not to go for paternity tests as the relationship i have with my 'daughter' is something I cherrish an do not wish to be blighted by DNA testing. I have brought her up as my own and nothing will change my feelings for her. I will never truly know if she is mine or not but it is not something I feel needs to be addressed.

You may also apologise when you are ready.

It was not a flippant remark at all. I would most certainly want every penny back...with interest!

I meant every word of it

monicaj

Hawkmoon69 wrote: »

Another person misquoting me. Please look at my original post and see that it was directed at pd001 for the flippant remark.

So that makes you very sad inded my friend. I am in this very situation myself but have decided not to go for paternity tests as the relationship i have with my 'daughter' is something I cherrish an do not wish to be blighted by DNA testing. I have brought her up as my own and nothing will change my feelings for her. I will never truly know if she is mine or not but it is not something I feel needs to be addressed.

You may also apologise when you are ready.

I don't feel in the mood to apologise to anyone right now and this is the only thing I will apologise for. I respect your choice to do nothing, such a shame you hadn't mentioned your own situation in your first posting it may have taken the "sting" out.

We made the most difficult decision in our lives, I hope yours is the right one for your daughter.