Black Dog of Depression - can we help each other?

dane-katie

Pipkin thanks yeah something is finally getting done, i was sick of being fobbed off and doctor i saw is fab, glad he is only one who will see me now lol

Feeling great, just be happy when things are going right again.

I feel for you so much i have problems in my head but still fully able, im sure it must get frustrating for you, im sending my hugs

whitevanwoman

LameWolf wrote: »

Whitevanwoman I understand your reluctance to go into hospital - I'd feel the same, I think. Can I ask what animals you have? This is purely [STRIKE]nosiness[/STRIKE] interest on my part, as I love animals.:o

Here's the terrible two, my very own black dog and cheeky Miss Tibby Tabby who likes to curl up with him and lick his nose


Black dog is half working sheepdog, quarter staffy bull terrier and quarter labrador (I think), but he licks, eats and swims like a full labrador, bounces off stone walls chasing after his tennis ball (thanks to his staffy solid head) and has got the collie brain which has meant he figured out how to open the fridge door. A more lovable affectionate rogue you couldn't hope to meet. His enthusiasm for life (in particular for food and tennis balls and children) has been what has got me through some very dark times.

It's now looking like I'm not going to have to go into hospital as they accept it would cause me too much anxiety and stress and wouldn't be beneficial so crisis team is coming in daily and they are trying me with different meds.

Chin up everyone, black dog sends woofs, licks and big hugs and cuddles (which he is very good at) to all who need them x

LameWolf

Awww Whitevanwoman they are absolutely gorgeous! Thanks for posting the piccy. I'm betting that they make it somewhat easier for you on your worst days - that's the thing about animals, the don't judge us, and they know when we're not feeling right.

Dane-katie I'm so glad you managed to get the GP to finally listen. It can feel like banging your head on a brick wall sometimes! Good luck, and I hope the psychiatrist they refer you to is a good one.

Pipkin yes, my hands are an absolute nightmare in the mornings. I have one of these http://shop.camra.org.uk/DisplayDetail.aspx?prodid=170&secid=20 on the top of my bedside cabinet, to try and get the old paws going before I get up, but I fear I'm fighting a losing battle. They do improve a bit during the day, but they're never really right. I get so fed up with it, as I can't do half the things I used to be able to.

Black paw LOL at blaming the keyboard! My usual answer is that I washed my fingers this morning and now I can't do a thing with them!:D

System

arg

have spent the last week (or is it two now?) in bed all day. I have no energy. There's nothing for me to do. There's no point in me getting up. Bf had to tell me i needed a shower last night which just made me feel worse (i know he's only looking out for me but still). I have nothing to look forward to. Unless you count my doctors appointment next week. Which isn't really something to look forward to.

i feel like im stuck in a rut with my meds, they dont seem to be helping, but i dont really want to increase the dosage unless i have to. have to wait till monday to ring up and find out where i am in the referral process for CBT. Last time i spoke to someone they said i was "half way through" and i was referred in june

i really feel like i need a social worker. there are things i'm struggling with that i think if i had one, they could help me with. or just any other support. aside from 3 monthly appointments with the psychiatrist and my GP i have no other support. and i'm getting no support with my BPD. they seem just focused on sorting out the depression but if theres one things i've noticed its the BPD which has been worse the last few weeks.

sorry guys, i'm rambelling.

{{{{HUGS}}}}} for all

LameWolf

MessedUp I feel like that some days - that there's no point in bothering to get up. You know what? - I feel worse if I don't get up!

I agree you need something to look forward to. I don't know what sort of things interest you, so I can't really make suggestions, but even a little thing can make a difference.

My next "outing" will be Saturday when Mr LW has to visit the dentist (yeah, fun! Not! ) and we'll go straight on to the market to get some fruit'n'veg. Doesn't sound exciting, but it's a change from the same four walls.

Anyway. my point is that maybe you and your b/f can put your heads together and come up with something that you'll get a bit of enjoyment from, so that there's something good in the near future.

(Sorry, I'm rambling a bit - brain's not fully functional today, but I hope you can get what I mean).

Tell your GP you feel you need a social worker. Surely they can refer you? Not something I know about, but I'd have thought they could.

whitevanwoman

Hi Messed up

Sorry you are so low, I know what you mean though, I'm struggling with self-care at the moment too, which is why they have suggested hospital admission.

Your GP can refer you to the community mental health team who have social workers - allegedly - I've never been visited by a social worker despite the fact that I'm struggling with looking after myself, and not being able to go out for days or weeks at a time so shopping is a problem. I do think however that services are so stretched that access to these services is limited to those in absolute desperate need, or where children or learning disabilities are involved. It might be different in your area though, and it is definitely worth talking to your GP and asking for a referral to the CMHT for support. I'm not sure how much practical support they will be able to offer but it is someone you can talk to, and sometimes, it can be good to have an objective realistic point of view about something that you are worried or stressed about. They could also help talk to your bf so that he has a better understanding of the problems and how to help.

I've had a BPD diagnosis too (amongst other things), and was told that they are not going to try to treat that, just to deal with the major symptoms of depression and anxiety :mad: I felt so angry and let down when I was told that but have since realised that actually there isn't alot more than that that can be done.

CBT helped me, but didn't last for long enough - that's the problem but I've now been rereferred. Over the years I've learned that you really do have to shout loudly about what you think you need, otherwise you get overlooked and labelled as "coping" and so become low priority. Unfortunately, that's one of the hardest things for someone with low self-esteem and severe depression to do but somehow you have to find the strength to do it.

If you are on meds, talk to your GP about perhaps trying an alternative med, as some work better than others and everyone reacts differently. It takes time to monitor the effects of meds, and sometimes a med you've been on for a while can just suddenly stop being effective.

The most useful form of support for me has been this forum - there are a couple of other supportive threads for people with depression and people have given me alot of support and practical advice. Without MSE, I simply don't know how I would get through the days at the moment. And your personal experiences of living with depression might help someone else, even if it just to make them feel less alone.

skipsmum

hi,
im just out of hospital having had severe depression. Just looking for a safe place to check into, and MSE has always been my forum for everything I need to know so I feel comfortable here.
Thanks XX

System

LameWolf & whitevanwoman-thank you for your kind and encouraging replies. Going to set myself the task of getting out of bed, dressed and walking to the supermarket. That doesn't sound like much when i read it back but its effort for me!

skipsmum-welcome to the thread,i hope you can find support here as others have done

LameWolf

MessedUp Well done - baby steps to start with; getting out of bed, dressed and out of the house is a good start. Don't forget to check in and let us know how you get on.

Skipsmum Welcome. It's a safe place here, and we're happy to have you on board.

As usual, I'll probably be offline over the weekend - busy doing the tasks I need Mr LW's help with - so have a good weekend, everyone.

pipkin71

Well done MessedUp. Starting slowly is the way to go, and even if it doesn't sound like much, it will be an achievement for you, so work towards that.

Good luck