Black Dog of Depression - can we help each other?

Careful_with_that_Axe

I've been lurking, just not posting. Crazy-girl, I beg you to think of the people you will leave behind. You have no idea how much you will be missed and how you will leave a hole in peoples lives. Can I ask you to talk to the Samaritans or someone about this plan?
If you must have this plan to feel safe, hold in in your mind but every day whan you get up, say "Not today". You can still have the plan, just not implement it.
I can promise you it won't always be like this for you. Life will improve.

sandy71

crazy_girl wrote: »

i should have just kept my mouth shut

No you shouldn't, hopefully you will see how many people care for you.

Please keep talking to us, I wish I had.

crazy_girl

ive talked to friends, my husband, my doc and my psychotherapist, it hasnt changed anything and like i said no ones done anything

crazy_girl

obviously they cant legally tell you to go ahead and do it but ive worked it out that theyre not doing owt becuase its actually the best way for me, im probably incurable and they cant really justify another 60-odd years of me being a burden on the NHS, tax credits and DLA

sandy71

I felt the same, no one cares, no one is listening and they want me to do it. I have since found out that they were listening but everyone thought someone else was dealing with it. Choose one person and tell them you are serious and want help.
What do you want them to do? Think it all through and demand help.

jazabelle

I honestly don't think they are thinking that way - they probably stupidly didn't think you meant it. Please listen to sandy and make them listen. It's nothing to do with them thinking you are incurable or a burden, because you are neither of those things.

Rachel021967

Crazy girl do you want to die or are you so frustrated that nobody is listening and nothings changing? Have you stopped your meds?

crazy_girl

why would i say something like that lightly? ive wanted to do it once before and i od'd, i went into hospital and the consultant said it was a stupid way to kill yourself as taking 60 paracetamols just kills you slowly over a few days, she said chose something more effective next time. that was 6 years ago, ive held out so long and nothing has changed, i think im in fact worse than i ever was, i certainly have more conditions its like im collecting them. i wont be taking paracetamols again!

crazy_girl

i want to die, ive come to teh conculsion that whichever way you look at it its best for everyone, including me. i should think thats a choice im entitled to make if i want.

ive ran out of my tablets but they dont do anythign anyway, im fed up of paying for them, its a waste of money.

Rachel021967

Sorry I wasn't trying to say that you didn't mean it its just that you sound so angry.
I find that when I stop my antidepressants and/or Lithium I become suicidal. Please talk to somebody. I find SaneLine the best. https://www.sane.org.uk (might need to drop the uk). I'll be back with the number in a minute. Please hang in there. I've read some of your past posts and you sound such a kind and caring person that you would be greatly missed by your loved ones and people on here as well.