gay civil rights ceremoney

ladywood

Al_Mac wrote:

Haven't read the whole thread.

I don't think I would want to go to one. I just think it is wrong.

Won't be inviting you then. :rolleyes:

Al_Mac wrote:

However I was told this could be done between parent and child! To facilitate inheritance.

Anyone else heard this?

No it can't be done between parent and child. There was some talk when the law was first discussed about whether there should be a section for general partnerships (which might be where this came from) but in the end they stuck to the main purpose - partnership rights for same sex couples.

freebie_junkie

ladywood wrote:

Freebie_junkie - I didn't mean you were prejudiced - I imagine as a Romany you probably understand prejudice more than most...

oh i got confused, sorry. (my dad will be so happy you did that witha capital 'R'! he wears a t-shirt stating as such!) hehe!

Sarahsaver

A lot of heterosexual couples get married in Church with no real religious conviction. I think THAT is wrong;)

freebie_junkie

i definately agree on that! it makes me proper mad!

Tondella

Hi, interesting discussion, for me I don't find anything offensive about according the same civil rights to a same sex partnership as to a heterosexual partnership, however that wan't what you asked for.

Clearly there are issues aside from the same sex coupling that are angering you, such as the previous behaviour of this sister in law not attending your wedding, etc.

I think you need to sit down with yourself and work out what exactly it is that you object to in the partnership, and how strongly you feel about it, then weigh that against the distress it is causing in your wife's family. If this ceremony really will cause you moral distress then you will just have to take the flack from the family. If your objections are not too strong to be suppressed for the sake of your wife etc then you should go. There's no easy solution here, as in many things in life, none of the options are palatable. I would just say that if you do go then you really should hold back on any objections you have and try and keep the day civil. Then at least you can claim the moral high ground over your sister in law's previous behaviour.

mdeebee

In situations like this, I think it is wise to remember that just because you don't agree with something, doesn't mean that it's "wrong". Who decides what it "right" and "wrong"? Using what standards?

My experience has taught me, over the vast span on 37 years, that people should be able to left alone to live their lives. Gay, straight, not sure, or whatever, why don't we let people get on with life? If people are happy, I day just let them get on with their lives and be happy.

In the end, there are two options:

go; or
don't go

The choice is yours.

Gingham_Ribbon

Well, I can see this from 2 points of view. On the one hand, I would support my husband and if he wanted me to go (for the sake of the family and for his sake) to an event that I did not want to attend, I would do it because I love him and he would do the same for me.

From another point of view, my SIL refused to come to our wedding because it was in a Catholic church. I was glad she didn't come as I didn't want anyone there who couldn't wish me well.

The point of view I'm struggling with is how on earth anyone can have a problem with celebrating 2 people's love for each other, and particularly how they can have a problem with their children seeing that love.

And for the record, I'm a Catholic.

freebie_junkie

Al_Mac wrote:

I don't think I would want to go to one. I just think it is wrong.

QUOTE]

do you know why you think its wrong?

Barcode

trademark wrote:

i am however against adoption for same sex couples and feel it could lead to this and then id be assisting as such

You are not required to endorse an individuals choices; but I do think if you had any interest in displaying good social graces, and more importantly, respect for your wife (since her sister is no doubt very important to her) then you would put aside your differences for a couple of hours.

Last summer, I attended a full-on Catholic wedding, you know, the wedding mass, communion and all the rituals. My personal belief is that this is superstituous nonsense; but the people getting married were good friends of my partner. It would have upset my partner had I refused to attend. And guess what? I actually enjoyed it - from a curious point of view. The couple getting married are really nice people, and I don't see a need to make judgements about something that was obviously very important to them.

If the issue is more about the sisters past attitude, perhaps you can agree to disagree for one day. You're acting like it is some huge imposition upon you to go, when to be blunt, your feelings don't enter into the equation (much). Go, support your wife, show the sister you don't harbour bad feelings and try and have a good time.

margaretclare

Gingham_Ribbon wrote:

Well, I can see this from 2 points of view. On the one hand, I would support my husband and if he wanted me to go (for the sake of the family and for his sake) to an event that I did not want to attend, I would do it because I love him and he would do the same for me.

From another point of view, my SIL refused to come to our wedding because it was in a Catholic church. I was glad she didn't come as I didn't want anyone there who couldn't wish me well.

I had my ear bent by my brother-in-law. He made a point of telling me that his bro had been married 3 times, he'd never been to any of the weddings, the first 2 were in a register office and he couldn't have come to ours because it was in a church, and it was against his principles to enter any church (even our simple friendly little Methodist Church!)

That was fine, we didn't want him there. Anyone who comes to an occasion whether wedding, funeral, christening, bar mitzvah or whatever, should be able to behave with dignity and politeness for the short time required - 1 to 2 hours usually. It costs nothing to put on a smile, be friendly and to wish people well.

Aunty Margaret