The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 2

Imelda

Hello all,

I have been a member here for a long time and used to be a regular poster while a DFW! I still lurk from time to time and only today stumbled upon your thread.

I firstly want to say a massive well done to all of you, the support on here is absolutely fantastic.

If you had asked me even a week ago if I had a problem with alcohol I would have laughed in your face, but, a conversation with my husband has led me to realise that actually- I think I do.

Now, going without alcohol day to day is not a problem, I rarely drink at home and never on my own. I am a social drinker, meeting up with friends and family revolves around drinking. However, I just don't seem to know when to stop. Sometimes I have one or two glasses of wine and then switch to soft drinks, but others it seems like I am on a mission to get completely and utterly obliterated (not intentionally, it's like a switch has been flicked in my brain). This leads to problems with friends and family (my husband is a saint for putting up with me), my work suffers and I frequently injure myself while in such a state.

I am not a teenager, I am intelligent, have a successful career and a wonderful family- my life is pretty much perfect. But it seems that I am intent on destroying it with my drinking binges.

I need to be able to control it, I think the only way to go might be to give up completely but my husband says this is unnecessary. What do you guys think? Is it easy as that- "just cut down"?

Sorry I have rambled on xx

Miss_Piggy_2

Afternoon all

Another AFD for me yesterday. Not sure what that makes my total

Winebox Can you put me down for a full AFF please?

Polaroid I must admit I like my list of reasons to stop drinking. Makes me realise how much drinking does affect my day to day life.

Well, I've been to Walmart and done my shopping and walked straight past the alcohol aisles. Very proud of myself.

Following on from GC, biscotte and Jo1972's posts, I certainly do believe that alcoholism is genetic. There are a lot of alcoholics on my Mums side and she admits herself she drank a lot when she was my age. She now drinks very seldom and is quite anti-drinking after seeing the affects its had on members of her family. My Dads family features drinkers but none I would consider alcoholics. However, my Dad does like a drink most nights...just a glass of wine or two. So there was no hope for me!

Luckily my OH is teetotal so I'm hoping my little boy grows up with a balanced attitude towards drink. I certainly don't want him growing up to see his Mum getting hammered on a regular basis.

Anyway, another AFD today and for the rest of January (fingers crossed)

Hope everyone else is ok

Miss P
xx

Miss_Piggy_2

Hi Imelda

Welcome to the thread. I think its great...non judgmental and very supportive.

I can empathise with where you're coming from. I also have days where my aim seems to be to get completely and utterly slaughtered. I always feel rubbish the next day and end up apologising to my husband.

Its great your husband wants to support you in cutting down. Only you can decide whether cutting down or stopping completely is the way to go for you. I must admit, I've tried the cutting down this month and it just hasn't worked for me. So I'm going for abstinence. Like I say, its up to you to decide which is achievable for you.

One thing you can count on though is that you will receive a whole lot of support on here. Why not join the Alcohol free February challenge? You can state how many days you intend to be alcohol free and Winebox will be keeping a tally.

Miss P
xx

115K

:hello: to Imelda.

AF day for me today so 15/28 Lurkio please, more than half at least.:j

I hope you're all okay.:A

Imelda

Thanks Miss Piggy,

To be honest I think the idea of cutting down scares me a little! I just don't seem to be able to stop drinking once I have had two or three- so in my mind I should just not drink anything. But I know the issue isn't there when we have a meal at the weekend as we will, at most, share a bottle of wine.

So, I think I am going to limit myself to drinking wine, with a meal and only at weekends (with one exception for my husband's birthday next month which falls on a week night).

I have consulted my calendar and that means I will have 21 AF days out of 28 BUT on the non-AF days I will limit myself to a maximum of 2 average glasses/ half a bottle of wine.

This probably seems a lot but it will mean not drinking at over half the social events planned in Feb. Next week alone I have two meals out with friends that would usually mean a bottle of wine at least on each occasion, I will NOT drink at them at all.

Then I have a weekend at the in laws- that will be a challenge!


Thanks again xx

maman

I'm not sure about this genetic thing at all. All my family (both sides) were teetotal Methodists until my dad. He wasn't an alcoholic but he liked a drink most days so I think it may be nurture rather than nature in my case. Also, especially for women, there have been huge social changes in the past few decades. It wasn't that long ago when women weren't really welcome in pubs (certainly not without a male escort), when no-one really drank wine (foreign holidays have encouraged that I think) and many families only had booze in the house at Christmas. How times have changed!

winebox

:eek: :eek: :eek: so much to do in Feb - is good!!! Will try & post 1st listing of targets in work tomorrow (not as busy as at home ) panicking a bit at how many to keep track of but on the other hand it's brilliant that so many are up for it. Thoughts are: target AFDs / actual AFDs / money saved / alch units saved, if I can manage it. No worries if you don't want to bother with all that, it's just that wealth & health are my main motivators!

Bis / MP - can I include you both at 28/28?

If anyone wants to do targets of days out of 7 or 14 instead of 28 I'll try & cope (wipes sweat from brow).

Had a mate over today who cuts my hair - convo turned to diets / weight /wine / fitness as per usual...I told her I'd had 11 AF days in Jan & she was GOBSMACKED! (We had some today so not AF today) I said how I'd found "a website" & we'd all set targets & how I'd failed at mine but would give it another / better go in Feb...but she just couldn't believe I'd had as many AF days as I have (she's one of my few confidantes with alch consumption....) & actually said she'd thought as soon as she saw me that my skin looked brighter & now she knew why! That is HUGELY ENCOURAGING, considering I have / will have had so many alcoholic days in the month. Have always hated Feb worst month of the year, now I say bring it on! I coldn't bring myself to tell her where we are (selfish?) - just a bit too close to home somehow. Anyway, she's going to have a go too, tho insists on 1 daily drink so no AFDs! (as I said, each to their own....).

Maman pls do not apologise for "pathetic" targets, see above, we're each on our own path.

aaaargh! Danielle is Ronnie's daughter???? How do you know? Is it true? Am I thick?

winebox

oh forgot to mention the genetics thing - fascinating stuff - so far I am the only person I know of (.....) in my family who has a problem...I'm one of 5, Dad was one of 10, so very large family, never even heard rumours. Most certainly not knocking the theory, just hoping I'm not the start of a long chain of behaviour....

winebox

:hello: Jo - good to "hear your voice" as it were!

the_rugby_coach

jo1972 wrote: »

TRC, I am interested to watch your progress, you sound very strong at the moment! Good luck

Thanks Jo. I do feel positive which, if I am honest surprises me :rolleyes: .

In a way I think February will be harder than January, Being allowed to drink in moderation may become more blurred than cutting out completely.

Time will tell...

TRC