Abuse or Not?

yoni_one

Regardless of how genuine the OP is, if this thread raises awareness of where male targets can gain support for domestic violence and abuse then that can't be a bad thing.

Someone could find support they need through a thread such as this and I sincerely hope no-one is put off asking for it by what comes across as people bullying someone just because they don't believe he is sincere.

alwaysonthego_2

yoni_one wrote: »

Regardless of how genuine the OP is, if this thread raises awareness of where male targets can gain support for domestic violence and abuse then that can't be a bad thing.

Someone could find support they need through a thread such as this and I sincerely hope no-one is put off asking for it by what comes across as people bullying someone just because they don't believe he is sincere.

no it does not, it does the opposite!!! The op tells a completely OTT story that takes the mick out of men. It is so obvious that it is a mickey take and this will put men who are in a genuine abuse situation off posting. If you want to raise awareness of dv this thread is not the correct place to do so!!

Edinburghlass_2

MrsE wrote: »

I agree, if its a joker or you think its a joker, than ignore, its the best way to respond. But if its genuine then these responses are very harsh like they were to BROKEN HEARTED.

I'm also shocked that two board guides are joining in the micky taking of this OP:eek: :eek: :eek:

All of my posts have the report button on them the same as everyone else, if you have a problem then use it.

yoni_one

alwaysonthego wrote: »

no it does not, it does the opposite!!! The op tells a completely OTT story that takes the mick out of men. It is so obvious that it is a mickey take and this will put men who are in a genuine abuse situation off posting. If you want to raise awareness of dv this thread is not the correct place to do so!!

I disagree with some of what you have said. Within this thread I have posted a link to an organisation where male targets of abuse can access support. It is appropriate to post it in this thread because the nature of it is about male targets of domestic abuse, regardless of how sincere the OP is.

I very much doubt a man in a genuine abuse situation would be put off posting simply by reading the OP's post, however some of the abusive replies might well see him off.

If it turns out that the OP's claim are false then so be it. But understand it will be the nature of the response he gets that will more greatly influence someone who is undecided about coming to this forum for support.

abby1234519

I'm sorry but it doesn't matter what form abuse comes in its still abuse...whether its taunting someone or something similar.

I have literally just left a relationship because I was constantly made to feel like I couldn't do anything right, I was told I was a liar, that I was useless and that I was pathetic and that I needed to grow up. I was told I didn't do anything around the house, that I was on my laptop all day, that I didn't work hard and that people didn't like me. THAT to me was mental abuse. I don't lie, I do clean the house, I do all the laundry thank you very much, to be told noone likes me, well that was rather crushing. To be told I didn't work hard when in fact I earn more than he does when he hass been in the workforce 8 years longer than I and I have only been doing this job for 5 months, I think I have worked hard thank you very much to get to that position.

The point is, this is no means in the same league as physical abuse, or anything like the abuse men and women suffer from their partners, however I have suffered. I've spent a year of my life feeling I wasn't worth anything and being too scared of being alone to leave. So really to say that the OP's experience makes you feel sick, well when is anyones situation EVER the same?

I do agree, if he is a troll then I am disgusted,but if not, then to jump at him in an hour of need is distasteful.

Loopy_Girl

He was told from the outset to dump her and seek financial advice. What was he expecting? The forum to troop round and tell her her behaviour was odd and to stop it?

Reading between the lines (should it be true) he is keeching it that he has, after being together for 10 whole months, put her on his mortgage and credit cards. And if he has been a user on here for 12 months then he would know that would be a very foolish thing to do. Actually anyone with half a brain would know not to do that.

If this was a female 'abusee' then I am sure she would get told the same. Thing is, I don't see why he felt it neccesary to tell us about the Branston Pickle and having a bath with the Yorkie? Surely the fact his life and his dog were put in danger would have been ample and I think it it the former examples that have got alarm bells ringing.

He asked for advice and was told it on several occasions - what more was he looking for?

yoni_one

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

He asked for advice and was told it on several occasions - what more was he looking for?

I don't understand what your point is with regards to the abusive replies on this thread?

Loopy_Girl

Do you know what chuckles me sometimes - people that all full of indignation for things that people type on here. It's an unmoderated public forum and people are entitled to say what they wish. If you see some of the posts as 'abusive' then that is, of course, your perogative and you have the free right to report any posts that are abusive in your eyes.

Just like people have the free right to type what they wish. You come into the lion's den posting on this board and you can't (and he should know this since he has been a long term user) expect everyone to agree or even take you serious.

He was told what to do and has yet came back today and said he got no help (??) and has flounced off in indignation. You air your dirty laundry on a public forum and you take your chances.

abby1234519

But neither do people need to spend 4 pages making fun/being nasty.

yoni_one

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

You air your dirty laundry on a public forum and you take your chances.

Ouch!! Permission to bully granted.

How sad.