Older children paying keep

MrsE_2

tiamaria wrote: »

I only get family allowance for the 16yr old , he actually pays me £20,maybe thats a bit harsh but I've been trying to treat them the same all along or they'd pick up on that too esp as he is earning more than the middle one who pays £25. I brought them up knowing that they had to contribute to the household when they had jobs,didn't really think about the FA. However he will get a 1.5k cheque on his 18th like the rest did so most he will get back really.

Thanks for all the opinions, i don't feel quite as guilty about the eldest one, now I feel guilty about charging the young one instead! sigh:o

I didn't charge my DD at all whike she was in education, even when she was working P/T (& earning quite a lot), in fact I gave her pocket money until she was 20.

Then she started work f/t & gives me £200 (per calender month) so its £46 per week. She does have her own sky box in her room & thats £10 pm extra (I mean £10 extra on our sky bill, I don't charge her extra) & I got the AOL package with the wireless router so she can have the internet in her room & she has a phone in her room.

She spends half the time at her boyfriends, but he spends half his time here with her.

If shes on holiday or staying at her boyfriends (if his parents are on holiday) she doesn't pay me anything:rolleyes:

leeanda

my sons 19 and an only child,hes doing an apprentiship working 4days and college 1day,he earns £600month and i dont have any board off him,he pays for his own car and insurance and own toiletries etc. do you think this is right not to charge him board?? I guess i wouldnt know how much to have off him if i did.

PolishBigSpender

Good on you not charging him.

No wonder British society is breaking down when parents are charging their children rent. Whatever happened to family values in the UK?

leeanda

I think i agree with you a little bit,he is my child and it doesnt cost me anymore to run the house than it did when he was younger and wasnt earning a wage,so why take money off him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

moggylover

pops68 wrote: »

Our son who is nearly 19 is working full time, getting approx £900 - £1000 pcm after tax and has refused to pay us anything for the last 8 months. (He is constantly moaning that he has no money!) The agreed amount of rent was £50 p.w. all inclusive (which we thought was reasonable). He sleeps til 2pm on his day off, does absolutely nothing at all in the house, his behaviour is awful, he is rude, vindictive and selfish. He often comes in at 2 or 3am waking us all and thinks that we and the rest of the world owe him a living. Oh, and he refuses to leave (I think he quite literally wants to be 'thrown out' as he thinks it will make us look bad!!)

Charging teenagers rent is definitely the right way to go. (Depending on their income). They have to learn to grow up and stand on their own two feet.

Any ideas on how to encourage him to leave before things get any worse?

Pack his things and leave them outside the house, and then change the locks:D .

Ungrateful little sod needs a massive wake up call - and you will not be helping him by allowing him to blackmail you in this way. Pity the wife he gets himself later on otherwise:eek:

moggylover

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

Good on you not charging him.

No wonder British society is breaking down when parents are charging their children rent. Whatever happened to family values in the UK?

What a totally ridiculous comment! You do your offspring NO favours at all it you allow them to continue to live like children once they are out of full-time education and earning: you just make it harder for them when they have to leave home and pay their own way.

The difference is that 30 odd years ago when I left school this was the norm (and even more so prior to that) and nowadays people are foolish enough to spoil the little darlings well into their 20's, and then wonder why they get into debt for half of their lives, or have their marriages break up because they have no idea about what money REALLY goes into keeping up a home and don't like it when they find out.:rolleyes:

moggylover

leeanda wrote: »

I think i agree with you a little bit,he is my child and it doesnt cost me anymore to run the house than it did when he was younger and wasnt earning a wage,so why take money off him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Because, he is now an adult and out of full time education - he needs to learn the cost of living and budgeting and all the other essential life skills so that when he does go out and get his own home it does not all come as too large a culture shock;)

nadnad

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

Good on you not charging him.

No wonder British society is breaking down when parents are charging their children rent. Whatever happened to family values in the UK?

errr i think you'll find in years gone by when children stayed at home and were earning they ALWAYS paid towards houeskeeping. My mum started work when she was 15 (in 1968) and the rule in her house was a third to her mum, a third to save, and a third for herself. Its certainly not a new thing and in fact probably happens less today than it did then. :rolleyes:

Margaret54

Yes they all need to pay housekeeping when they live at home I fully agree. They will know all about it whe they leave home one day and will have a great shock when they see the cost of everything....... Our youngest son is still at home and currently living on job seekers and actively looking for work, but always worked before this. We took h/keeping money off him when he worked and the same now he is not working, but a smaller amount. It teaches him that nothing is free and he needs to understand the cost of everything. We did the same with the other children when they were at home. No one should be living free at home. Even if the earnings are not a lot a small amount should still be paid into the home. Lots of great advice on here. Stand firm:)

duchy

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

Good on you not charging him.

No wonder British society is breaking down when parents are charging their children rent. Whatever happened to family values in the UK?

Could you either knock it off or change your user-name please-you're an embarassment to my Polish heritage. Embarass yourself by all means but don't drag others down with you with your crassness !