Older children paying keep

Norma_Sinclair

Remember you are the parents and you have allowed this situation to develop. You are helping mould this young man into a very irresponsible, self centred, selfish person - just the type women/girls will we running from at great speed when looking for their husband/partner.

hotchips

he cant have it both ways!!!

gemz20

I paid £100 a month to live at home when i got my first full time job 10 years ago so your son has it good if he pays that now and my dad always said if you dont like it you can always move out and rent your own place and see if a landlord will let you have weeks off paying rent because your skint or not stopping at the flat etc

hotchips

i would just tell him to leave as he is causing to much hassle!
i have 3 teenagers, age 20, 18 and 16 , i has a job, the other doesnt
and the last has just left school, i was down£200 a month when the 17yr old left and will be down another £175 when this one leaves school, they always
complain about how much they have to pay to live in your house, but all i say
is go and do it on your own and find out what it really costs!!!
currently our 20yr old gives us £230 month, that is his share of the cost of
running our house(between 5), including gas, electric, phone, rent, council tax, and broadband. YOUNG ONES DONT KNOW THEY ARE EVEN LIVING!!!
when i first worked i got £25 week and £13 of that went to my keep!!!
plus i had to pay my bus fares and lunch money, anything left was for a night out. HA! young ones make me sick!

mezelks

I have three older brothers, and from the very first day we had jobs, my mum charged us 20% of what we had earnt, after tax.
So...If you earned £100, you paid £20 'rent'
If you erned nothing, we paid nothing.
Pretty fair, and as soon as I have kids, that will be my policy too!

hotchips

pops68 wrote: »

Our son who is nearly 19 is working full time, getting approx £900 - £1000 pcm after tax and has refused to pay us anything for the last 8 months. (He is constantly moaning that he has no money!) The agreed amount of rent was £50 p.w. all inclusive (which we thought was reasonable). He sleeps til 2pm on his day off, does absolutely nothing at all in the house, his behaviour is awful, he is rude, vindictive and selfish. He often comes in at 2 or 3am waking us all and thinks that we and the rest of the world owe him a living. Oh, and he refuses to leave (I think he quite literally wants to be 'thrown out' as he thinks it will make us look bad!!)

Charging teenagers rent is definitely the right way to go. (Depending on their income). They have to learn to grow up and stand on their own two feet.

Any ideas on how to encourage him to leave before things get any worse?

just tell him its not working out and that he is making life very difficult for
everyone else, thats what we are about to do with our son!!:j

Little_Otter

I'm 21 and still live at home - sort of... I stay at b/f mums with him 3-4 nights pw and mine the rest (with him too) I used to pay £240 a week for all bills board and food half to step dad half to mum (bills/food) but i was always out and never ate at home, having tea at his mums or meals out, so mum said I didnt need to pay her food rent anymore, I pay £120 for the month now which is great imo, but if I want to eat anything at home I have to go and shop/buy it all myself, Mum can be VERY petty when it comes to usung HER food!!!! I'm not petty and dont mind if ppl eat my food/use my stuff, but if i use hers I get screamed at!!!!!
And if i hear the words 'its not a hotel you know' one more time I'll scream!!!!
I'm the oldest and my mum cant wait for me to move out, and openly tells me all the time, which is awful to hear, as I am not a bad girl. never been in trouble. I dont do loads round the house, but i'm not there a lot.......

poppyolivia

I only had to pay for 2 bags of coal a wk!!! Sweet lord I sound like I'm 90!lol This was about 11 years ago....was about £11!!lol

nadnad

i saved myself all this bother and looked after myself by working part time from i was 14, then moved out when i was 18 to go to university and havent been back to live since. Arent i the type of daughter everyone wants!

princess_siobhan

my mum always said that either we worked or were in full time education, if not in education had to pay keep at a similar amount of keep you claimed. i think it is best to ask him to continue paying, it is a lot less than he would ever had to pay in rent, and he will still be utilising the space and preventing you making use of it.

Even though it is hard a parent to go against your kids wishes, especially regarding money, keeping him paying will help him in the long term as he has to learn to save money for rent, in the future landlords wont have to be any where near as lenient and caring as you. i know it will be tough, but stay strong on the 'keep' issue, he will thank you in the end!

xxx