Leaving my Boyfriend

racer256

Hi all

I have been with my OH for 4 years and have lived together for two and a half years. I am thinking of leaving him as he is lazy and expects me to do everything in the house and despite several attempts to rekindle the romance it has gove stale and I feel the need to move on. Also we both want different things.

I am not sure of where I stand financially we have a joint account and thats all we have jointly. He has a 0% credit card which we brought a computer and will be cleared by March 2009.

I know with married couples everything is split in half but is this the same as those who are living together. I have savings and do not want to share these with him. The thought of him blowing my money on drink and clothes etc makes me shudder! He can have everything in the flat but not my savings!

I am hoping someone with experience will help me out? If I am late in replying its because he is normally around the flat and I can't get peace to myself (I am writing this at work!)

ajaney

Hi,

A few questions:

1) Do you rent or are you buying on Mortgage?

2) If rent, who name(s) on tenancy?

3) If Mortgage, is it joint?

If your OH wanted to get his hands on your savings, he would need to pursue you in the courts & prove he had contributed to those savings or was entitled to received some of the money - that is my understanding.

racer256

ajaney wrote: »

Hi,

A few questions:

1) Do you rent or are you buying on Mortgage?

2) If rent, who name(s) on tenancy?

3) If Mortgage, is it joint?

If your OH wanted to get his hands on your savings, he would need to pursue you in the courts & prove he had contributed to those savings or was entitled to received some of the money - that is my understanding.

Hi thanks, no we rent & the lease is in my name. He has defo not contributed to my savings lol!

tuggy

No dont worry he is enttitled to NOTHING you're fine!

check this out

http://www.lawontheweb.co.uk/basics/cohabit.htm

it says its every man and women for themselves!

racer256

Thanks does this cover Scotland?

ajaney

It should be much easier as there is no joint property to dispose of.

The joint account - is this overdrawn at all.

Are you planning to stay on in the current home?

If yes, then you will have to ask him to leave within a set time period.

If no, then you will need to consider if there is any 'tied-in' period, i.e if you have signed a lease for a fixed amount of time - as it is in your name, if you want to leave early then you would be responsible for the costs.

Do you think the OH has any idea that you are thinking of splitting?

I think your savings would be safe unless OH wanted to take you to court & try to prove a case (like he contributed over & above reasonable funds to living costs which enabled you to build up your savings)

racer256

Hi ajaney, the joint account is not overdrawn at the moment. I am worried the minute I tell him I am leaving him that he will take his debit card and withdraw all of the cash as he spends money like it is water! I will also leave the flat we have to give a months notice of leaving the flat and I'll get some cleaners in as we have a good landlord and just out of good will.

I don't think he has a clue but he has been a bit clingy recently. I have acted as normal as I can also I am still not sure whether this is totally what I want, that is why I am just asking rather than doing anything so I know I am covered.

There is no way he has contributed to anything I have saved if anything I have over contributed for the bills & rent because at the moment he is earning less than me. But will earn more than me when he is fully trained!

zzzLazyDaisy

If you are in Scotland, you need to seek advice as there is such a thing as a 'common law' husband/wife in Scotland which confers legal rights.

So please make sure that you get advice specifically directed at your situation as there is no legal equivalent of the common law spouse in England, so English sites may mislead you (although people do use the term in England it does not exist in law).

racer256

Thanks just googling it now!

ajaney

The law in Scotland is different so please do take some proper advice - my earlier posts presumed you were in England.

For some information:
http://www.opsi.gov.uk/legislation/scotland/acts2006/asp_20060002_en_1

Scroll down the table of contents to Cohabiting (starts at number 25). There is some mention of equal sharing of monies so please do take some advice - perhaps a chat with a solicitor in Family Law.

racer256

Thanks for that Ajaney, as far as I understand it the law recognises what his is his and what is mine is mine?