council house overcrowding/medical, HelpPlease, im in a mess and need good advice!!!

vivatifosi

I used to live next door to a one bedroom house with five people living in it. Two adults and two kids slept in the bedroom. At 8pm each night you'd hear the shower going as everyone got ready for bed, then bang bang bang as they put a platform over the bath to put a bed on for the (quite short) grandmother to sleep on. The tiny living room functioned for every other purpose - dining area, TV watching area, playroom for the kids, etc.

There are also at least two houses within a five minute walk from here where children (more than one in both cases) sleep in the conservatories.

While I sympathise with your case, there really are many, many worse cases of overcrowding, so please think laterally and consider some of the inventive solutions that people have come up with. I do hope that the council comes up trumps for you, but there's a strong likelihood that they won't/can't if they don't have five bedroom houses.

wisbech_lad

Yep, move the 4yo in with the 19yo and give the 16 yo the quietest room.

I shared with sister until puberty, and then got own room (sisters shared) For one year we were in 2 bed flat, so I slept on enclosed balcony. Left home at 17, it isn't the end of the family by any means.

Ironically, once we all left home, my parents moved to five bedroom place in the cotswolds!!! Still, gets a bit crowded at Xmas with the grandchildren!

I think you are fixating on the idea of a 5 bed house as being a panacea. This is helping you avoid making difficult decisions now.

Good luck with it all

catkins

silvercar wrote: »

Not at all. The government may like to class 19 year olds as independent adults but they are not. With the government wanting everyone to stay on at school and if possible to go on to higher education, its a bit rich to say once they are 19 they should leave the family home. A 19 year old will do far better in life with the support of their family, than being throwm out and told to fend for themselves.

A 19 year old is quite capable of living on their own and fending for themselves. My parents started work at 14. Youngsters today are just mollycoddled

Running_Horse

Indeed. I couldn't wait to leave home, and would have loved to be offered a flat.

poppysarah

Moving is very stressful as is dealing with builders - with such a stressed family there's got to be some short term jigging about of rooms until the family can feel comfortable.

margaretclare

catkins wrote: »

A 19 year old is quite capable of living on their own and fending for themselves. My parents started work at 14. Youngsters today are just mollycoddled

I agree with this. There may be shouts of 'things were different then', but it used to be commonplace in times past. Boys we would consider children now aged 10, 12 or even younger, were midshipmen in Nelson's navy. Working-class families with many children, 8 or 10 to a family in a tiny cottage, the eldest moved out into live-in jobs at 12.

I myself was away from home living in lodgings at age 17 because of jobs far from home. My late husband was in the Merchant Navy at age 15.

Oldernotwiser

Nearly 50% of 19 year olds are living away from home at university. I'm also surprised that this young man doesn't seem to accept any responsibility in helping his family solve their problems!

lil_me

Just another thing I forgot, the family of 9 I just love visiting, their family are so close, they all help each other and it makes you realise what real families were like but have now forgot. The stories of my parents sharing beds with siblings and wearing clothes in bed to keep warm, nothing rude/perverted, it's just cozy!

I remember school friends of mine (I'm only 30 so not that long ago, well sort of) shared rooms with brothers and sisters, my best friend in school shared a room with her brother (bunks) until she was 21 and he was 22 when she moved out. There was nothing ever said to them, as her parents owned their house it wasn't a case of apply to move somewhere bigger.

SingleSue

Too true

I left home at 16, went back at 17 and left for the last time at 18....I couldn't wait to get my independence as I had to share a room with my much younger sister!

Mind you, my brother was still living at home into his 30's, mum used to moan about it but when he finally left, she missed him like crazy as all her kids had finally flown the nest (my brother is the eldest!)

My mum was one of 10 children living in a 3 bedroom house, all the girls slept in the big bedroom in one big bed (they laid sideways on the bed - if one wanted to turn over a command had to be given and they all turned at the same time), the boys in another room and in similar arrangements and their parents in a box room.

tinkerbell84

My cousin has medical and special educational needs.

He was housed in a flat on his own at 18 and is coping brilliantly. He's gone from a child to a man in about 18 months. He still loves his family, and visits regularly, but is building his own life and loving every minute of it.