Enquiry about benefits and housing?

Boppy_2

One word TROLL, i can't even be bothered to read this thread now, you original poster are pathetic and if you are real then god help your child!

Bogof_Babe

So if you have it all sorted out, and are fully prepared both mentally and financially to give this child a good life, what are you doing on the benefits board?

Most parents can manage to have a baby and find out about maternity pay, child benefit etc., without having to reveal their life stories on a public internet forum.

That alone makes me doubt your readiness for the course you plan to take.

tom9980

Shadow919 wrote: »

One more thing i know who my girlfriend is as we've spent whole weeks at mine or hers every now and then when our parents go away, we know each other better than you could know or begin to understand so do not say that... I mean so far everyone's just trying to come up with reasons to stop us and even resorting to tactics like do you even know your partner... If i didn't would i even consider it?

To be honest this guy has to be a troll but if not i will answer.

Benefits you will get some but not nearly enough child benefit maybe some council tax and housing benefit if your very lucky since student loans etc count as income and im guessing that with your work will mean you get nothing. Council housing sorry not a chance.

Before i moved in with my partner we spent weeks together at a time it was great afterall alone and doing what we wanted how could it not be great? BUT even despite living that close it was different when we moved in together, im sure most couples would say the same thing. You are going to do just that having got her pregnant, what if you change your minds? by not waiting just a few short years you are locking yourself into a lifetime of that child. You will have no options and no choices.

Frankly to me it seems like your rushing into this far too quickly i mean how long have you even been together? shes 16 so couldnt have been that long. It seems to me she may be rushing to maybe fix mistakes her parents may have made in the past due to divorce etc, she most likely feels a bit unloved hasnt really resolved that fact and now wants a child she believes will make everything OK again because she wont make those mistakes. Little does she realise that she is making possibly one of the worst decisions of her life. I know of a girl who said all the right things when she got pregnant accidentely at 16yrs 3 years on that girl really shouldnt be allowed to have care of that child she resents it and the life she could of had without it. She drinks, goes out too much etc despite not being that girl before and at times her care of that child is unacceptable.

Shadow all people here are saying is both of you go to Uni and college then get a job then have kids its a wait of what 3-4 years if your relationship is still strong through all of that important growing up stress then go for it. But now is just totally irresponsible and nobody is going to tell you otherwise because they know what its really like in the real world.

By the way what makes you think you can get private rented accomadation easily? Letting agents will see young couple 16yr old girl pregnant only one of you working and they wont like it one bit and frankly see you as irresponsible chav kids. At a minimum they will want a few months rent in advance and maybe someone to be your garantors incase you default on payment. Do you have £3k to buy all that furniture, clothes, pay rent that this will take to do now? this is what it cost me 2 years ago.

Do what you like but i mean 3-4 years? its no time at all. Really think about this a lot before you do it.

elektra-2007

I'd be very carefull if I was you. As your partner is only 16 and you dont live together the Goverment might make her parents claim for the child. As for social housing it takes years unless you want undesirable areas or you look at private renting. But you have my sympathy for the child in all this uncertanty for the future.

alison999

i dont get what the rush is, if youre gonna be together forever than just wait 5 years at least. forevers a long time to live with 'bad' decision. i totally agree that the girl probably just wants the baby for someone to love/be loved by. but trust me it takes a long time to feel like your baby loves you, you ont get hugs/kisses/smiles for months.

parisjordana

Shadow919 wrote: »

Also with this we take care of her little sister most of the time in the week, carrying round nappies, wipes and the like 24/7 along with looking after it, keeping it entertained, ensuring that she eats properly etc etc.
.

Did you just say "IT" you quoted wipes and the like 24/7 along with looking after "IT",keeping "IT" entertained.....
you were talking about a child not a dog ,O dear......

briona

This is the perfect example of what's wrong with the benefit system! You've barely contributed to the benefits system and yet are planning to extract as much from it as possible from the earliest date you can?! :mad: Let's have a baby "because we're engaged and it seems to be the next step" (!!!!!!!) and get ourselves a nice council house and all the benefits in the world, and somehow we'll both continue with our education while bringing "it" up only "it" won't be sat in front of the TV like everyone else's kids, "it" will be loved and looked after because "it's" ours. Jesus. Christ. Almighty!

You haven't thought ANY of this through. Why are you so set on having a baby now? Don’t you want an education? Or to travel? Or just to grow up a bit?! Whilst it is true that some 'young relationships' go the distance, very many more do not, but as others have said, if having a baby is really what you want, then go for it but don't expect the state to cough up at every turn.

Perhaps you should read some other threads on these boards? Like the ones from posters who have been waiting for a council house for 20 years. Not to mention the ones in skanky temporary accommodation because they have to live somewhere and the council has nothing available. Or perhaps the ones from young couples struggling to get by on benefits. Especially when they try to better themselves by getting an education. After all if you're in full time education, you no longer qualify for JSA…

I would strongly recommend you give this hare-brained plan a bit more thought, but being 18 I suspect you think you know it all already! :rolleyes:

Shadow919

Fran wrote: »

What time exactly do you think you will be spending with a baby? You intend to work full time at Wetherspoons which obviously includes weekends, you intend to do a demanding college course - Architecture is not going to be an easy option, and then you will get home and.... look after the baby? I don't think so! So your girlfriend finds herself at home all the time with the baby while you are at work or college .... then what? She might get just a little p1ssed off with life.

i will be working part time alongside going to university or working full time... ok people slate me when others cant read and take in information correctly. Secondly i cook not wait on people....

Next people are simply stereotyping am i right? Because i'm young i have no patience....

I called the baby it as we don't know whether it will be boy or girl, correct?

Along with this i KNOW i dont know everything else why would i be on here asking for advice, i mean !!!!!!???

Tom9980 thank you for your reply as you seem to be the only person to offer the advice i've been searching for. People, particularly those in there 30's/40's accuse children of categorising themselves but they do it just as much, i came here for advice and have been slated correct?

See what people are saying i have taken into account, yeah university is all well and good but to me having a family is by far more important. Thats how i see it, and if need be i would forget uni etc. Along with child abuse, if that was so then why is it legal to have sex at the age of 16 with the risk of getting pregnant, why not make it so you can't have a baby until you are what, say 24 when your past uni etc?

I do not expect the state to cough up as and when i demand, i simply asked are we entitled to anything? How long would it take?

I know that if i must i will go into full time employment for this, i have a few jobs lined up that are willing to take me on come next september. I know it takes hard work and determination, i know it goes a long way, her grandfather was like it and now lives in Hawaii, my grandparents met at 14 and are still together at the age of 70.

I don't deny its going to be a battle and will test everything we have learnt, everything we are but the first place to start is by planning and that's why i am on here, to find out any little bit of information i can.

alison999

ok, you want a baby but when youre gonna be together forever why not just wait til you've done uni? whats the rush?

briona

Shadow919 wrote: »

I called the baby it as we don't know whether it will be boy or girl, correct? .

You didn’t just refer to the baby as "it" – in an earlier post you referred to your girlfriend’s little sister as "it", and I take it you do know what sex she is?!

Shadow919 wrote: »

Next we have had experience of child handling, firstly i have a teaching assistant qualification and have worked with children right through the key stages, including those with disability. Also with this we take care of her little sister most of the time in the week, carrying round nappies, wipes and the like 24/7 along with looking after it, keeping it entertained, ensuring that she eats properly etc etc.

And child "handling"? Jesus! Once again, you sound as though you are referring to an animal! Trust me, there is a big difference between looking after someone else’s child and having one of your own. I had my first babysitting job at 14, and whilst undoubtedly you could derive a certain degree of pleasure from walking down the street pushing a child in a pram leading you to think "how nice it would be to have one of my own", being able to hand back a screaming, tired, cranky or ill child to his/her parents is an unbelievable relief. BTW there's far more to bringing up a child than "carrying nappies and wipes around 24/7". :rolleyes:

Perhaps you and your girlfriend should get one of those programmable dolls that cries every 4 hours, the kind they give to wannabe teenage mums on TV! – it would be interesting to see how you’d cope. In almost all cases, having had the "baby" for all of two weeks, the wannabe mums were far less keen to have children! Personally I don’t see what the rush is! You can’t just hand a child back once you get bored of him/her. Or when you start longing to go to pubs and clubs with your friends. Or when you fancy two weeks in Ibiza…

Isn’t it amazing that young people today have far more choices in life than their grandparents or great-grandparents did and yet all they want to do is have children?!