HSBC - Serious complaint about Senior Advisor - ADVICE NEEDED

lightisfading

Sometimes fatties need to be humiliated to get them to help themselves...

Nobody EVER needs to be 'humiliated'. A frank discussion may be needed sometimes but humiliation is just rude, selfish, arrogant, bullying behaviour.

uktim29

lightisfading wrote: »

Nobody EVER needs to be 'humiliated'.

Funnily enough, I don't think the op needs any help to do that, she seems to have done a very good job of it herself.

muddypaws2807

Contraryclaire, there are worse things that happen in the world, and think you are being over sensitive or after a quick buck here.

Forget it and get on with your life, it was a throw away comments and taken all out of context

DrFluffy

My gosh - I thought you said SERIOUS complaint... It might not be professional, but I don't think it amounts to serious, especially if your irked because he might have had a point...

pinkshoes

contraryclairie wrote: »

I hand over my driver's licence (the photo was taken when I was 16, I'm 24 now) and I joking say something along the lines of "I look like a young offender in that picture, but it is me really."

I was sitting down opposite and he then looked me up and down LAUGHED and said to me "well...you've gained a little weight since then haven't you?"

Firstly, if he'd just picked up your driving license and commented that you'd put on weight, then THAT would be inappropriate, but by telling him that you look like a young offender first, he probably thought you had a sense of humour, and hence the joke about putting on a bit of weight!

Secondly, I find it odd that you have no problem telling someone you look like a criminal, but you take utmost offence that someone then says you've put on a little weight since you were 16.

Thirdly, if you have gone from a size 8 to a size 14 in the last 8 years, then his comment is a truthful observation. He's male. Men are blunt and don't get the whole sensitive thing.

I really hope this guy doesn't lose his job over this, as although it was slightly insensitive, he no doubt only said it as a joke after your (also inappropriate?? - in a bank!!!) comment about looking like a criminal!!

CHR15

The OP isn't coming back......... It's dinner time!

THE_LONE_RANGER_4

this is silly he could have said god you suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure is ugly.

vixarooni

maybe im the only one who sympathises with the OP? But then im thinking back to when i was a teenager and i was a size 16. Nothing i could do about it then, it fell off naturally but jeez, if anyone said anything about my weight i would go home in tears and feel the pooiestperson on the planet.

However, ive grown a good mouth since then, and if someone had said that to me i would have given as good back!

Although there was this woman who made a comment about my breasts once, not a nice one either. I was so shocked i just smiled! Now i dont even serve her, but (this probably sounds bad) when she said it to me she had a walking stick, now she comes in in a wheelchair, i take a glimmer of pleasure that what comes around goes around!

its all about sticks and stones isnt it

dangeroussports

lightisfading wrote: »

Sometimes fatties need to be humiliated to get them to help themselves...

Nobody EVER needs to be 'humiliated'. A frank discussion may be needed sometimes but humiliation is just rude, selfish, arrogant, bullying behaviour.

I know what you mean but sometimes you HAVE to be cruel to be kind. Ever heard of the term 'cruel to be kind', its an old English saying. But the fluffy approach is sometimes met with apathy, excuses etc....."Cruel to be kind" is the way forward, a shocking tactic but it'll work....if however they are a shrinking violet then so be it...but humilating them usually does the trick BUT they end up getting all paranoid and have a grudge against the world if humiliated too much.

Im sorry if you are a fat and have taken this post as offensive its not meant to be but rather a way of getting fat people to stop eating too much.

nuttytart26

I was fat because I over ate and didnt exercise. Realised I was fat when someone asked me when the baby was due... not nice but it made me look at myself and how I was treating my body. Just lost 3 stone at WW, not been easy but so worthwhile. By nature I am a confident person but I had such low self esteem about my body/shape when I was over weight that I would get upset about really silly and pathetic things. Didnt realise it at the time but I do now (Hope that makes sense!)
J x