Getting Even More Desperate

blind-as-a-bat_2

Rylynn wrote: »

Can I ask how old your children are? You are paying for your sons contract? is he not old enough to get a paper round? I also understand from reading here the OR can cancel contracts you then do not have to pay them off they go into your BR is that right blind as a bat? Yes if they decide to dissalow them they can be icluded, but this seldom seems to happen. Yet another grey area. If you want rid of mobile contracts its best they are in arears befor BR then there is no question of them going ito it

I agree with BAAB, you need to decide what you are going to do, and is the house in joint names?

If your partner takes home £300 more than you do why is he only contributing the amount he is, and yes they will want his whole income taken into consideration but I assume they also have to take into consideration his expenses ie a car? again is that right BAAB? In a DMP a partners income shouldnt come into it if the debts are not his, this is a way the creditors get a higher payment on a DMP by insiting it is, but when it comes to the costs of running the home, then just as it is in an IPA calculation it should be shown he is contributing his share, so its not so much his income your declaring its proving your not reduceing your surplus by them contributing less

If that made sense

Are the debts and mortgage all in your name only?Good point forgot to ask that one:o

If that made sense...........

Rylynn

It made sense to me BAAB, as it was my first thought that the OR would see his low input as a way to not pay an IPA or pay less to one. Also if the debts are joint this is going to make a difference as well, and the mortgage, not sure how they work that out, is it not feasible for your to both go bankrupt?

Rubie-blu

I have a £900 od with bank plus one credit card, £1509. I know this sounds daft, but I'm worried about opening a bank a/c with different bank - do they ask questions? I've banked with my current one since i was a kid (mum opened savings account).

Yes he should get paper round - maybe i am not tough enough with him i know, i keep nagging him to get a little part time job and I need to reinforce somehow.

CAB said that OH expenses would be taken into account if his whole income was used - but even then the disposable left over is £492, and DMP offer is £505 so there's still a shortfall. If I try and push him to give me more, he might just clear out altogether and that leaves me in even worse situ.... Do you really think he's not giving enough - bearing in mind he hasn't contributed to the debt? Everything's in my name - we've only been together about 3 years. We were only having a bit of fun - no intention of getting married or anything.

blind-as-a-bat_2

In that situation then no it is not fair, unless he helped build some of this debt up, which im reading he hasnt.

If you GO BR he will only need to show he is contrubuting his share, as long as its 50/50 he should be kept out of it


But if you have "lent " him anything money wise say so now, small amounts dont matter but say over a !k may cause problems

Rylynn

Oh dear another person like me, all the debts bar one in my name, but then he cleared off! Is the house solely then in your name? When you say he has not contributed to the debt, does that mean you had the debt when you met him, or has it been taken out since you met him? If they are your debts I can see that he would not want to repay them, however if he has had things or holidays from them then surely he should be prepared to help with the cost.

On the bank issue if you go BR your bank may not allow you to bank with them, I understand very few keep BRs as customers, and if your overdraft is with that bank and goes into the BR there is very little to no chance of keeping an account with them. There is a topic at the top of this board I think regarding bank accounts.

When you say if he leaves you would be in an even worse situation, would you? if you go BR and all your debts are gone, and you have not got any of his income I cannot see you would pay an IPA, you would not have enough left, mind you someone here may be able to tell you that you could be refused BR if you are heavily left with a minus figure.

Rubie-blu

No he hasn't contributed to the debt - it's all mine. Although I have used credit for living expenses and even to meet mortgage payments recently. But i have been in debt for many years - this has now made me realise that debt never goes away - i've consolidated many times in remortgaging, but can't afford to up the mortgage anymore. I know i've been stupid but hindsight is a wonderful thing.

We did have a holiday on one of my cards, but he's paying back his share in the extra 200 a month. I just loaded it onto a card but it was for the 6 of us to go (that's me and my son, OH and his 3).

It would leave me in worse situ - I don't want him to go for a start, I enjoy his company.... and I'd be down £700 (or £500 from December) a month. He didn't even know I had a debt problem until beginning July 08.....

The house is in my name, my son and my mum live with me. I need to get a benefit check done on my mum, but I doubt if that will make a great deal of difference even if they say should get a bit more.

Funnily enought Rylynn, your user name is very similar to mine and my son's real names..... I don't know if I'm allowed to say (if you haven't already guessed) for giving away any identity. Talking of identify, if someone steals mine would I be better off??

blind-as-a-bat_2

I think the easiest way to look at this for now is to treat your OH, as a lodger paying rent, it helps to de-personalise it

Have you any idea what the rents for a property that is big enough for all of you would be in your area?

You cant really know how you will be financialy untill you know how much it will cost to rent

What im saying is you need to do anothe I&E for how things would be IF you decided on BR and let the house go

Rubie-blu

Around the area i'm in its roughly £750-£800. If I move further afield this could affect my travel costs. As it stands I could walk to work, although it takes about 35/40 mins. But I think I could argue that i need to keep the car for my mum, if nothing else to get her back and forth to various hospital appts. If i can't keep the one i've got, i'd have to get another one if only for that purpose. Is it ok to suggest he's a rent paying lodger?

If I do another I&E should I include the debt payments? And is it fair to assume that my utility costs will be largely the same?

blind-as-a-bat_2

Rubie-blu wrote: »

Around the area i'm in its roughly £750-£800. If I move further afield this could affect my travel costs. As it stands I could walk to work, although it takes about 35/40 mins. But I think I could argue that i need to keep the car for my mum, if nothing else to get her back and forth to various hospital appts. If i can't keep the one i've got, i'd have to get another one if only for that purpose. Is it ok to suggest he's a rent paying lodger?as its a "casual" relationship you may get away with it but three years is a bit of a stretch to claim its casual, tough call really

If I do another I&E should I include the debt payments? And is it fair to assume that my utility costs will be largely the same?

Hard to say it will depend on what the new property has regarding heating etc but for now thats all you can do


If you do decide to go BR you wont have any debts, so without

Rubie-blu

Thank you for your advice today, its been really helpful. I feel a lot better than I did 3 or 4 hours ago..... Shall I post my revised soa allowing for rent and not mortgage and debt. Bottom line is, if mobile has to go and food bills need to cut then so be it... Just one more question - should i write to creditors to explain that i can't afford the minimum payments, at least for now?