What would you do?

RoxieW

Perhaps look at how you could up your incomes cos if you cant save a deposit when paying £250 a month rent, how are you going to be able to afford rent, utilities, council etc all the bills related to having a baby? Good luck

lincsdan86

I am in the process of interviewing for a number of jobs which come with a pay rise, if i get them. Also we havnt been saving any money for a deposit becuase we are trying to clear our debts, with this new job (hopefully) and only pay the bare minimum of our debts we might be able to scrap together enough for a deposit within a month but that isnt going to help us if he throws us out before hand

Oldernotwiser

lincsdan86 wrote: »

specialK wrote: »

I think he is against it because there isnt anything really in it for him. honestly that is what i believe.

Perhaps if you paid him a decent rate then he might feel differently? £50 for a room for one person is quite cheap but for a couple with a baby it's a pittance! Do you split the bills with the 2 of you paying 2/3 and what happens with the Council Tax? Unless you're paying your way properly I can't blame your brother being shirty, particularly with the domestic habits you seem to have. (Eating in your bedroom yuk!)

lincsdan86

If there was a suitable place for us to eat else where in the house then maybe we would! The kitchen is often cluttered with stuff on the table. the Living room is constantly in darkness (he doesnt open the curtains). Normally when it comes time for us to eat he is sat in the living room with his headphones attached to the TV so if we was down there we would be able to listen to it. I'm not on here to discuss our domestic habits with anyone and to be honest I dont want comments like that, just want some help in how to sort this out! If we could afford to pay him more then we would, especially as this is the price we agreed on! and that was with my partner being there! now all our other spare cash is going to clear debts so when the baby comes we aint got as many!!!

oystercatcher

Maybe he is unwilling to throw you out just yet as he still wants the rent money after all £250 a month is still worth having... so if you stay for another three months and go at the last minute he's quids in!!

Oystercatcher

lostinrates

lincsdan86 wrote: »

If there was a suitable place for us to eat else where in the house then maybe we would! The kitchen is often cluttered with stuff on the table. the Living room is constantly in darkness (he doesnt open the curtains). Normally when it comes time for us to eat he is sat in the living room with his headphones attached to the TV so if we was down there we would be able to listen to it. I'm not on here to discuss our domestic habits with anyone and to be honest I dont want comments like that, just want some help in how to sort this out! If we could afford to pay him more then we would, especially as this is the price we agreed on! and that was with my partner being there! now all our other spare cash is going to clear debts so when the baby comes we aint got as many!!!

I'm not quite sure why the brother is not getting fairer representation from people to the OP here.

OP, I commend you for dealing with your debts and congrtulations on the impending baby.

but it seems your brother has been contributory to you being able to work on your debts by offering to have you and your partner stay with him for such a small cost. Regardless of your opinion of the way your brother lives it IS his home and his right to do so. Quite frankly for a single person even living with a couple can be a PITA let alone a couple who seem, I'm sorry, quite resentful of his better situation. rather than judging your brother so harshly for his mess, his closed curtains and his single staus maybe you could be grateful for the roof over your heads and try and find a nice person to send hm on dates with.

However, the situation seems untenable for all three of you and it would seem to me that moving in any way possible must come first. Like it or not I'd consider asking your parents for help at this stage. It might well be your brother has expressed frustration at the situation too and they might be expecting it and be illing to do something that would improve things for both their childrn.

I do try not to be too judgemental but I were your brother and read this thread moving out PDQ would rapidly become your only option

Oldernotwiser

lincsdan86 wrote: »

If there was a suitable place for us to eat else where in the house then maybe we would! The kitchen is often cluttered with stuff on the table. the Living room is constantly in darkness (he doesnt open the curtains). Normally when it comes time for us to eat he is sat in the living room with his headphones attached to the TV so if we was down there we would be able to listen to it. I'm not on here to discuss our domestic habits with anyone and to be honest I dont want comments like that, just want some help in how to sort this out! If we could afford to pay him more then we would, especially as this is the price we agreed on! and that was with my partner being there! now all our other spare cash is going to clear debts so when the baby comes we aint got as many!!!

There's no need to get tetchy, your domestic habits are going to be relevant if the person you're sharing with wants you to move.

So you're saying that you only pay £250 for the 2 of you, with nothing towards the bills or the council tax (on which he's losing his 25% discount)? I can't say I blame your brother for wanting you out as you're seriously taking the !!!!! You're not even making up for your lack of contributions by clearing the place up. The problem is of your making (as is the baby you aren't able to house) so stop blaming everybody else for your situation and get your act together!

lincsdan86

Anyway getting off the point a little bit ere, all this thread as meant to be about is asking for HELP, as to what we should do from here on in. As isnt that the whole point of this forum helping each other and not judging or having a pop. So if you havent got any helpful comments them please I'm asking politely if you would keep your opinions to yourself.

Oldernotwiser

lincsdan86 wrote: »

Anyway getting off the point a little bit ere, all this thread as meant to be about is asking for HELP, as to what we should do from here on in. As isnt that the whole point of this forum helping each other and not judging or having a pop. So if you havent got any helpful comments them please I'm asking politely if you would keep your opinions to yourself.

I'm sorry that you saw my comments as unhelpful as the opposite was intended. I'll start again.

If you would like to stay living at your brother's house then the chances of doing that will be higher if you start paying him a reasonable rent, as well as splitting the bills and the council tax 3 ways. I can't see how anything anyone can say could be more helpful than that as it will achieve your desired aim quite easily. If your brother doesn't see himself as subbing you but can see a financial benefit in it for him, he may still want you to leave before the baby arrives but he might well be happy for you to stay for a few months longer whilst you sort out your finances.

As an aside (and a constructive comment) I'm not sure that you're really aware of some of the costs involved. The loss of the 25% CT discount is probably costing him about £40 per month and most people in a shared house would budget for around £10 each for their share of the bills, excluding telephone and water. If you look at this from his point of view, he'll be clearing less than £30 a month from your rent. I think that most people would agree that this is a tiny amount of compensation for having to share your home with 2 people, with the risk of a baby to join them.

Your brother may not be a nice person but you'd have to be a saint to tolerate the situation at present without making any complaints.

lincsdan86

I'm sorry Oldernotwiser, but this subject is causing me and my partner alot of un need stress so i do tend to get a little touchy about it, but i shudnt have directed it at you,

Okay, we worked out the other day exactly the extra costs for him which are:

Council tax: approx 40 (as you say)
Gas: gone up by 10 a month
Electric: at most 25 a month
Water: 10 a month

Giving a total of: 85 which gives him a total of £165 extra cash which is about an extra pay rise of about £3000 a year for having us stay in his house where we hardly see each other - (ships in the night)

What would you suggest being a reasonable amount of money to pay?