Depression Support Thread

Tulip

Tiff wrote: »

Hi katie-tulip!:hello:

Pssst - - pressie just for you katie! Don't tell anyone!!!:shhh:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KATIE-TULIP!

I wish you every happiness and everything good for your new birthday year! Have a wonderful day sweetheart.
Much Love,

Tiff xxx

thanks Tiff,eats all the smarties *wink*

Tiff_2

Hi guys!:hello:
Only me.
I'm sending a warm to merlot and to timcrips. You're both most welcome and I hope you'll stay around and join the lovely clan that we have here. New posters are always welcome.

......

Now you know I haven't got a life so for goodness sake, somebody please post something or I'll end up posting my poetry!

As I await your sober contributions (ha-ha sazzy!...), I guess there's nothing else to say except...

I hope everyone one is feeling well and that the weekend will be a good one.
Be kind to yourself.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

shazrobo

happy birthday katie
sorry i can't do graphics, so just imagine me handing you a homemade birthday cake
have a good day hun
big hugs
shaz xxx

Tulip

shazrobo wrote: »

happy birthday katie
sorry i can't do graphics, so just imagine me handing you a homemade birthday cake
have a good day hun
big hugs
shaz xxx

thanks Shaz,its ok dont worry about not doing a graphic


Katie

Tiff_2

Hi kl!:hello:
Apologies for the late response but have been on badgie-watch. I've been trying to get some time to reply something useful to people but I've been so busy, it's unreal.
How are you hun? Let's have a look here, angel...

kl wrote:

I returned to work on Wednesday which was OK. Haven't got any systems other than my email and internet so couldnt do any "real" work even if I had wanted to. It was good to see everyone, but I am still worried about doing the actual work itself. The thought of speaking to customers fills me with dread - and this is probably the most important part of resolving a complaint. Problem is, I just don't care any more and I know this will come across in my voice.

Well done you for going back to work! It's a huge step to take and I'm glad it went ok hunnie. I'd guess that you had dreaded the anticipated return to work kl, (which is quite natural), but you did it! I think it was good that the systems were down, giving you a chance to settle in slowly. Now maybe you're dreading dealing with actual customers, would it help you to remember how you were dreading returning to work, but that it wasn't as bad as you thought it would be, iykwim? The anticipation of such things can really play havoc with us all. And don't forget sweetie - no-one expects you to be at full speed right now, so don't be too hard on yourself.

kl wrote:

DH was discharged without a care plan in place:eek: . We do however have the Home treatment team visiting every day. Trouble is he doesn't admit to all the things going on in his head so how they are supposed to help him is beyond me - they take everything he says at absolute face value and don't ask him any probing questions. He just tries to make out everything is fine and he is normal (when really he thinks there are bugs in his head/teeth spying on him and he has a "radio" constantly playing in his head).

Firstly hun, there is a responsibility of care to provide a care plan ready for a client's discharge. I don't know about DH's diagnosis, so it's hard to point you in the right direction right now. Are you around when the home team visit? If so, I'd encourage you to tell them exactly what DH's situation really is. They need to be giving DH the right kind of care and that's not going to happen if they don't know all that's going on. I think you've got a lot on your plate hunnie and I know it's not easy for you.
Be aware that DH might refuse to let you have a say in his care and the team do have to watch the question of confidentiality, but that doesn't stop you making a statement to them, preferably in writing to them and his gp listing your concerns, so that it becomes part of his records. If you are seriously worried about DH's mental health angel, as his nearest relative (next of kin), you can approach the medical team yourself.
Here are a couple of general links. I'm not a professional hun and I can't vouch for their content - so use your own common sense as usual. Hope they help in some way.

http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Factsheets/Carers/

http://www.rethink.org/

http://www.hearing-voices.org/

kl wrote:

He hates admitting that anything is wrong and that he needs help. He has always been this way even with the physical disabilities. He'd rather struggle or not do things at all than ask for help. He is getting very frustrated and angry and I don't know what the best method is for dealing with it. When he has calmed down and apologised to me I asked him how he wanted me to deal with it and he said I should just tell him he is being unreasonable and tell him to stop it. But I worry that confronting him will just escalate his temper. So at the moment I am just calmly telling him that I am not going to listen when he is cross and I am leaving the room until he calms down. the other night this resulted in me going to bed at 8:45 lol.

I think you have handled this situation with compassion and empathy kl - I think you've done everything right. Being disabled and having mental health issues is a cruel situation and it's very easy for people to start talking about you, instead of to you. You have shown DH love and respect by asking him how he wants you to handle the difficult times. Do you feel happy with the way you've decided to handle his temper? If so, well done hunnie - the survivor inside you is still looking after you and you're able to maintain the status quo. If not, then you need to recognize how this is affecting your quality of life and seek advice from the professionals. The sentence about you worrying about confronting him and escalating his temper as he suggested, rang a little alarm bell with me tbh, hunnie. I don't know your situation angel but fear and anxiety will harm your health and your relationship. Only you know what the possible scenarios could be.

The methods for dealing with such situations are varied but, in my humble opinion kl, if you're worried that DH could become aggressive or abusive, you really do need to let the care team know before any serious situation arises, and ask their advice. Don't !!!!!foot around the situation too much hun - you need to ensure that they understand just what the situation is like or they may misunderstand and not make any changes to his care plan. You need to be honest with yourself first and then with them about just what the possible risks are - it's just as important to look after your own health sweetheart and it's not betraying him in any way. I'm sure you love DH and obviously have his best interests at heart.

kl wrote:

In myself I am feeling OK. Still having the odd down day when all I want to do is go to bed and snuggle with my cat - unfortunately the two remaining cats aren't that snuggly so it makes me miss my Big Cat. Which just makes me feel even worse.

kl wrote:

Anyhow, everyone at work said I look well (as if having a tan and losing weight solves all my problems).

KL.

I'm sorry about your cuddly cat hunnie - they can be great therapy.

Do you get any free time for yourself sweetheart? I know you're probably the main carer so that makes it even more important not to neglect yourself! Some agencies will allow you to carry the whole load unless you ask them directly and insistently for help, so don't give up talking to them angel.
I'm full of admiration kl, for the way you're coping with such a hard situation. Please make sure you continue to look after yourself.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Amber_Sunshine

I don't think Mr S will want to see me again. Either way I get hurt, just being 'friends' or not seeing him.

Sorry, Happy Birthday Katie ... however many it is, you're probably way younger than me ...

Amber_Sunshine

Funny, he hates admitting that anything's wrong with him, although I don't mean to imply that he's anywhere near as ill as KL's hub. Mind you, that's kind of a man thing, not wanting to ask for help.

LadyMorticia

((((hugs)))) Cybermummy.

I got a nice surprise through the post today - my 21st birthday present.Haha. Even though I'm almost 22.lol. My best friend had forgot to send it to me.lol. But she said it acts as a 21st birthday present and a "thanks for being a great" friend present.Hehe. I got the cutest little purse ever and a necklace. *feels special*

Happy birthday Katie. I hope you have a great day.

xx

Amber_Sunshine

When's your birthday, Cyberkid?

shazrobo

my son daniel, asked for some money to go to the shops, and as he rarely asks for money, and as he has been good all week, i gave him some, and off he went to the shop.
when he came home he presented me with a box of maltesers, telling me how much he loves me, and thanking me for looking after him in the school hols.
made my day, and made me feel special