ex and would be ex-gamblers support thread

cantcope

welcome to the thread. You've taken the first step by acknowledging you have a problem. You can have a great life without gambling. It's not easy and by no means does everything turn out great overnight. But with determination, support and the right barriers in place you can stop.
COme back again when you are tempted and read the whole thread through. That should be enough time to put you off if there is nobody about to post on here for you x

Oh_Dear

I dont know if it is forum etiquette qwqw to recomend other websites on here, I'll take a chance and suggest you take a look at www.gamblingtherapy.org.uk I really have found it instrumental in my recovery from gambling, they have real time chat rooms with other compulsive gamblers and it really can help.

I also find that reading about other peoples battles with gambling to be both inspiring and very motivational. Much like these forums can be with money issues.

You say you cant stop, believe me you can.

Riq there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, maybe its just a bit too far away to see at the minute. You are in a hell of a situation and the fact you havn't ran away and gambled is a great testament to you. It is often said that there are positives in every situation, and although I reckon you wouldnt agree at the mo. I'm sure there is.

Well done for not gambling, though.

cantcope

Thanks for the site link OhDear i'll have a look at that over the weekend. I use the live chat on the gamblers anonymous site if i need to but an alternative might be nice x

gambledandlost

cantcope wrote: »

Hi George. Nice post Glad to hear you are doing so well (other than health) and that your debt is cleared. Well done

You are right, i never intend to offend anyone but if someone doesnt like my post they are free to say so and i will apologise. Funny how they've not come back. I guess after years of not gambling you get used to people coming and going. It's just a shame that a lot of the time people only come back once they've gambled a bit more.

You have done brilliantly George. Keep it up xx

Just because I haven't posted, doesn't mean I ain't lurkin!

cantcope

HI, I'm glad you are lurking. Hope you vare doing well x

Oh_Dear

Its good to lurk.

cantcope

Agreed it is good to lurk. But why not share how you are getting on? inspire some lurkers who may not have the courage to post yet?

I could tell them how excited about Christmas I am because my presents are bought, wrapped and under the tree. Something that NEVER happened when i was gambling.

Oh_Dear

Well I do post a lot on gambling therapy (Geordie 18). But I gambled for nearly 30 years have had thousands of debt since I was 18, I'm now 46. I started stealing to fund my gambling when I was 17 and by the time I was 25 had been to prison 4 times. 17 years later I went to prison again..all crimes for gambling money.

I have been through gambling rehab 3 times 1985, 2005 and 2009. I have gambled since I left rehab last year, infact I had a gambling period in October. My Dad died in August, and I think that if I had of went for bereavement counselling I wouldn't have gambled, the time before that I gambled was at the beginning of March. This is one hell of an improvement for me. When I last gambled I took out several payday loans, and a twelve month loan, I had really over comitted, but in the twisted delussional mind of the compulsive gambler that I am, I would just win it back! LOL. Thankfully I came to my senses before I took out anymore loans and contacted CCCS, I am now on a DMP and have just made my first payment of £318. I am really pleased to be paying my debts back actually, it's something I'd never considered...my tax credits overpayment is over £4000 they were accepting my £3/month the last payment was to be in the year 2124! Others were accepting £3 or £4/month I was quite happy to pay those amounts indefinatley. But then because I had to go on a DMP because of the PDL I have had to include all the creditors. Tax credits are now getting £61. I owe approx £18000 havnt got exact total because PDL are still adding charges and hassling me.

Not gambling feels natural now, wheras once upon a time gambling was the norm. Its a hard slog and I'm yet to meet anyone who has stopped gambling without any sort of support.

I dont think the hard part is giving up gambling, I think the hard part is believing enough in ourselves, believing that we can change.

Bet, you wish you'd never asked now!

cantcope

Great post Oh Dear.Thankyou. Epecially good for those that don't think they'll ever get that bad. If you have a gambling problem it takes no prisoners and we can always get worse. A lot of people in my GA meetings have been in rehab, and then gambled again. Since coming to the meetings they havent. I can only believe its the support and understanding we have in our lives daily because of the meetings that keeps us off. Obviously some hard soul searching too.

I agree with your point about the stopping gambling not being the hard part. For me it was about changing myself as a person. I'm a working progress

Oh_Dear

Has anyone heard of PDL companies taking money from anyones bank, without either a direct debit/standing order or the debit cards details? People have told me it has happened but no-one can provide a link to show me. I've googled it and found nothing. Both my bank and cccs say its not possible, I dont owe my bank any money.

Still off the gambling, one day at a time!