Marriage over don't know where to start

scottishfreebiehunter

sorry meant friend:rotfl:

other one went out with week before has been sleeping with married man:rolleyes::rolleyes:

gerturdeanna

The part about him looking at the !!!!!! doesn't bother me, I quite like the 'tasteful' stuff myself and I've erotic books etc for when I can't sleep!! Its the timing. I did ask him about it. I jokingly said I didn't know you were into blacknwhite? He just laughed and said he was bored - wel sorry but you were meant to be looking after/playing with your son, who crys everytime you leave. He apologised for the timing etc. We had another little chat - we've given a timescale of until the end of the month staying as we are, he's going to start looking for new places to rent cos he doesn't want to move back in here. I think it holds too many bad memories for both of us, arguing or where I was when I found out etc etc. At the end of the month, we will re-evaluate and see whether yes we want to be together in which case we move and start afresh (which is what we have been planning to do for a while and I'm quite happy to do, house has been on market for 6 months) or no we're better off apart etc. I'm still undecided but at least now we have some timescale to move towards. I think if we hadn't set a timescale we would just be in limbo. At least this way, by the end of the month,we can have a definate answer from both of us.
Hope everyone else is having a good day!!

kizzykizzywizzy

Go away for the day & loads happens!
Glad you had a good time with GOK - Gert!
Spoke to SIL today, she'd rung me to he how I was, I was a bit put out, might have got the wrong end of the stick, but I said he hasn't really rung them this week & she said that's because you told him not to - which i have never done, he may have presumed it, but I've never said that, also I think he's playing the feel sorry for me she's being a cow card! I said i'd bought some bits today, but I'd had to put money in from the b.soc to cover it & A Towers, I also said he can't be ringing the moose as he has no credit on his phone ( when he has rung here it's been from SIL or Mums ) she said I know he said he isn't taking any money ( poor him! ) he had some money saturday from his Mum, instead of taking it out of the bank, which was money for the kids shoes, so he Has got money now!!
He's making out I've stopped access, not let him phone & I'm spending all the money whilst he has none!!!
I was so wound up had to ring SFH to get it off my chest, or I would've rung him & gone mad & she's probably just got the wrong end of the stick anyway!

Rikki

Don't phone unless it concerns a problem with the children.

Be strong you know you can.

trancebabe

Of course he's going to tell the situation as he sees it hun... what else would he do? Be completely honest with everyone (eerrrr no!!!)

Let him say what he wants, you know the score and you haven't got a thing to prove to anyone!

... having said that, he has to have some money, no on can live on fresh air alone... he's got to be able to pay his way somehow...

dinkytwostep

Hi Kizzy
Can't believe how well you SFH and Gert have been doing. (sorry pc problems so can't always post!).

Do you think your OH is playing for the sympathy vote with his sister - so that he doesn't HAVE to move out of her house ? If he paints you as spending all the money then the impression is that he can't possibly afford to move anywhere...

..just wondering

DTS

Rikki

I found it useful to keep a note book and write things down for example; when he let the children down, anonymous phone calls, the blatant lies etc. It helped me to keep perspective and deal with them when I was of sound mind and not about to throw a wobbler and fly off the handle.

Deep breathes and little steps.

dinkytwostep

scottishfreebiehunter wrote: »

Well I got up this morning and heating was on ,confused as do not put it on at night ,went downstairs my tea cup was there from last night etc and lights were on,so basically I must have been sleep walking used to do it loads when younger and dad caught me boiling kettle:eek:
quote]


Hi SFH

If it's any consolation you're not the only one who goes sleep walking. One of my friends would always wake up to find the curtains pulled in her bedroom despite pulling them across before she would go to bed at night..... We reckoned "Any Dream will do" was written specially for her :rotfl: :rotfl:

I know it may not feel like it but you are coping brilliantly. Think back to how you were when you found out - now think how you are now... See the differences? Same goes for Kizzy and Gert and for the others on this thread

:T :T :T

dinkytwostep

SFH

"Ds said he hates his room as reminds him of daddy and all the times they played together" _pale__pale_


Just a thought - do you think you and DS could rearrange his room - maybe not redecorate it straight away 'cos of your trip to Oz...? New lampshade, maybe bed in different place.. maybe different covers?

Also .. is there any way DS could join a club? My sister sent my nephew to Tai Kwando and it really helped him to learn how to channel his anger and gave him a huge confidence boost.
Maybe judo or something like that would help.... so long as it doesn't cost a lot to start !!! ...

gerturdeanna

I may be doing okay but am still horribly confused even today, one pos I'm saying he can't change and I don't see a future, next post I'm talking about moving house completly to be with him for a fresh start!! How different can you get. I'm glad you are all here as a sounding board. Bella from the compers inn hasjust found out today that her fella has cheated for the second time, she thinks it's all going to kick off. Hope we can send her our love and wishes. And I hope she doesn't mind me telling people on here?!?! I have told her about this thread so she may join us aswell!!