Marriage over don't know where to start

gerturdeanna

Just been through the websites visited today history thing to see if he'd been checking my email or whatever - sooooo many !!!!!! sites!! I can't believe he's been looking at them with the kids in the house and awake!! At least wait till they are in bed! Everyday I think I know him less!!

jay11_2

Aaw gert, that's awful, do the kids use the pc at all?

gerturdeanna

No not at all!! They are only 4 and 3. They like dancing to youtube, but they don't use it themselves no.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry, confront him or not?!?!

trancebabe

Aww Gert - Leopards find it so hard to change their spots hunny - you probably know him better than you're letting on (which is why you're checking the PC history in the first place)
HUGS!

Jay - I'd probably be having it out with my OH before I started messaging anyone else tbh. They may have taken their messages off line so to speak (emailing in private for example)

Keeping_Motivated

Gert personally I would ask him about it, not on the phone or in an angry way but I would tell him I knew and see if it opened up discussions face to face.

How was his attitude with you before he left today?

jillie1974

gerturdeanna wrote: »

Jillie, yes it was the Key 103 meet!! It was great!! He is amazing - such an empowering person!! Just listening to him was amazing!! Got his autograph and a piccie together - when I can find the leads for the camera - I'll post them up!!

glad youhad a great time. did you get loads of good tips and advice??

gerturdeanna

He's not left yet - he's meant to be spending time with DD whilst DS is at school. He did painting with DS, but so far has done nothing with DD. He's snoring on the sofa as we speak!! Why did I think he could/would change? Obv there is no future - I can't be with a man who would treat me like sh1te by cheating on me, surfs !!!!!! whilst his kids are awake in the house and falls asleep when he's meant to be playing with his daughter!! So true about Leopards never changing their spots!!

jay11_2

Gert I'd try to seperate out the porno from the other stuff in your mind, how would you have felt about him viewing it before all the problems? Some women don't see it as an issue, (all those magazines men used to have!!) whereas messing around with another woman is something else again.

Though he needs to be a LOT more discreet with kids around, lots of 4 year olds are pretty savvy if they've been encouraged/taught to use PC's, thank god yours haven't!! And viewing while they're awake bldy hll!!!!!

Pollycat

Oh dear Gert, that's quite a disturbing discovery.

I agree with KM about bringing it out into the open, see what his reaction is.
I've never been in this position (probably only because the internet didn't exist when I was with my ex - iyswim) but I wouldn't have thought it was something that you could let drop without trying to get to the bottom of it.
Are the visits to these websites very recent?

Jay
How did your friend find out about these 'chats'?
Why did they stop a few weeks ago? Did she find out?
What has her OH said about it?

jay11_2

Pollycat wrote: »

Jay
How did your friend find out about these 'chats'?
Why did they stop a few weeks ago? Did she find out?
What has her OH said about it?

He let something slip and she confronted him, he stopped because they were a slip up/he was led on:rolleyes: , he's sorry.