Marriage over don't know where to start

Skint_Lynne

bank_of_slate wrote: »

...Linda xx

He is :cool: .

SLxx

SingleSue

Thanks everyone for your kind words.....you almost had a tough old bird like me in tears! :rotfl:

Kizzy, those same thoughts about being left on the shelf, destined to be single for ever are still there for me and growing stronger every day that I am single.

I am always saying "Who on earth would take me on with 3 kids, especially my 2 disabled ones (kids from hell anyone? :rotfl: )"

Mind you, I then banish those thoughts from my head and look ahead to the future when the children will not be children anymore and my life will be mine again - although always at the back of my mind is the doctor saying that the 2 younger ones will never be able to lead completely independent lives, I try not to think about that.

You will have days where you feel sh1tty, unloved, unwanted - that is to be expected. It is still very early days for you and the confusion and hurt is still very raw - my head was all over the place and my mood up and down like a yo yo in the early days.

It DOES get better, you DO start to feel more positive but it DOES take time, as someone else said, it is like a bereavement and there are an awful lot of stages to bereavement.

In the meantime, anytime you want to talk just send me a pm.... I may be scary (to some!) but we can possibly help each other.

kizzykizzywizzy

Thanks, I really don't feel good at all today, I've now got it in my head that HE HAS cheated, why I have now reverted to that, I don't know!!
I feel as though I am going mad, I can't concentrate on anything or get anything done.
He's coming around at 6pm & I'm so nervous

Buffythedebtslayer

Hey sugar ((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))

Right now your brain is going at a 100 miles an hour. What ever has happening the hard part is that you actually don't know. I know it is impossible but try not to think that he has cheated on you or he hasn't he does love you or he doesn't. Until he says anything about why you don't know why.

THis is the worst not knowing - in my opinion any way once oyu have a Thing to be mad about or focus on solving it is much easier (a relative term) to deal with.

I Wish so much I could be there with you and give you a really big hug.

I will be here all night (again!!) so will be keeping an eye on your thread.

buffyxx

kizzykizzywizzy

Thanks Buffy, I've probably had the worst day yet!
Spoke to my Sister & she was cheated on for 2 years by her EX & she said if the phone rang it might be a signal for him to call someone!
Then she started on about, whether he was working all the weekends he couldn't come off his ship, she hasn't helped at all.
But then I think, is that just because I don't want to believe it??
Also if it was someone from his ship, she's probably still on there & getting a phone signal is difficult, so she could be ringing to say she has one.
Also bl**dy work have given him email now, so he could be emailing her all day.
What if he goes & lives wherever she lives, he says he'll be about for the kids, but he may not be, perhaps he could afford to pay for everything, if he's thinking of moving in with someone.
I just don't know....................

Buffythedebtslayer

crikey my first thought was that it might him ringing you?

Odette

Without any concrete evidence, thinking like that Kizzy is going to drive you mad and make you act in a way that could be seen as negative to him, not that thats a bad thing the way hes treating you, but you need to be strong.
Much love x

(goes back to lurking)

Buffythedebtslayer

and you are getting ahad you yourself a bit - I would be doing and have done exactly the same thing tho. its just too difficult not to.

hang in there hon xxx

colnkits

Have been following your thread and haven't known what to say, but just wanted to say I'm thinking about you and hope you're ok.

Keeping_Motivated

Could you give him an ultimatum when he comes round and say if he has nothing to hide let you read his texts. He won't then have time to delete them? Tell him you are going through enough and need your mind reassuring that it is definately not coz of someone else.

KM x