Single and in debt.

sarahb123_3

makeup wrote: »

I'm also really forgetful and seriously need that book that Susu was recommending as went to two shopping expeditions over weekend and failed on each occasion to buy a birthday card for my Dad. Finally remembered today only because I actually wrote a list and put it on it...when I remembered...

Mine arrived this morning, am having a quick look through it, will read later and report back. Hooray to never forgetting anything again!

bathgatebuyer

Books are soooo essential! I finished off my Robert Wagner book last night and started the Roger Moore one on the bus this morning. I'm not a great one for fiction as I can never really get into the whole make believe thing. Biographies are really my thing.

Books and music are my two big collections. I have about 1200 albums which take up quite a bit of room in a 2-bed flat! Chuck in 9 guitars, a double bass, keyboard and you can see why I sometimes feel like I'm tripping over myself!!! Was taking to someone at work today who was telling me that they too chuck their books out once they are finished, "Once you've read them, why keep them?" What?! I've still got 4 years worth of Uni books from a decade back!!

makeup

TDQO wrote: »

Bleurgh... I'm hungover and had two arguments with the ex, now she's blocked me on FB and it looks like I won't see her before I go back to Oz... how do I manage this?

What do you want to happen?

Do you want to see her before you go back??

I guess it depends on what the arguments were about and if you feel able to step down. If you want to leave things on good terms you could send an apologetic text or call her and apologise.

Is she normally liable to fly off the handle and do things like block you on FB? If so, she might calm down and change her mind about it.

Good luck!

mags33_2

I agree with makeup if you want to see her before you go back maybe an apology and making up would be a good idea

my work is poop sick of changing other peoples mistakes

sighs i so want crisps

Ossireo

Sorry I haven't joined in recent conversations, being a bit of a sad b@stard at the moment in all honesty . I am actually finding sorting through my ex's place sort of tough. Its like having a rummage into your past and not all in a good way, feel rather mentally drained every time I go up there. Did find a box today full of a load of my old books and CDs which I will probably keep for a while as I plan on having a nice few shelves in my lounge.... and my Eternal Beau tea set, though not sure where the rest of it is (was my wedding china). Another depressing thing is having to trash all of the rather expensive baby stuff (I left the home when DS was 6 months old) as its all cobwebbed and rusty in parts as it was never cleaned before ex put it in the garage (DS had reflux till he was 13 months old so you can imagine why it was rusty!) .. the place is also a shrine to the fact I lived off credit, so much expensive wasted stuff that I am most likely still paying for somewhere in amongst the many loans over the last 10 years :rolleyes: which exDH has clearly kept up considering there is a gym quality weights bench and gear in the garage and 2 expensive guitars in the house! (wonder if he would actually notice if I sold them all considering he hasn't been in tehhouse for over 2 years lol!)

Also there was a letter delivered from his mortgage company stating he is 2 months in arrears .. which also concerns me (yes shouldn't be opening his post but he told me to do what I want with any mail as he has the important stuff at his mums house!). He told me his December wage was swallowed by HSBC when they cancelled his overdraft as that was why he couldn't give me any maintenance or return the £80 he has owed me for 6 months which I was hoping to have for xmas!, but he should have seen the benefit of his full wage in January as HSBC also cancelled all the DD's & SO's which out of pure ignorance/ability he would not have arranged to pay himself (which is the reason he has 4 years Council tax arrears and 3 years Water Rates arrears - if for some reason the DD's stop .. he does nothing about it .. he has always been a 'draw cash out till the machine says no' kind of guy, which I didn't help as I did all the finances as he was clueless when we were together)... so am I moving into a place that may well be repossessed if he is just failing to make payments, and I cant even talk to him about it as finding the scarlet pimpernel would be easier as he avoids 'chats' like the plague :mad:

Really shouldn't be waffling all this, but you know how it is I suppose, I just want to get it out and I have no one I can really talk to these days since I am not in work etc

Oh there is something to distract me ... DS came home with a note from his teacher asking me to come in and see him about DS and DS has no idea why although he is adament that he hasnt done anything bad

mags33_2

Ossireo wrote: »

Sorry I haven't joined in recent conversations, being a bit of a sad b@stard at the moment in all honesty . I am actually finding sorting through my ex's place sort of tough. Its like having a rummage into your past and not all in a good way, feel rather mentally drained every time I go up there. Did find a box today full of a load of my old books and CDs which I will probably keep for a while as I plan on having a nice few shelves in my lounge.... and my Eternal Beau tea set, though not sure where the rest of it is (was my wedding china). Another depressing thing is having to trash all of the rather expensive baby stuff (I left the home when DS was 6 months old) as its all cobwebbed and rusty in parts as it was never cleaned before ex put it in the garage (DS had reflux till he was 13 months old so you can imagine why it was rusty!) .. the place is also a shrine to the fact I lived off credit, so much expensive wasted stuff that I am most likely still paying for somewhere in amongst the many loans over the last 10 years :rolleyes: which exDH has clearly kept up considering there is a gym quality weights bench and gear in the garage and 2 expensive guitars in the house! (wonder if he would actually notice if I sold them all considering he hasn't been in tehhouse for over 2 years lol!)

Also there was a letter delivered from his mortgage company stating he is 2 months in arrears .. which also concerns me (yes shouldn't be opening his post but he told me to do what I want with any mail as he has the important stuff at his mums house!). He told me his December wage was swallowed by HSBC when they cancelled his overdraft as that was why he couldn't give me any maintenance or return the £80 he has owed me for 6 months which I was hoping to have for xmas!, but he should have seen the benefit of his full wage in January as HSBC also cancelled all the DD's & SO's which out of pure ignorance/ability he would not have arranged to pay himself (which is the reason he has 4 years Council tax arrears and 3 years Water Rates arrears - if for some reason the DD's stop .. he does nothing about it .. he has always been a 'draw cash out till the machine says no' kind of guy, which I didn't help as I did all the finances as he was clueless when we were together)... so am I moving into a place that may well be repossessed if he is just failing to make payments, and I cant even talk to him about it as finding the scarlet pimpernel would be easier as he avoids 'chats' like the plague :mad:

Really shouldn't be waffling all this, but you know how it is I suppose, I just want to get it out and I have no one I can really talk to these days since I am not in work etc

Oh there is something to distract me ... DS came home with a note from his teacher asking me to come in and see him about DS and DS has no idea why although he is adament that he hasnt done anything bad

its good to talk though especially on here as everyone is so helpful and understanding. gets it off your chest as well.

Maybe the news abour DS isnt bad? maybe they do know but not wanting to say untill teacher tells you. goodness knows i know i used to tell my parents it wasnt anything bad as it gave me 24 hours before my row lol

all i can suggest to help is have a relaxing night and do something that you enjoy doing and pamper yourself as much and as cheaply as you can lol

it wouldnt of been nice having to rummage through all that it must of brought back so many memories

TDQO

makeup wrote: »

What do you want to happen?

Do you want to see her before you go back??

I guess it depends on what the arguments were about and if you feel able to step down. If you want to leave things on good terms you could send an apologetic text or call her and apologise.

Is she normally liable to fly off the handle and do things like block you on FB? If so, she might calm down and change her mind about it.

Good luck!

No I did back down and apologise to her but she said she's had enough and doesn't want to sree me or hear from me.

On the plus side I can actually move on and forget about her.

Mmmmm books, I love reading, have spent a small fortune in Oz on new and used books. I'll read anything at all as long as it's well written and I can happily read a good enough book 5-6 times.

mags33_2

awww

sometimes closure is for the best at least you know where you stand and you go back to oz knowing this

sarahb123_3

Ossireo wrote: »

Sorry I haven't joined in recent conversations, being a bit of a sad b@stard at the moment in all honesty . I am actually finding sorting through my ex's place sort of tough. Its like having a rummage into your past and not all in a good way, feel rather mentally drained every time I go up there. Did find a box today full of a load of my old books and CDs which I will probably keep for a while as I plan on having a nice few shelves in my lounge.... and my Eternal Beau tea set, though not sure where the rest of it is (was my wedding china). Another depressing thing is having to trash all of the rather expensive baby stuff (I left the home when DS was 6 months old) as its all cobwebbed and rusty in parts as it was never cleaned before ex put it in the garage (DS had reflux till he was 13 months old so you can imagine why it was rusty!) .. the place is also a shrine to the fact I lived off credit, so much expensive wasted stuff that I am most likely still paying for somewhere in amongst the many loans over the last 10 years :rolleyes: which exDH has clearly kept up considering there is a gym quality weights bench and gear in the garage and 2 expensive guitars in the house! (wonder if he would actually notice if I sold them all considering he hasn't been in tehhouse for over 2 years lol!)

Also there was a letter delivered from his mortgage company stating he is 2 months in arrears .. which also concerns me (yes shouldn't be opening his post but he told me to do what I want with any mail as he has the important stuff at his mums house!). He told me his December wage was swallowed by HSBC when they cancelled his overdraft as that was why he couldn't give me any maintenance or return the £80 he has owed me for 6 months which I was hoping to have for xmas!, but he should have seen the benefit of his full wage in January as HSBC also cancelled all the DD's & SO's which out of pure ignorance/ability he would not have arranged to pay himself (which is the reason he has 4 years Council tax arrears and 3 years Water Rates arrears - if for some reason the DD's stop .. he does nothing about it .. he has always been a 'draw cash out till the machine says no' kind of guy, which I didn't help as I did all the finances as he was clueless when we were together)... so am I moving into a place that may well be repossessed if he is just failing to make payments, and I cant even talk to him about it as finding the scarlet pimpernel would be easier as he avoids 'chats' like the plague :mad:

Ossireo, I really feel for you that sounds awful, always seems to happen that everything comes along at once. You should know by now that it's fine to come on here for a waffle! It's what I do, this is my own personal rant thread! Can you offer to set all the dds/sos for him if that is an option? I know it'a a pain and he should be doing it himself but as you say he seems unable to do it (and he seemed quite happy to leave it all to you before:mad: ) and you will ultimately benefit from it. Can't believe he has 4 years CT arrears:eek: I thought people went to prison for that!

I know it must feel really s****y having to go through your old life like that, but think how brilliant it will be when you finally get to make your own mark on the place. it's just a rubbishy phase you have to go through but there is light at the end of the tunnel. Try to focus on that- really difficult, I know- and you will get there. Think how far you've come in the last year, moving house, losing weight, meeting SC etc. You can do it! You've got yourself through lots of things and you will get through this too. xxx

runmichellerun

Oh no. Just told my friend that I like Forbidden Man, and now he's even more forbidden because she is REALLY not happy with the idea.

I'm still seeing him Friday night though. Just not telling her about it. Have decided that there's no need for her to know unless it starts going really really well. If it doesn't work out then she has no reason to know anything.

Before you all warn me, I absolutely know that this is not a good idea. But I think life isn't worth living unless the odd chance is taken and this is one I'm willing to take. I still have a feeling of dread, mixed in with the nervousness / excitement of the date :eek: :j :eek: :beer: :eek: :j :eek: :beer: