Single and in debt.

Ossireo

Welcome new folk :hello:

Lula - totally agree with the others, I think as long as honesty and cards are on table so to speak then all is well, go forth and have fun xx

I also agree on the ex and contact that was mentioned. I do have to erase someone from my life to help me get over them, else I will be liable to send a little 'oh hey, how are you' text of email This is partly why I am so surprised that I am seeing SC again as its totally against all my normal behaviour!

Weighed today, so that puts me at 4.5lb gain over the last 3 weeks, which I am not upset with considering what I have shoved in my mouth these last few weeks ... I have felt like a true scrounger as I have been fed by other people a lot New start though, back on diet (and SC has joined the class I go to as well so no excuses anymore!) and raring to go to be a smaller me by end of year!

PinkTwirl

Hi,

I work in a place where everyone is married. I feel really down when they are all talking about their husbands and wives and children (3 of them are the same age as me). They are a great bunch of people and I like their company (maybe why they are all married, however they employed me so I wonder if I am really that crap in the whole people sense!)

It just gets me down and I really want to run away when I hear them talk about all this stuff. I'm 32 on Sunday!:(

I hope all is well with everyone

makeup

SuSu1871 wrote: »

I am in a state of "least expecting it" - isn't that when it comes & bites you on the bum?! :rotfl:

This really reminds me of a sketch show that was on ages ago, with David Baddiel and Rob Skinner (I think that was his name....) and they had this recurring sketch where the guy would get invited out to something and he would be about to say no and then would get a kind of flash-forward to his future and telling the grandkids 'well I was invited to go xxxxx and wasn't going to go but that was the night I met your grandmother' And then every week the scenario would get more and more ridiculous. I think it ended up with a night of rampage and cannabilism..


That really struck a chord with me as I am always thinking 'oh maybe this is when I will meet someone.' I always used to have high hopes in the office whenever a new man was starting.

Pink - try not to let it get you down. I worked in an office once with just four of us - my married male boss (who was having an affair) and two other women. They were older than me and I got on brilliantly with both of them and we chatted about our lives all the time so I heard a lot about their OH's and in a way I was a bit jealous of this 'domestic bliss'. Then we had our Xmas party and they were both there and were both unbelievable d**kheads and I instantly felt sorry for them having to live with such idiots!!!!

Do you have any birthday plans???

PinkTwirl

makeup wrote: »

Pink - try not to let it get you down. I worked in an office once with just four of us - my married male boss (who was having an affair) and two other women. They were older than me and I got on brilliantly with both of them and we chatted about our lives all the time so I heard a lot about their OH's and in a way I was a bit jealous of this 'domestic bliss'. Then we had our Xmas party and they were both there and were both unbelievable d**kheads and I instantly felt sorry for them having to live with such idiots!!!!

Do you have any birthday plans???

Hey thanks,

I know you can never tell what goes on behind closed doors, I suppose it's because my confidence is taking a pounding at the moment. I wake up in the mornings thinking I'm a failure because I always judge myself against what I want to achieve and feel I should have achieved it all by now, although I would never think it of anyone else. When they talk about their new kids it upsets me as I'd love to be in that position now. God I hate my ex for doing this (or not doing this if you know what I mean).

In terms of birthday, I'm meeting my aunt for lunch. I mentioned it to a friend, but she said nothing. But I've realised she's more of an acquaintance really.

Sorry if I sound a bit crap

SuSu1871

PinkTwirl wrote: »

I wake up in the mornings thinking I'm a failure because I always judge myself against what I want to achieve and feel I should have achieved it all by now

Pinky, you need to STOP DOING THIS!!! Think about all the things you have achieved instead. You've got a job and you're dealing with your debts, so you're a lot better off than a lot of people on this dirty old sphere we call the world.

So, your colleagues are married with kids? You know what? You've got something in SPADEFULS that they don't have - freedom!! You have freedom to do whatever you want whenever you want to. That isn't something you should take for granted.

And you know what else? I bet they're dead jealous of you when they get woken up four times in the night to change pee-soaked bedding or sooth the kids through teething. Or when their husbands come home p!ssed after a night out with the lads and they have to wake up to a stinky fart machine!!

I never feel jealous of my friends and their husbands/kids/pregnancies. I feel happy for them because they're my friends and if they're happy, I'm happy. When we meet up for dinner they love to hear tales of crushes and failed pursuits of unsuitable men because, well, it's funny if you don't take it too seriously! Can't wait to tell them about my textual exploits with DT over Christmas :rotfl:

I'm sorry if I seem harsh, but the life you have now is the life you have now. Don't waste it thinking about what you could/should/would have if this/that/the other had/hadn't happened (see how confusing that is to read?! It's way more confusing to live your life like that!)

So your life gave you lemons? Make lemonade!!

TDQO

SuSu1871 wrote: »

SBC!!!! TDQO!!!! Where are you when we need a male perspective?!!!

Why are blokes like this? Why do we let them get to us when they're probably oblivious to the whole female anguish and over-analysis that we are genetically programmed to do?

And they say we're the ones that are difficult to understand...

Sorry I was busy getting rid of the crazy stalker girl I slept with on NYE... naturally I only found out about the crazy stalker thing 24hrs after we did the dirty lol.

I'm officially available for male perspective etc from now on...

SuSu1871

TDQO wrote: »

Sorry I was busy getting rid of the crazy stalker girl I slept with on NYE... naturally I only found out about the crazy stalker thing 24hrs after we did the dirty lol.

I'm officially available for male perspective etc from now on...

Hiya! :hello:

So, I'm interested.... What, from a male perspective, constitutes a crazy stalker? What did she do?

Note that this is for research purposes only, not cos I'm nosey :rolleyes:

TDQO

SuSu1871 wrote: »

Hiya! :hello:

So, I'm interested.... What, from a male perspective, constitutes a crazy stalker? What did she do?

Note that this is for research purposes only, not cos I'm nosey :rolleyes:

Basically I'd only met her once before NYE and we get along really well as friends but after a few pints on NYE she was all over me, she had to be holding my hand and when we were sat down she kept draping her legs over me and kissing my shoulder when we hadn't even kissed yet!!
After the deed she was just very clingy and didn't want me to leave. When I told her that I didn't want anything more than friendship due to my massive issues with my ex she got very angry and depressive and laid on the guilt trip. I'm just very glad that I told her when we did as I reckon if I'd slept with her again then she would have moved to Oz just to see me again!:eek:

makeup

PinkTwirl wrote: »

I suppose it's because my confidence is taking a pounding at the moment. I wake up in the mornings thinking I'm a failure because I always judge myself against what I want to achieve and feel I should have achieved it all by now, although I would never think it of anyone else.
In terms of birthday, I'm meeting my aunt for lunch. I mentioned it to a friend, but she said nothing. But I've realised she's more of an acquaintance really.

Sorry if I sound a bit crap

Hey Pink

Please try to stop being so hard on yourself - you have come out of something very difficult and hard to deal with. Despite all that you are working on clearing your debts and you have got rid of people who weren't good for you. You HAVE achieved so much already! Sometimes I get hard on myself and get upset about my failings but I try to imagine if I was a friend of mine and what advice I would give. I would never be so harsh on a friend. So imagine someone else wrote your post - what would you say to them????

I turned 33 last birthday and the year before 31 going into 32 was really hard - I struggled a lot but I got through it and now I have managed to improve things and feel much more positive.

My situation was different to yours but I felt really down and struggled to see how things would get better but they did in the end. And believe me, i'm nothing special, normally I don't achieve half the things I set out to achieve.

I'm glad you're seeing your aunt for lunch, that sounds like a nice thing to do - but I hope the weather improves a bit for you - still at least it is sunny!

TDQO - I agree with Susu, would be good to hear what constitutes stalker behaviour. Obviously i've never done anything stalkerish at all, no not at all, never, :rolleyes:

SuSu1871

Yep, she's a stalker!! :rotfl:

You're well rid, TDQO. Hope she doesn't know where you live!