If not for my sister and her kids I'd have given it all up - but I'm still here!!!

piglet29

Mupeteer wrote: »

Thanks piglet, I'm doing really well just now. Sorry I haven't been around on the owls much but I've been away flirting on another website!
Just chatting to people and making friends (not at the expense of those of you on the owls of course!) and generally having a laugh. I'm struggling to believe how much better I feel about everything in such a short space of time.

And I get to collect my dog tomorrow!:T I got home yesterday to find a card made by my neice for her, welcoming her to her new home. There were also a couple of presents for her. I think my neices are as excited as I am.

Hi muppet, sooooooo glad you are feeling so much better and hope you got to pick up your new ikkle doggie today, dont forget we wanna see pics of him/her mind ok

Catch up with you soon babe xxx;)

Herewegoagain

Hiya mupet,
Hoz things with the new diggie hon, having fun with him/her
Happy birthday, wish we could have been there, cheers hon,
sorry I wasn't around when you were you were feeling down, PM if you like, and where the pic's of your new friend love and hugs xx :beer:

Mupeteer

Its been a while since i've posted on this thread so time for an update.

My devastation at the break up of my relationship has passed and I'm even seeing someone else. He's lovely but tonight I'm feeling a bit crap about it. We've spent the last few nights together and, when I asked him if he wanted company tonight, he said that it was up to me but i've been spending loads on petrol going to his. I know that's a perfectly reasonable thing to say and he is just thinking about me but it didn't feel very nice. We're both knackered and could do with an early night anyway. Rationally I know these things but since when have I ever been rational.
I checked my money situation earlier and its really bad. My step dad is going to give me some money every month when I'm at uni but I feel terrible taking it. He doesn't yet know about my debts and has asked how much I'll need. What do I say? I hate taking money from him, especially when the crappy financial situation I'm in is all of my own making.
I hate this time of year and I know that is probably colouring the way I'm feeling about everything. I just feel pants. Tomorrow night will be 4 years since my mum died and I'm still having trouble dealing with that. I have never stopped missing her but I kust find it so much more difficult to deal with at this time of year.
Positive note (I must have one) - my dog is fantastic (most of the time). She's getting me out of the house and keeping me company. I have no regrets about getting her.

Wol2

Mupeteer wrote: »

Its been a while since i've posted on this thread so time for an update.

My devastation at the break up of my relationship has passed and I'm even seeing someone else. He's lovely but tonight I'm feeling a bit crap about it. We've spent the last few nights together and, when I asked him if he wanted company tonight, he said that it was up to me but i've been spending loads on petrol going to his. I know that's a perfectly reasonable thing to say and he is just thinking about me but it didn't feel very nice. We're both knackered and could do with an early night anyway. Rationally I know these things but since when have I ever been rational.
I checked my money situation earlier and its really bad. My step dad is going to give me some money every month when I'm at uni but I feel terrible taking it. He doesn't yet know about my debts and has asked how much I'll need. What do I say? I hate taking money from him, especially when the crappy financial situation I'm in is all of my own making.
I hate this time of year and I know that is probably colouring the way I'm feeling about everything. I just feel pants. Tomorrow night will be 4 years since my mum died and I'm still having trouble dealing with that. I have never stopped missing her but I kust find it so much more difficult to deal with at this time of year.
Positive note (I must have one) - my dog is fantastic (most of the time). She's getting me out of the house and keeping me company. I have no regrets about getting her.

Hugs HUn

Tomorrow, give your wee doggie an extra hug..and ring me if you want. (I'll PM my phone number) It's an important day for you.

We'll deal with the BF thing later .

Hugs Hun,,,stay strong..you;ve done really well this far....
Wol2
xxx

frugallass

Mupeteer wrote: »

Tomorrow night will be 4 years since my mum died and I'm still having trouble dealing with that. I have never stopped missing her but I kust find it so much more difficult to deal with at this time of year.
Positive note (I must have one) - my dog is fantastic (most of the time). She's getting me out of the house and keeping me company. I have no regrets about getting her.

You're doing really well - be proud of yourself !

With regards to your mum, take some time to sit and remember the really good times - cry buckets if you want - think about her brilliant qualities, things that made you proud of her and the lovely qualities that she has passed on to you.

My mum is still alive but she lives quite a distance from me which means I don't see her as often as I would like, when I miss her I have a body lotion that reminds me of her and I put it on my hands, close my eyes and smell..... and remember.

Mupeteer

I'm trying to make the best of a horrible day. I found it really difficult to haul my backside out of bed this morning but at least I knew I was spending some time with my sister later on. We went shopping and I bought a pair of jeans (really bad, I know, but at least they were only £10).

When I got home I called my step dad to talk about money. It was really horrible. I told him how much (over an above loan) that I need to survive on each month. I feel so terrible taking money from him and had pared it down to the absolute minimum, not really allowing myself any kind of life or even a margin for error. Anyway, he said that he doubted that was enough and that he'll be putting £200 into my account each month. He is a total lifesaver. I am determined that any money left at the end of the month will be paid straight to my debts.

He also asked about those and I have never mentioned them to him before so I guess my sister must have said something. He wants to know how much debt I have but I said I'd rather not tell him as it's my mess to deal with. I know he would be so disappointed in me and I couldn't handle that. So he's accepted that I wont tell him for the time being but has asked me to think again about it.

I've told him I will be looking for a part-time weekend job and he says that, even if I do work, he'll continue to help me out.

To think that my mum was always really concerned that my sister and I would struggle when she died. She couldn't have asked for more from my step-dad. He is truly fantastic.

I intended to go the the cemetery today but haven't been and I feel bad about that. It's too long since I've been up. But it's so hard, I just sit there on the grass in front of her headstone and cry my eyes out. I'm doing the crying bit now anyway. I miss her so much. She died at about 1 in the morning so technically it's tomorrow that it'll be four years but this whole weekend is horrible. We spent from the Friday morning until she died in the early hours of Monday morning in the hospice with her.

This is definitely the worst weekend of the year as far as I am concerned.

RAS

Mupeteer

It is so hard those first few years. I got a really down feeling for about a month every year.

technically does not matter, it is how you feel.

I know you spent some time with your sister and spoke to your step-dad today, but have you told him how truly fantastic he is?

I bet he is finding today difficult too and to know that you think so highly of him would be a great gift at this time.

And who are you going to be with over the weekend?

Mupeteer

Thanks RAS, I should tell him how I feel. I know he's having a rough time now too.

This weekend - was hoping to go and see the guy I started seeing recently but he's out with his daughter so that's out. So tonight - no one. Tomorrow I will go to the cemetery and am supposed to be out with friends at night. Only I know how bad I feel at this time of year and I don't want to ruin the night out, especially as it's one of my friends birthday. Don't know what to do.

RAS

Hi

So tonight you can party on here??

Or is there a favourite DVD or TV programme you would like to watch, all curled up with the mutt?

Tomorrow, is it a major outing, or could you go for the early part and come away early if you are feeling rough?

penguin83

Hi Muppet just wanted to give you a big hug - cant offer much advice sorry but I do great hugs!

Dont forget Night Owls if you are up late tonight x x x