Breast feeding, pros and cons

thatgirlsam

jimmy i do agree with that post - i don't think anyone is trying to argue that formula is in fact better than breast..

we do provide information where i work.. and then people can make an informed choice.. we would be failing them if we did not give the info..

the problem is that sometimes some people do come across as very sanctimonious and pompous when talking about bf.. as if they are indeed better mums and this can be off putting.. (as most us parents like to think we do the best we can)

im not accusing you of this, but i have come across this so many times..

i would just like to add again, breast is best!

AnnieM_3

JimmyTheWig wrote: »

Lets use another analogy.
The natural way for a human body to process urine is with kidneys.
An alternative way is with a dialysis machine.
This alternative is an inferior alternative. There can be no doubt about that.

By saying that I am not being mean to someone on dialysis. But it is a fact.
And if someone was deciding whether to swap their perfectly working kidneys for a dialysis machine I would suggest they didn't because it wouldn't be as good.
A dialysis machine _isn't_ inferior to kidneys that don't function. But in the majority of cases a dialysis machine _is_ inferior.

I was going to have a go you for being so patronising, but I can't really be bothered

As for you saying it's not about being 'mean', I found your earlier comment about FF being 'harmful', and putting it in the same context as smoking during pregnancy extremely ill-judged and, frankly, rather offensive. I'm sure any woman who can't breastfeed would be upset by it. Yes, perhaps breastmilk is preferable, but you need to understand how bandying about words such as 'harmful' and 'inferior' can affect people. Apart from anything, trying to force the issue down people's throats only makes them hostile towards your cause!

I do agree that donated breastmilk for babies of mothers who want to but can't is a fantastic idea.

neverdespairgirl

AnnieM wrote: »

My gripe was that you said it was inferior to the 'healthy norm'. You make it sound like mums who ff might as well feed their baby toxic waste!

Annie, I think that's something you are inferring, not something I'm implying.

The organic, home-grown, cooked-out-of-the-ground food example another poster mentioned is a similar one. We can't all do it. But that doesn't mean it might very well not be the best option.

neverdespairgirl

starbump wrote: »

Your post made me feel sad. Of course, you're not a bad mom - or anyone else who can't breast-feed. I think it's more like infant formula milk is your second choice, after ruling out your first choice (breast-milk) for whatever personal reasons.

I agree with you completely.

neverdespairgirl

AnnieM wrote: »

I do agree that donated breastmilk for babies of mothers who want to but can't is a fantastic idea.

There are milk banks, but I think they are mostly for premature babies (where breastmilk is particularly important).

Hell_Dans_Un_Handcart

AnnieM wrote: »

Right.... Gloves off... :mad: I realise I may get flamed for this, but I feel I have to say something.

I am utterly appalled at some of the coments on here:

1. My friend is sorry she didn't try to bf as her son now has allergies
2. Formula feeding is akin to smoking in pregnancy/around the baby
3. FF is inferior to the healthy norm

How dare you try to make mothers who either choose not to bf, or CANNOT bf feel inferior, humiliated, stupid, cruel, neglectful etc etc etc.

I have tried to keep an open mind reading through these posts, and my personal belief is that I would like to bf when the time comes. However, due to medical issues I am not willing to share here for identity reasons, I may not be able to. This won't mean I am a bad mother, whatever some of you here think.

Does it give you a happy sense of self-righteousness knowing there may be (for example) a woman who has had her breasts removed due to cancer reading this thread, who now feels totally miserable because you have made her out to be a bad mother because she will have to FF?

Why don't you think before you type?

Maybe breastmilk is the best, but you should not try an denigrate those who disagree with your personal preference.

Formula was designed for, and is there for, those mums you speak of. It saves their lives. Nobody thinks that is a bad thing or thinks less of those mums Some of us beat ourselves up because we didn't have natural births, for example - but just because we can't control these things, doesn't mean that we should be angry about other people saying natural birth is ideal for most women. I get very sad and disappointed in myself when I read about women who had perfect births...but hey, I did everything I could. I couldn't have done anymore and I don't resent those women.

I commented on another post recently about the idea of a prescription-only system for formula. It would have its pitfalls, certainly, but on the plus side, women who needed to FF would get specialist advice and perhaps not feel the need to defend themselves so much - people would know you'd got it because you needed it and might be more sensitive about the matter.

AnnieM_3

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

Annie, I think that's something you are inferring, not something I'm implying.

The organic, home-grown, cooked-out-of-the-ground food example another poster mentioned is a similar one. We can't all do it. But that doesn't mean it might very well not be the best option.

Put that way, it sounds far less negative towards non bf types

thatgirlsam

Hell_Dans_Un_Handcart wrote: »

Formula was designed for, and is there for, those mums you speak of. It saves their lives. Nobody thinks that is a bad thing or thinks less of those mums Some of us beat ourselves up because we didn't have natural births, for example - but just because we can't control these things, doesn't mean that we should be angry about other people saying natural birth is ideal for most women. I get very sad and disappointed in myself when I read about women who had perfect births...but hey, I did everything I could. I couldn't have done anymore and I don't resent those women.

I commented on another post recently about the idea of a prescription-only system for formula. It would have its pitfalls, certainly, but on the plus side, women who needed to FF would get specialist advice and perhaps not feel the need to defend themselves so much - people would know you'd got it because you needed it and might be more sensitive about the matter.

thats an interesting thought -
but what about the mums who do not want to breastfeed? instead of cannot..

do we force them to bf?
that is going to cause a real problem

thatgirlsam

plus some women may not want to explain their health problems to people who ask why they are ff their baby.. as it would be then obvious there was a problem..
some mums at our unit do not want their families to know about certain health issues

this would be removing choice..

AnnieM_3

Hell_Dans_Un_Handcart wrote: »

I commented on another post recently about the idea of a prescription-only system for formula. It would have its pitfalls, certainly, but on the plus side, women who needed to FF would get specialist advice and perhaps not feel the need to defend themselves so much - people would know you'd got it because you needed it and might be more sensitive about the matter.

I agree - that is a good idea. The problem would be that people have very different opinions on reasons for FF. I think expressing and milk banks should be used more, as alternatives to 'true' bf. I think most mums would be happy to give their baby breastmilk over formula, whether it was their own or someone else's (does it have to be screened for health issues?) just like wetnurses were employed in times gone by. That seems like a good compromise.

I feel a lot more positive about this thread now!