dementia and re inforcement

Merrywidow

Thanks Errata - she is being treated for the UTI. I too can initiate a conversation. Yesterday I pulled her back to earth by asking her the name of her bridesmaid - quick as a flash I had the answer - and two minutes later she is telling me that the nursing home weren't feeding her and although we were outside in the sunshine she thought she was still in bed awaiting her breakfast. Its all so very sad. I am loath to approach the home about her possible dementia as I know for a fact that they ship them out and where she is is so perfect and the staff are all lovely and I know for a fact she couldn't cope with another change. Let's just hope its the UTI, but deep down I know it goes deeper.

pickle

By correcting him and telling him over and over it's not going to change anything. The short-term memory will still be there so it does seem cruel to make him relive the loss constantly. The best thing to do I would think would be to take photos of his childhood (before his mum died) if there are any so that he has some point of reference and you can share his memories. If he goes back to hospital perhaps it would help to tell the staff about the fire and how distressed he is if they try to remind him where he is. I'm sure they'd take it on board if they knew. The staff themselves would have mixed views about this one. You can only do what you think is best for him, as long as he's happy then surely that's the main thing.

EdInvestor

Article no 2 :

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/main.jhtml?xml=/health/2008/07/29/hdementia129.xml

The whole book sounds like it will be well worth reading.

Kelinik

(Sorry to butt in but I just posted this in the arms and someone pointed me at this thread.)

I'm hoping to pick the brains of anyone who has experience dealing with old age dementia.

Its my grandad, he's late 70's, has a large amount of mobility and health problems and is cared for my my Nan. She's very much a tough-as-old-boots, just-get-on-with-it type of person which is what makes the situation we are in now all the more scary. Grandad has been having confused spells for a while now but so infrequent and lasting so short a time that nobody but Nan had seen it and she wasn't too worried. Then last weekend he turned on her, didn't know who she was and got verbally aggressive. She tried to muddle through not wanting to bother anyone :rolleyes: and by the time she finally called my Mum Saturday night she was in bits.

We've all had a long week. Mum stayed with them last weekend during which time they had an emergency doctor out who said there wasn't really anything they could do. Grandad did pick up but has been up and down since. During the week (mum works full time) myself, Nan's fab neighbour and one of mums sisters who happens to be over from Holland on holiday have split our time so that Nan hasn't had a whole day alone with Grandad as she is just not coping. We've had the doctor out, a nurse, spoken to social services but all we get is that yes there is a problem and he needs an assessment. We have no way of knowing if its going to be in a weeks time or a months and things are getting worse.

He had another really bad turn last night so Mum went round to stay the night, she has phoned me this morning to say Nan cannot be left with him at all now as she is at braking point. They've not had more than few hours broken sleep between them and Grandad is being verbally aggressive and refusing to co-operate (he needs everything doing for him). I don't know what to do, Mum has asked if I can phone round anyone that might be able to advise us and I've tried CAB and crossroads who our lovely aurora borealis recommended but neither of them are open. I'm honestly thinking we might just end up driving him to the hospital and refusing to leave until someone helps!

As you can tell we're getting pretty desperate, anyone know what else we can try?

aurora_borealis_2

Oh dear

Try GP, duty social worker and A&E in that order.

Kick a55!

Kelinik

Hiya, we've done doc, gave grandad temazepam and said there's nothing more he can do at the moment.

Social worker it is then, shall get my butt kicking boots on.

aurora_borealis_2

Does someone know how to deal with his insulin now?

Kelinik

I don't personally, but I shall see if Mum does, am waiting for her to ring back as she had just nipped home for a shower/clean clothes (neighbour is sitting with Nan) when I called just now.

aurora_borealis_2

Did you mention the insulin to the doc?
Does someone know how to do his blood sugars?

Kelinik

Oh I see what you mean, yes everyone that has been out has checked his blood count, blood pressure etc etc, all has been consistently normal. Nan also does all that herself twice a day, we can't see a physical reason for this, he's not on any new pills as that can upset him.