Brother borrowed 20k without consent

AndyBSG wrote: »

They do say what goes around, comes around and maybe your brothers new relationship status is a sign that something has finally caught up with him.

Out of interest, did you have any contact with your brothers wife during this? Maybe her conscience finally caught up with her or she found out the full details of your brothers actions and that could have been responsible for their split?

Also, how close were you to your brother's children? I understand they were at the funeral but you didn't communicate with them but maybe now is a time to consider if you can salvage some form of relationship with them as they aren't really responsible for the sins of their father?

Just to clarify the points you raised AndyBSG my brothers wife had suddenly & tragically passed away shortly before my father discovered my brothers deception. The illicit bank transfers had already taken place before she died and the later realisation that she too was highly likely to have known (& possibly even been party to) what my brother had done caused my father immense pain.


Unfortunately it transpired the grief of my sister-in-laws untimely death had not only partially enabled my brother to continue his deception undetected longer but after his actions were disclosed to family members, for those not aware of the full extent & what my brother had done to dad or that he had done it before his wife died, it enabled people to just assume it was grief that caused my brothers behaviour. However only the viewing of evidence clarified this was not the case so most people remained blissfully unaware of the facts which was again hard for dad.


With regard to my brothers three children (who are adults aged 24 to 30) my father wrote by hand to each of them several times pleading for them to just get in touch & he sent them birthday & Christmas cards as usual but they ignored his letters & sent him no cards which devastated him. Dad had been a very close loving granddad to them & despite of what had happened they could have continued some sort of relationship with him had they wished.


Sadly everything was stacked against dad, that old adage 'hindsight' rears its head at every turn, it took dad time to unravel everything & consider what steps he should or could take & time ran out for him before he could find any closure. He was a good honest man who loved and trusted his family - he did not deserve to end his days heartbroken & in such utter despair xxx