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My Partner has left me
Foofur
Posts: 11 Forumite
Hi All,
My partner has just up and left me with 3 young children (6,5,1) and cleared out the joint account. He has left me with no money, and all the bills are due to come out in the next week or so, including a mortgage and a secured loan. I have no idea what to do from here. The washing machine is bust too (just to top it off!) and the kids need uniform and shoes for school (which we had planned on buying this weekend!)
I know its the bank holiday weekend, so I know I cant get any official advice before Tuesday, but can someone please give me any guidance as to what I need to be doing. I have no family in this country (I'm Irish), and my passport is out of date so hopping back home is not an option for the near future
I should add that the online banking has been suspended at his request and Halifax wont talk to me because I failed the security question (I got the branch wrong, I named the local branch instead of the one we opened the account in, in London grrrR), so I have no bank account now, and no way of getting in to see what direct debits are due out and he has taken the paperwork file with him (no idea why!)
I'm at rock bottom at the moment so any practical advice will help.
My partner has just up and left me with 3 young children (6,5,1) and cleared out the joint account. He has left me with no money, and all the bills are due to come out in the next week or so, including a mortgage and a secured loan. I have no idea what to do from here. The washing machine is bust too (just to top it off!) and the kids need uniform and shoes for school (which we had planned on buying this weekend!)
I know its the bank holiday weekend, so I know I cant get any official advice before Tuesday, but can someone please give me any guidance as to what I need to be doing. I have no family in this country (I'm Irish), and my passport is out of date so hopping back home is not an option for the near future
I should add that the online banking has been suspended at his request and Halifax wont talk to me because I failed the security question (I got the branch wrong, I named the local branch instead of the one we opened the account in, in London grrrR), so I have no bank account now, and no way of getting in to see what direct debits are due out and he has taken the paperwork file with him (no idea why!)
I'm at rock bottom at the moment so any practical advice will help.
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Comments
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So sorry to hear you've been left in a totally miserable situation. Hang in there - you'll get some sound advice from the very knowing people here. My only advice is that there is nothing practically you can do until Tuesday but then perhaps get to the CAB as soon as possible. also, come Tuesday try and contact as many creditors as possible (mortgage, loan etc) and explain the situation. If they know the circumstances they may try to help. If they don't know - they cant help.
Big hug!0 -
Foofur do you have any soruce of income yourself Ie wages, tax credits, child benefit. If so first thing Tuesday you need to go and open a bank account in your own name and get it all paid in there instead of into the joint account dont let him have anymore of your money. Then go see the Cab as the previous poster has advised.
On less helpfull note what a complete A**e hole for leaving his kids in such a situation men like him should have his nether regions cut off so they cant have anymore children.
Hugs to you and i hope you get it all sorted out :-) x:jFriends are like fabric you can never have enough:j0 -
I'm so sorry that this has happened to you and to your children. It must be such a scary time for you all. I can't offer any advice but wanted to wish you luck, and strength, and I'm sure someone will be along this morning with some good advice.0
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Don't halifax open on a saturday?
Can you pop in today and see them?0 -
sorry to hear ur news - well done for keeping your head and asking for help...
go to the bank today - get as much sorted as you can...
Good luck x0 -
xmaslolly76 wrote: »On less helpfull note what a complete A**e hole for leaving his kids in such a situation men like him should have his nether regions cut off so they cant have anymore children.
Can we not turn this into a man hating thread? We have no idea why he left in such circumstances.
Such comments are less than helpful.0 -
Lol vik...what happened to 'Be who you are and say what you feel.......?'
:rotfl:
OP you must be in a state of shock at the moment, and panicking a bit over the circumstances you've been left in. You're probably going to have some tough times ahead of you but you WILL get through them.
I dont think there's much you can do practically at the moment, not a lot of point in going to the bank today if your OH has cleaned the account out, although it would be beneficial for you to open a new account in your sole name as soon as possible. CAB first thing on Tuesday as the others have said.Herman - MP for all!
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Thanks for your help so far, I'm not going to go into the emotions of it, as I have plenty of emotional support with me (thank God!), its the practicalities that I really need help with.
I have rang the gas and electric and they were very sympathetic so they are going to give me a payment card with reduced payments for the moment, although I'm hoping I'll be able to get cash off my family to make the complete payments.
I cant go into the bank itself, because as I said he took all the paperwork, including any bills I could have used as ID. The folder also has my birth cert in it, although in his defence he probably didnt know that. He also has the bank card.
The mortgage people are not available until Tuesday so I cant do anything with that now, although the gentleman did put a note on my account to say I had rang.
We have a secured loan with Ocean finance (yes I know, wrong thing to do, but we didnt realise that at the time), and that is already 2 months in arrears so I dont think they are going to be quite so accomodating.
Council offices are not open until Tuesday for council tax.
The phone and internet are totally in his name, as is sky so I wont be able to do anything with those. Although I'm not fussed with Sky, the phone is a lifeline at the moment, especially with my family in Ireland.
Anything else I can do before Tuesday?
Thanks a million for any help, I appreciate it0 -
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