I need a bit of help; I'm completely stuck

lostandworried · 28 June 2011 at 3:21PM

I'm a nineteen year old student, living away from home during term time. I am disabled with dyspraxia, depression, anxiety, and gynaecological problems. My mum is on highest care DLA. She is also a full time carer to my sister who is also on highest care. My mum doesn't work and relies solely on benefits. My dad left us when I was five and does not support us money wise.

I have been living in halls for two years due to my disabilities but next year I have signed up to live in my friend's flat. It has become apparent I can't afford it, nor can I afford halls - unless I go without food. I can't stay at home as we share a bedroom, my sister and I, and there's no space/peace to do studying, and I can't afford to travel in and out every day. I also need my independence and my GP who's based where I live term time.

I do not know what to do. I have tried saving up, I saved up my EMA from school but that is rapidly dissapearing. I have some money but it will not last long. I have the first rent payment of £460 coming off in August. I also have to pay my way towards a phone and broadband line, and a TV licence. I'll also need some kind of food. I can't move in until AUgust but thought I should best be sorting this out now.

I thought I might apply to DLA on the grounds of my health problems but I got a little mini questionairre with my form - and it says I am unlikey to get help because I don't need 24/7 care, I'm not on dialysis or deaf or blind. I don't know what to do. There are no other benefits I can get seemingly. My mum can't help, my dad wont and my grandparents can't. One gives me an amount of money each year but it always dissapears on textbooks and stationary and essentials. She is also now 81 and that money isnt guaranteed anymore.

I have tried, tried and tried to get work but I live in a very rural village - there are very few jobs in my village except ones that my dyspraxia prevents me from doing. All the hotels have all my number to contact me about jobs. I have put up babysitting adverts but noone's taken me on. I've looked on the jobcentre website and s1 jobs and there's nothing. If I work away from my village, I make no money as I have to get the bus and all my wages would go on bus fairs. I'm also, due to bus services and lack of them, very restricted as to where I can work. I'm really unsure what to do?

My Uni have a discretionary fund but they can't pay for living costs - what do I do? If anyone has any advice about DLA or anything, even a benefit I haven't heard of can you help?

Thanks in advance for any help.

dodger1 · 28 June 2011 at 4:44PM

I have no idea about DLA etc but surely you are entitled to the maintenance loan of £4,950 outside London or £6,928 in London. If you're not in London I'd find somewhere cheaper to rent. What about student grants and bursaries. You need to speak to your student union rep, they are pretty helpful with this kind of thing. This is a link explaining all about it

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/EducationAndLearning/UniversityAndHigherEducation/StudentFinance/Applyingforthefirsttime/index.htm

stentipede · 28 June 2011 at 5:07PM

You can claim DLA if your troubles, what ever they may be, mean you need either frequent attention or constant supervision. Have you seen a GP about your issues? S/he then can certify that you have them and how they affect you. (But often they won't give you this as DLA send them an enquiry form, and they get paid for completing it). Or any other specialist ditto.
You have to have a NEED for help. You DON'T have to either get help, accept help or ask for any, (but it helps if you do). If you have friends who are willing to say how your troubles affect you, get them to write it down for you. They need to concentrate on how it affects your ability to self care or how you can end up it a jam because of it:
Dispraxia falls causing injury, depression causing you to miss lectures, meals, getting up, blood loss from the gyni thing causing dizzyness and falls, that sort of thing. Depression is vile, and the resulting lethargy can affect "all activities of daily life", so demonstrate how it is for you, the more actual examples of disaster, the better... (for your claim if not for yourself).

Your uni should have a counsellor for disabled students, they should advise further. DO NOT attempt to complete the form without benefit educated help if at all possible. Your Citizen Advice Bureau, Welfare Right organisation (Google your home and "Welfare Rights") etc may be able to help you further.
Ask your Social Services for a "Care Needs Assessment", which you can then use as evidence in your DLA claim.
Also "The Pension Service" visit younger people to help with DLA application forms. (This is quite new and you may need to insist a bit if turned away...)

And of course the usual student loans etc can help.
Google +Charities +Students and you may find specialist student charities, but your Uni should know about these.

Good luck in persevering, don't let your situation grind you down.

Aginoth · 28 June 2011 at 5:11PM

You could try getting Disabled Students Allowance.

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/DisabledPeople/EducationAndTraining/HigherEducation/DG_070188

computersaysnoagain · 28 June 2011 at 5:16PM

I also say try for dla if you need help with care and support and a visit to welfare rights/cab would would be a great help for you in filling in the forms. Also let your doctor know how you are struggling and its effect on your illness. Welfare rights are angels in help with these monsters of a form and take the stress of doing so away.

Sad to hear one so young struggling but glad to know you found the forum, as other poster said you keep your chin up, you will get there

lostandworried · 28 June 2011 at 7:02PM

I'm not really supposed to work unless I'm on holiday - my GP thinks it will be too much during term time. I've already explained why I can't work in the summer, I have really really really tried and I'm not getting anywhere sadly. I don't want to get in debt if I can help it, I've seen my mum and dad in debt and it does nothing to help. I'm in debt as it is from my student loan - and I really, really want to learn to drive after I leave uni so I can help my mum a bit, so being in debt wont help.

I already get students disability allowance, which helped me buy a printer and scanner :j which does help a lot. I get the maximum loan, and a bursary, which are both fantastic and make a huge difference - if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be at university at all as they're the only way I can pay rent. But they only cover rent, and next year as I said, they wont cover my rent at all.

But I will definitely go for the DLA thing and do my best with the form, see how it goes. Going to phone the GP tommorow for an appt, I only spoke to her last night so a bit unsure of whether to contact again, will do it though I think.

My mum has got to go to the CSA soon as well, so think I will mention this when I go with her

Thanks so much for all the lovely advice, glad I posted here as I wasn't sure where else to ask!

babymoo · 28 June 2011 at 7:26PM

Did you not read the OP? This student actually has a decent head on her shoulders by wanting to stay out of debt and has already explained why she currently doesnt have a job!!

Do you have care needs that you can claim DLA for? If so then maybe that can pay for a holiday to Barbados for you, same as DLA can help someone pay for driving lessons. DLA is exactly as it is called Disability Living Allowance. What you spend DLA on is entirely the person in receipt of it's prerogative. I am in receipt of DLA and it helped me to learn how to drive, if I didn't drive I would have absolutely no independance what so ever.

OP, I would go to your local job centre and ask for a DLA form and make an appointment at your local CAB or Welfare Rights office to help you to fill it out. Speak to your GP and any other consultants at hospitals you have and ask them to write you a letter explaining the care needs you have as it will back up your claim.

Check what your entitled to by clickin on benefit entitlement and putting your details into there. If you are living in a spare room at a friends and have a tenancy with them can you claim housing benefit?

I know nothing about CSA and how that works so unsure if they will make your father pay anything towards your upkeep now your 19 but im guessing not, I could be wrong however.

Have you also looked at ESA? Again I am not sure if you can claim this while being a full time student? How about JSA, if you are seeking work this might be more appropriate but again not sure how it works with being a student.

Good luck x

ETA: can I also suggest you repost this on http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/forumdisplay.php?f=155 as this deals with disabilities a bit more. You may get a few more answers from people over there.

System · 28 June 2011 at 7:36PM

You can only claim ESA as a full time student if you are in receipt of DLA

lostandworried · 28 June 2011 at 8:17PM

Well - dyspraxia wise, I have over sensory issues. I struggle shopping in supermarkets and rely on online shopping. I can't balance well and struggle to walk on uneven ground, uphill, at night and in areas of poor visibility, on snow and on ice. I can't cook very well without cutting or burning myself, and have trouble gaging the temperature of things so I quite often eat things that are too hot or too cold. I also have difficulty paying attention to things and have am likely to burn what I do cook. I struggle with hygiene - I can't brush my teeth well, brush my hair well, straighten or blow dry it very well. I forget my medication and struggle to take liquid medication. I have trouble bathing without soaking the floor because can't aim water to my head. I have major trouble sleeping - I can either sleep for hours and hours on end, or can't sleep at all. Also need a heavy duvet, a certain room temperature and can't cope with noise/complete darkness very well, rely on a nightlight. I struggle to use both hands at once, I struggle to follow instructions. I forget things a lot - day to day I have a rubbish memory but have a weirdly good long term memory. I get sore muscles, I have floppy muscles, I fall a lot and due to my joints/muscles I am more liable to serious injuries - I broke my leg simply by tripping up. I am oversensitive to pain as well, but am not good at treating injuries. I struggle to use small things, like buttons, zips, and buckles. I have difficulty using most kitchen equipment and utensils and need adapted things like special cultery and rubber mats to stop my plate from sliding. I struggle using stairs, being at a height etc.I need someone with me most of the time. I can't, for instance, stay in a house completely on my own. I cut myself when I shave myself a lot. Forget I have left water running, or the cooker on, or the straightners on.. Drop hot water on myself if I make tea, drop glasses, cutlery etc. Need a handrail on the stairs, non slip mats everywhere, handle bars in the bath so I don't fall. If I try to exercise, I am good at injuring myself.

Depression - I have it to the extent I can sit and do nothing on my worst day. I have very little self esteem or confidence and feel very down a lot. I self harm on the worst days and have burnt my arm with my straightners. I need motivation to get up in the morning, and the same to go to bed.

Anxiety - I struggle to leave my house on the worst days. I have irrational fears of most things, I struggle day to day with most tasks and have intrusive thoughts and irrational worries. I rely on people for constant reassurance and often feel physically ill due to the way my mind is. I'm on medication to dampen things down and see a consultant pyschiatrist every two weeks. I need someone with me most of the time - I cling onto people when I'm out. I'm not good at taking medication when I need it, as I worry about doing so. Not good at touching chemicals or unfamiliar things and surfaces, and not good at all at going to new or unfamiliar places. If I have the choice, I'll stay in all day every day.

Gynae - I have very heavy periods, bad PMT, vulvar cysts (that the NHS won't operate on), and hypertrophic labia that cause me extreme pain when walking. I have to hunt down underwear that won't cause me pain (often with an excess cost) and have to be near a toilet at most times due to a need to "sort myself". I develop blisters and cuts due to irritation. I also have difficulty using the toilet due to muscle issues and tension due to anxiety, this means I have continence issues and again need to be near a toilet a lot. I also suffer IBS and can be in a lot of pain after eating with this. I'm on creams and special shower gel. I'm intolerant to all hormonal contraceptives and medicines so have to put up with period problems. I've also got possible PCOS, recurring UTI's due to hygiene issues (not that I'm dirty, I just like don't "clean myself" correctly because I can't manage. I am clean, just get bacteria where it shouldn't be). If any of that's TMI, sorry, but I don't know you guys so thought I should be honest.

I do see specialists a lot - I'm in the GP every 3-4 weeks, the pyschiatrist every 4 weeks, the gynaecologist every 4 weeks.. I'm forever missing Uni due to home problems too. It's a nightmare if I'm honest. I don't agree with people frauding benefits any more than you guys do, but I just thought it might be worth a try to see if there's anything can be done at all - otherwise I'll most likely end up dropping out of uni. I can work as an adult, just not while I'm doing a full time uni course and supporting my mum/sister!

Credit-Crunched · 28 June 2011 at 8:21PM

babymoo wrote: »

Taking a loan is a great idea if they can get it and learning to budget is another great idea but seeing as this person saved up all their EMA through either college or A-levels then i'd say they are not just expecting other people to pay for their education.

And where does EMA come from, taxc payers, student loans are not dependent on financial situations etc so your argument about qualifying status is null and void

All i am saying is that if this person wants to study then it needs to be paid for, everyone else has to take a loan so why not the OP. I am not attacking her want to succeed her education which I commend, I just feel that this needs to be paid for some how and a student loan would be the ideal solution for her

dodger1 · 28 June 2011 at 8:23PM

lostandworried wrote: »

I'm not really supposed to work unless I'm on holiday - my GP thinks it will be too much during term time. I've already explained why I can't work in the summer, I have really really really tried and I'm not getting anywhere sadly. I don't want to get in debt if I can help it, I've seen my mum and dad in debt and it does nothing to help. I'm in debt as it is from my student loan - and I really, really want to learn to drive after I leave uni so I can help my mum a bit, so being in debt wont help.

I already get students disability allowance, which helped me buy a printer and scanner :j which does help a lot. I get the maximum loan, and a bursary, which are both fantastic and make a huge difference - if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be at university at all as they're the only way I can pay rent. But they only cover rent, and next year as I said, they wont cover my rent at all.

But I will definitely go for the DLA thing and do my best with the form, see how it goes. Going to phone the GP tommorow for an appt, I only spoke to her last night so a bit unsure of whether to contact again, will do it though I think.

My mum has got to go to the CSA soon as well, so think I will mention this when I go with her

Thanks so much for all the lovely advice, glad I posted here as I wasn't sure where else to ask!

If you're getting your student loan, bursary and maintenance grant you should be able to pay the rent. My daughter lived in halls the first year and shared a flat the final two years on the loan, bursary and grant. As far as debt is concerned that's life I'm afraid for students without well off parents. I take it you do realise the student debt isn't payable until you earn £15,000.

I need a bit of help; I'm completely stuck

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