Friend wants me to be Guarantor but I have concerns

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  • Energize
    Energize Posts: 509 Forumite
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    redpete wrote: »
    He's either too dim to realise that this is rubbish or is hoping you re too dim to realise that this is rubbish.

    Yeah, the success rate does not drop like that over the course of a few months.
  • onwards&upwards
    onwards&upwards Posts: 3,423 Forumite
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    From the NHS website:

    It's estimated that the success rate of a vasectomy reversal is:

    75% if you have your vasectomy reversed within 3 years
    up to 55% after 3 to 8 years
    between 40% and 45% after 9 to 14 years
    30% after 15 to 19 years
    less than 10% after 20 years

    So if he reckons he’s got a 75% chance then within the last three years he was absolutely certain he didn’t want any more kids.

    This is all sounding a bit ridiculous, what’s really going on here!
  • JayRitchie
    JayRitchie Posts: 526 Forumite
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    onwards&upwards wrote: »


    This is all sounding a bit ridiculous, what’s really going on here!

    My thoughts too. The friend is sounding a little , err, backwards, or someone really pulling a con trick.
  • AnotherJoe
    AnotherJoe Posts: 19,622 Forumite
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    edited 14 September 2019 at 12:01PM
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    rh205 wrote: »
    Just a quick update. I met up with him on Saturday and he said that his father in law had said he would be the guarantor. It turns out his girlfriend doesn't know about his procedure and he's having done now because the success rate will be less than 50% in a few months time whereas at the moment it's at 75%.

    Yeh, right of course it will. Not.

    It cannot possibly drop off a cliff like that.

    However today he has asked me again as his father in law was rejected on the grounds of being semi retired.
    I call B/S. Its about income not retirement.

    His operation is tomorrow. Whilst I'm sticking to my guns I find it crazy how he has gone and booked it without getting his finances sorted first. But maybe it's just that I've been brought up to only buy what I can afford.

    Now it just smells like a straight out con to me, because this is all pure b/s.

    Either that or he's a grade A moron who cant understand that 75% within 3 years falling to 55% 3-8 years doesn't mean 75% 3 years and 55% after 3 years and a day.

    And irrespective all that, recall all the previous reasons why not to lend this hapless chancer any money and stick to your decision.
  • Terry_Towelling
    Terry_Towelling Posts: 2,279 Forumite
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    Remember, people, threads that contain a lot of guff about important context where the context is actually irrelevant are usually BS. This one was obvious right from the start.

    So many bogus threads also contain a medical/emotional complication to try and incite righteous indignation in us. Yes, it's fun but always remember it is BS.
  • AnotherJoe
    AnotherJoe Posts: 19,622 Forumite
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    Its certainly looking that way TT, if OP met vasectomy-guy "Saturday" why say that and not "today" and if and the op is "tomorrow" that means it will be on a Sunday.
    Reckon I've been taken Hook Line and Sinker, I'm out.
  • Terry_Towelling
    Terry_Towelling Posts: 2,279 Forumite
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    Actually, AnotherJoe, I think OP was reasonably careful with their time line. They posted to say they'd been asked again on 11th and stated that the operation was scheduled for 'tomorrow' (12th) which was Thursday just gone.

    Something else a little unbelievable was the fact that the friend hasn't spoken to his own parents about it but had asked the father of his ex-wife to be guarantor. Would you really approach the father of the woman you are now divorced from and ask them to help you in your quest to impregnate another woman? On the subject of the FIL being turned down due to being semi-retired, what does that actually mean? Presumably it just means 'working part time'.

    Having now stuck my neck out, I'm fully expecting OP to 'up the ante' by coming back to say the friend is widowed rather than divorced. If they do, then why was that not mentioned in the OP along with all of the other 'important' contextual information?
  • Clive_Woody
    Clive_Woody Posts: 5,855 Forumite
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    Terence_Burrows wrote: »
    Your issues with it answer your own question, don't do it.
    I can only assume that you are digging up lots of old threads to increase your post count before the spamming starts.
    "We act as though comfort and luxury are the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about” – Albert Einstein
  • Man_From_Bath
    Man_From_Bath Posts: 46 Forumite
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    i can't believe the opening post, this has to be a wind up....
  • Ben8282
    Ben8282 Posts: 4,821 Forumite
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    edited 8 October 2019 at 4:54PM
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    The first thing that struck me as odd here is that this finance agreement, for which you say he has already paid a deposit, being offered by the private hospital requires a guarantor. Guarantor loans are not common and are offered at high APR's by the likes of Amigo. It strikes me as very strange that finance agreements requiring guarantors should be being offered for medical purposes.

    Why the rush to have this procedure carried out? OK they think they want a baby together but why the rush exactly? I have read about his claim that the likelihood of the procedure being successful will drop, but still. Why not wait until they are actually living together in the UK and both in stable long term employment before having more children? This has not been thought through properly. This could of course be some sort of scam on her part as she may (rightly or wrongly) believe that if she were to become preganat it would assist her visa application / get her supported by him in the Philippines for the rest of her life or some similar scam.

    Have nothing to do with this at all. Your friend should be giving some thought to the high costs involved of bringing her to the UK in the first place and the additional expense supporting her, not this surgical procedure. His priorities are completely wrong.
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