Falling out of love with my wife
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For those who say they feel for the OP, I wanted to say I feel more for his wife.
If the attitude and lack of respect in his posts are anything like how he talks to her in real life I'm not surprised she gets fed up with him.All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.
Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.0 -
Marriage is an equal partnership.
I disagree. One may be stronger; one may love a little more; one may be smarter, one may be richer.
And that may also vary over time. I am the leaner and the support at vaious times. And that's ok. Status is not static.
No relationship is 100% equal; the important thing is that people are ok with the balance they have.2021 GC £1365.71/ £24000 -
BrassicWoman wrote: »I disagree. One may be stronger; one may love a little more; one may be smarter, one may be richer.
And that may also vary over time. I am the leaner and the support at vaious times. And that's ok. Status is not static.
No relationship is 100% equal; the important thing is that people are ok with the balance they have.
No sure where you got 100% equal with equal partnership?
Equal partnership doesn’t mean each doing the same; just each doing for the other0 -
As I'm older I find it very hard to understand why people don't communicate anymore..
They are happy putting their problems on an Internet forum but what would you have done if internet wasn't around (as in my younger days)
Just speak to your partner, make time as well..no excuse as many eons ago I worked full time with 2 children under 5. I was even at my desk 24 hours after having my second child in early 80's
Whether it works out or not communication is the only way to find out0 -
I feel for both of you because it seems that neither of you have matured sufficiently yet to realise that marriage changes over time and neither of you have yet matured enough to learn that the more both of yiu try and contribute more than 50% to this relatiionship, the less will find yourself arguing about things.
I get the impression both of you thought the lovey Covey carefree romantic attitude you had when you were courting wouldlast indefinitely. Virtually every marriage has to renegotiate itself when children arrive and I suspect instead you've both retreated to your separate corners of the boxing ring and are just waiting for the bell to ring for the next round.
Sit down over a quiet relaxed dinner and a glass or wine and TALK TO EACH OTHER ! Marriage can be hard work at times because we're all human. A little more goodwill to each other on both your parts could change the atmosphere enormously. .0 -
I dont think its anything to do with nails etc I think she feels unappreciated and since having baby shes just lost her mojo. When you become a mum you can lose yourself a bit. Your body changes, you're not the exciting woman your husband fell in love with because you're so damn tired. Yes 2 people have babies but its really the woman who's life changes the most.
You say you want to end her conversations quickly, my husband does that to me and its horrible. Its completely knocked my confidence and self esteem. I dont think hes being horrible but men are less inclined to listen to the boring !!!!! their partners talk about sometimes where women pretend to be interested (sorry men but we do).
I think you should show her you appreciate her and you'll see the woman you fell in love with come back0 -
Does she have any friends that she sees socially in the evenings or when she has time at home away from work. What about the family - hers or yours - can they babysit so you can go to the cinema or pop out for a pizza.
She might be lonely and you may not have even noticed.0 -
@TBagpuSS @andydownes123 @Izadora
All of you are right to some extent. Yes, there are things I can do that don't cost anything but it's not like I am being treated like a prince in return. Yes, since the child a lot of our needs have probably become more basic like having a tidy house etc., but I still bust my bank balance to buy her fancy shoes, dresses whilst I am getting wearing shoes to work that need replacing and have one pair to go out with. All of that is my choice but it's so frustrating to have that all thrown back in my face because I don't treat her good anymore.
And what confuses me is when she mentions that and I ask how?, she mentions the superficial things like the dining out and gifts. I then bring up the fact we have a child, the fact we have childcare cost and the fact that, despite all of that, I manage to get her gifts and have never had a problem looking after the child by myself so she can go out. After that is mentioned, that's when she brings up the house being tidy etc. and why that annoys the hell out of me is because she is actually the messiest person in the house. I leave plates out, she always leave plates out with food in them. I might not tidy up the child toys every evening, the carpet is always full of her hair. So I know if I bought her shoes every week she would be happy, but when I mention I can't do that, she switches her grievances to things like the tidying up and not letting her speak.
And the reason I have this bad habit of hurrying her up is because she talks for so long. I remember one time she misheard me and I tried to stop and correct her only to be shut down. I thought I would let it go and correct her when finished. She was talking and repeating herself for 48 minutes (yes I timed it), going back and forth on the same point all the time. She is also constantly accusing me of stuff and this all becomes very tiresome and has sucked away all patience I had for her.0 -
Forget falling out of love with your wife, it sounds like you can’t stand her.0
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