Reformed shopaholic? please can you give me the benefit of your advice

NGlady wrote: »

Probably the wrong thread to put this on lol.
But ive got £10 in my purse. Im taking all my debit cards away from me. And that is all Im allowed to spend until Saturday morning now. On saturday morning ill allow myself £20 until Tuesday wonder if ill manage it lol.

I need to that. Make me think more before I spend.

Good luck. Post back with the details: what did and didn't you buy?

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alec_eiffel wrote: »

Hi,

I doubt this will be of any use to you really but I heard these words " 'no' is a possible answer". The guy was talking about immaturity and how being an adult meant you said no to yourself sometimes and if that meant dealing with your real problems rather than avoiding them through spending then so be it.

That hit me so hard I couldn't not change. It's simple, but it's not easy.

Hi all, a very interesting thread. I used to have an addiction to something else and after deciding to say 'no' to it, the addictive element morphed into the shopping bug.

So this is my story -
1. buying gadgets in the post - most of them completely unsuitable for my house.
2. correspondence courses - I got such a thrill of looking through the catalogues but whenever I started on the course all the excitement left and I usually had to force myself to to it.
3. Hobby magazines, cookery, women's mags - at one point I was spending about £50 a week on them if not more!!
4. Crafts stash - Sometimes my house resembles Hobbycraft.
5. self-help books
6. helping out with charities - I didn't just help one out - it soon got over 10 - on committees etc and I was overwhelmed. So instead of spending money I was giving them all my time

I recognised that in the magazines and books, most of them are written in such a way to make you feel like part of a special community, I'm sure that's why I got so addicted to buying them. And you feel that if you buy that next special thing, all your problems will go away.

I'm also very attracted to packaging, clothing etc in certain colours and often buy unwanted items just because of the colours!

Nowadays I often have NSD's however, without buying anything when I'm out, I have to go to the library and search frantically for that special type of book that will get rid of the cravings for my shopping 'fix'. And if I don't find one that I get really stressed and go home to sit on the computer for the rest of the day so none of my chores get done .

There is another addiction I've had simulataneously with the shopping one and I've finally got that one sorted ( I think) only by realising that it doesn't help at all in solving any problems.

I think that the post I've quoted about being an adult and saying no to yourself is very good advice, so I'm going to reflect on it as most of my life seems to be very black and white - either not doing or doing to excess.

Good Luck everyone!

you can always take it back....:j
I love shopping too... so much that i am in debt now... i am trying to get myself sorted before April..... I have found that my "hobby" can make me some money too.... i buy things that i know will sell well.. i enjoy picking them, paying for them then selling them... it makes my silly mind believe i am owing them. I must say yes, sometimes i want to keep them all.. that;s the reason why i list them on Ebay as soon as i get back home or at night time when i put my DD to bed. I am 25 yrs old and i am really paying off my debts fast doing this.. i was 1300 in one credit card and 400 in the other they are now they are 600 and the other 350, all of this started in January.. I know i can do this, and hopefully i learnt my lesson and after April all the money is in my pocket and i can have some amazing hols... :rotfl: Thanks so much for all the advice...

Great thread!

When I first started on here I tried to identify my weak areas and times. A tendency to splurge when feeling down or bored. Clothes, toiletries, books and magazines were all areas I needed help with.

I then joined various challenges to try and overcome these tendencies. I started by not buying magazines with the 100 day challenge. Then moved onto tolietries for 100 days and then clothes. Once I'd made it through the 100 days I found that I was a now felt a bit reticent about spending money on these things. I have more clothes than I wear anyway! Instead of shopping I started to go through my things, decluttered and assessed how much I was actually using. This took a very long time and made me feel a bit sick about the amount of money wasted. Now when I'm in the shops I focus on what I already have and try and decide if I really need an item when I have so much at home!

I also try and distract myself when I get the urge to splurge and avoid any shops for a bit!!

I am now at the stage where I've joined the spend £100 on clothes in a year challenge and am buying essentials only for at least the next few months.

I am determined to break the debt cycle once and for all. I want to be debt free to buy a house with OH and then stay that way!

Not sure if my burblings will be of help to anyone but it feels good to have got this far. Now I just need to keep fighting the urges!!