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selling with adult children who refuse to leave

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  • samanthaxxx
    samanthaxxx Posts: 51 Forumite
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    I agree she has been much to soft on them helping them out all the time and agree she should move in the bungalow herself with the 16 year old. I know it is not my direct problem but it upsets me to see her with this problem of 2 grown up children who are so selfish and have no clue of what it is to have to pay bills food etc one who won't even speak to her after all she has done for them.
  • brixham
    brixham Posts: 208 Forumite
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    When I was in my early 20's my parents sold the family home and downsized I was living with them at the time.
    I can remember having to sign some sort of legal document stating I had no claim on the house and would move out at the same time as my parents.
    Does this imply the lazy gits do have some rights ?
    Feel for your MIL but also feel she needs to get tough with them.
  • carefullycautious
    carefullycautious Posts: 2,463 Forumite
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    :mad: I would print out this thread and show them up for what they are. THe problem is that their behaviour will become worse as this lady ages. SHe will be exploited and vulnerable to their demands. Thank god at least one of her sons can see this
  • dopester
    dopester Posts: 4,890 Forumite
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    samanthaxxx wrote: »
    My husbands mother lives in west sussex and has a big house in which she wants to sell and buy a small bungalow. At the moment she lives there with her 30 year old daughter and two sons one being 26 the other 16 with special needs. She is in the process of selling it and wants to buy a bungalow which she would like to rent out and her and 16 year old son would move in with a friend.
    She has an interest only mortgage with no way of paying the capital in about 5 years as she is a pensioner but if she sells now she will have enough profit to buy a bungalow out right.

    How big is this bungalow going to be? Where is the mother going to live after selling the West Sussex big house which still has a mortgage on it?

    She wants to sell her main home to downsize and clear debt. Then buy a bungalow (to rent out?) and her 16 year old son and friend would move in where?

    Confused.. realise this doesn't answer anything to do with the adult children... but the main plans are confusing me.
  • Fire_Fox
    Fire_Fox Posts: 26,026 Forumite
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    samanthaxxx wrote: »
    I agree she has been much to soft on them helping them out all the time and agree she should move in the bungalow herself with the 16 year old. I know it is not my direct problem but it upsets me to see her with this problem of 2 grown up children who are so selfish and have no clue of what it is to have to pay bills food etc one who won't even speak to her after all she has done for them.

    Are their names Kevin and Perry? :p
    Declutterbug-in-progress.⭐️⭐️⭐️ ⭐️⭐️
  • silvercar
    silvercar Posts: 47,218 Ambassador
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    A pensioner living in rented accommodation is not going to find it easy to get a BTL mortgage.
    I'm a Forum Ambassador on The Coronavirus Boards as well as the housing, mortgages and student money saving boards. I volunteer to help get your forum questions answered and keep the forum running smoothly. Forum Ambassadors are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com (it's not part of my role to deal with this). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.
  • samanthaxxx
    samanthaxxx Posts: 51 Forumite
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    My husband is starting to hate his brother and sister for how they are treating his mum. We live in Hertfordshire and she often is on the phone to him upset at the situation. They do nothing to help in the house but the daughter has a bad habit of moving furniture around to how she wants it as if she owns the house and mum-in-law gets upset about that too. I think they have gradually worn her down and taken over but she needs to get strong with them.
  • samanthaxxx
    samanthaxxx Posts: 51 Forumite
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    Silvercar she does not need a btl mortgage she will have enough equity from the sale of the house she is selling at present to buy bungalow outright.
  • googler
    googler Posts: 16,103 Forumite
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    Is your husband up to giving his brother and sister a firm, strong and forceful reality check?

    It really sounds as though his Mum is in need of a dominant, alpha male adult to lay down the law to her offspring.

    Failing this, assuming she has a solicitor hired for the sale, she could make an appointment for them with the sol so that he can outline their rights, or lack of same........ but then the trouble will be getting them to go.
  • roseland69
    roseland69 Posts: 113 Forumite
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    These children need a lesson in life. They've clearly been taking the P for way too long.

    She should sell up and move and sod them.

    How awful for this type of thing to go on within a family though. The kids sound like disrespectful, selfish no-hopers to me. Beggars belief really.
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