stopping work because childcare not working

Sarahsaver

I will elaborate on this tomorrow, if I need to, but in case there are any night owls you can begin to mull this over...
I work an 'average' of 35 hours a week, thus:
started a business in March
rep for a telecoms company (!)
work one day - 7 hours - a week for a charity (paid).

I have 3 children who attend an after school club, 2 have been there since easter, one since September. Youngest is not settled in and there is NO alternative, they are saying to me they cannot acommodate him. They have had a few problems with his behaviour. !!!!!! do i do? I cannot afford not to work, and I will not get JSA because I get a small pension(!)
I have no family around.
All my friends are in employment and thus cannot help with childcare.
There are no childminders in the area, and no other vacancies in afterschool clubs.
I feel like they are putting undue pressure on me because they know I am mainly self-employed, so maybe they think i can just drop everything. I cant help thinking they wouldnt take this stance if I worked full time for an employer rather than for myself.

I wouldnt be able to manage without the after school club.

For example I have to go to conferences/meetings that may not be over until after ds2 has finished school at 3pm. If I cannot go to such meetings I won't be able to do my charity job, and I cannot continue with my business if I cannot offer my services after 3pm - 2.30 if you count getting from another part of town to the school.

I dont even expect a magic solution - just wanted to go AAARHGH!

elaine373

There must be a registered child minder nearby , surely? Have you checked with your local social services??Or have you asked any of the other mus if they know of one?? word of mouth is a pretty good recommendation. What area are you from? Regards, Elaine

SnowyOwl_2

Hi Sarah

I haven't got the magic answer (though wish I did). Have you looked at https://www.netmums.com? They are nationwide and apparently geniuses at solving various child related issues.

Best of luck, I hope this gets sorted for you asap.

SnowyOwl

Glad

I've just put 'Leicester childminder' in Google and come up with over 100 in the area

or did you mean that none of these had vacancies?

Savvy_Sue

Sarah, I hear your AAARGH!

I don't know how old your youngest is, but if he's still Reception/Year 1, I would say from my experience of the other side of an afterschool club that very few children of that age can cope with a day at school followed by 2-3 hours at the club for 5 days a week. And I used to suggest to parents that they tried to avoid sending their children every day at that age if they could possibly avoid it. It is possible that if he was there less, his behaviour would change.

Is there any chance you could arrange for him to go home with a friend once a week, and / or finish early yourself 1 day a week?

Is the school having problems with his behaviour as well? If your son has behavioural problems, the club may need to be careful of the Disability Discrimination Act - a nursery, for example, can no longer refuse to take children who aren't toilet trained at 3 - but this is 'after my time' so don't quote me on that.

Your employment status should be no concern of theirs!

Glad

Is the new business that busy already Sarah? or could you maybe state your hours as 3 full and 3 half days a week? I'm sure you mentioned employing other staff in one thread, does that mean they could take some of the load off you?

Lillibet_2

Hi Sarah

Although your children may no longer be under a health visitor, could you contact them and ask if they have any suggestions? Mine is full of lists of other mums who are qualified childminders who want to look after just one child etc, plus they may be able to offer longer term assitance/advice re behavioral/settling in problems.

Don't know what else to suggest but hope you find a resolution soon.

Good luck;)

Counting_Pennies_2

Are you sure there aren't any mums who pick up their children who wouldn't mind having the one who can't stay in the after school club.

I am sure there will be one, if you ask in the playground who would do it for a nominal donation of a joint of meat, supermarket voucher, or a monthly pampering session in the local health centre. (I gather from my sister that unless you are a registered childminder there are a mass of legal implications if you accept cash, hence suggesting a gift of some sort to come to the cost of what childcare would be).

Savvy_Sue

Some more thoughts: if there are lots of working parents at the school, what are the rest of them doing for childcare?

Is it one particular member of staff who has problems with your son?

Have you been given a copy of their exclusion policy? And have they followed / are they following it?

At the end of the day, if your son's not happy then finding an alternative is a priority. But if it's just a settling in thing, and he's wound up a new / inexperienced worker, and he's worn out from starting school, then it may work out given time.

Sarahsaver

Glad wrote:

I've just put 'Leicester childminder' in Google and come up with over 100 in the area

or did you mean that none of these had vacancies?

I have checked. None near me. I do not drive either. I have to go to a conference at the weekend and this will totally mess things up if i cannot go. hotel and train tickets already booked:( Before any of you ask my weekend childcare is sorted because its someone who doesnt work at weekends, but they are unavailable to help out in the week as they work 9 to 5.
No I have not got clients all the time but setting up a business IS a full time job. I have a job on which I have to work solidly for 2 days Monday and Tuesday this week. If I am not working for clients I am networking, advertising, working on PR and training, and leafletting.
I can't advertise my services if they are not available after 3pm! It would be like me working for an employer, Imagine if I had a full time job but I said 'sorry I have to leave at 3'.

Prudent

Child care can be so stressfull!

After school care clubs do not always work for very young children. A long school day is enough and often they just need a home environment. It doesn't have to be your home though. As a teacher of young children I see this time and time again.

My daughter never really enjoyed after school care (I only used this as a last resort when I was desperate, as like you I needed to earn). She was however quite content to go to a childminder who only had a few children and did lots of the things I would have wanted to do with her after school. some child minders will collect and return children and as you have three this might be worthwhile. I was lucky and had fabulous child minders who did good things like art and craft, baking and swimming with my daughter. I would have rather have done these things with her myself but circumstances didn't allow.

There is new legistation which requires local authority provision to take children with all kinds of additional support needs including behavioral needs.

I am sorry I haven't offered you anything concrete to take forward but do empathise with your situation.