Hyper,naughty 6 year old boy,HELP

Carmina_Piranha_3

Jollygiantswife wrote: »

The staff at the hospital said that his "naughtiness" might just have been him not hearing (not, not listening!).

that's a point! i've got poor hearing and it gets worse at times and i get REALLY snappy and grumpy.

i don't know if children aged 6 can see the health visitor? or are they supposed to be transferred over to the school nurse when they start school? i'm so forgetful - i remember my boy having a hearing test with the school nurse when he was in his SATS year so he would have been 6 at the time.

she told me his hearing was okay but he wasn't paying attention. i've been told the same thing about my youngest, i must have incredibly ignorant children :rotfl: with both of my children whenever they go for a hearing test after a few minutes i am asked if they have ADHD - they really don't but they have no attention span.

if you think he might have ADHD you might want to borrow the Chris Greene book from a library. he's the bloke who wrote 'toddler taming'. i read it when my son was being assessed for ADHD during year 1 at school. even though we didn't think he had ADHD we found the book very helpful, it explained star charts etc.

crockpot

He is on Omega 3 and has had his ears and eyes tested he is fine.

He has just started speach threaphy but `is not that bad, but we can do something to help!`

It is parent evening in a few weeks so will speak to his teacher again, but do not hold out too much hope, she says he is strugling with his reading, but has only listerned to him read 2 times since sept! its in his reading diary!

I am trying do more with him at home,but can not force him to do it.

As far as school is concerened, going to leave it to Sept, let him settle in for a few weeks and go see his new teacher. I will then ask what problems he has in school and what they are going to do about it? I will support what they say.

It will soon be the holidays and as I do not work August, I will be able to spend loads of time with him. Going to keep a diary of his outbrusts and see if I can keep a picture, then take it and him to the GP.

thanks again for all the kind words

inmypocketnottheirs

Hmmm, kids! We don't get any training or a manual, do we?!?!

Where's Dad in all of this?

Carmina_Piranha_3

he works the evening shift so he is not there for the time period when the kids are home from school.

crockpot i know what you mean about you can't force them to do it at home. when my nephew was struggling to read he was so tired and emotional after a hard day at school that he didn't want to try any more at home.

i remember helping my little boy in the summer holidays when he was more relaxed, because after school he was shattered and upset.

is he in year 1, or year 2? even so i have the vague notion that teacher should be listening to him read more often! there's paperwork to fill in, i remember filling it in for children in year 3 when i was a parent helper.

my nephew went into a special catch-up programme with the SENCO. he missed lessons to do it, but that didn't bother him because by then the lessons were too hard for him. there were a few different programmes for catching up in literacy or numeracy, with 3-letter acronyms such as ELS. going back to basics and helping him to understand them helped him enormously and he got his confidence back. not all children are paying enough attention or are able to grasp the basics at the time they are taught, and the national curriculum can sometimes go too fast and leave children struggling if they haven't got the hang of the basics. these programmes run by the SENCO were only for 6 children at a time, so that was the ten percent who struggled most.

jess1974

MonkeySaving? wrote: »

Smack his bottom, HARD.

Not very helpful....

Lokolo

jess1974 wrote: »

Not very helpful....

Why not?

I used to get smacked on the bum when I was being naughty and I have turned out just fine.

I recommend this method to. Its been used for years and years by many parents, why stop.

Carmina_Piranha_3

because it's not the best method and there are better ways.

this child is probably incredibly frustrated by his poor performance in school and confused about why he can't learn to read as fast as the other children. while his attacks on his brother are unfair on the brother i feel really sorry for this little boy. stopping the attacks on his brother by fear of violence from his parents isn't going to change the way he feels inside!

fsdss

just picked up on this thread....

am i right in reading that his behaviour is ok in school? - but he is struggling to read (maybe i have got that wrong - but literally, i have just skimmed through) and having speech therapy?.

i run parenting courses for children aged 3-17. one method which works with a 6yr old you might like to try is rather than using a reward chart - try and make (with use of computer) little certificates of praise. these should be small enough to fit into a wallet - and usually you can add a theme (football or perhaps dr who). when your child has done well give them a certificate with lots of praise and let them blue tac it to his wall/ refrigirator. (use with your eldest too - for ignoring the fighting part of behaviour)
when the target amount is raised you can swap these for treats.
i'll pop back later and talk more...got to dash to a birthday party which i forgot about

Sarahsaver

Children with problems do NOT always show the same behaviour in home AND school.
Kids often kick off more at home because they feel safer there than at school. Yes they will be in trouble for being naughty but he clearly feels secure enough that you will still love him after he has temporarily lost the plot.
i know this from my 8 yo. Ds who has had problems since age of 2, and recently got diagnosed with aspergers and ADHD.
If your lad hurts his brother he must apologise and his brother must hear him get told off, for the sake of his brother's own self esteem and sense of fairness. unfairness is one of the worst things for a child to deal with, so whilst its not nice that any child gets physically hurt by a sibling, it is at least possible to minimise the emotional impact.
I slowed down with the reading at home with my DS because he was getting so distressed by it, and i went to have a word with the teacher. i really think they had been quietly measuring him by his siblings, a very bright younger brother who never even has to learn spellings as he just seems to know them all anyway, and a 'gifted and talented' older sister.
I will pop back later if I can.
by the way I do all the dietary stuff too no procesed stuff and so on. i have had countless professionals so called who didnt believe me though, when i tell them i cook from scratch.

Lunar_Eclipse

crockpot wrote: »

My son is 6 and as always been a handful.

Scene setting:

Okay, I wouldn't describe either of my two children (girls aged 6 and 8) as a handful, but they certainly have their moments - with me. They are quiet and extremely well behaved at school and with other people. But we have our nightmare moments often! They are also academically able, ie extension Maths & Literacy.

However my youngest often comes out of school in the same frame of mind as your 6 year old, argumentative, short tempered and generally very unpleasant. I think this is partly due to her excellent behaviour in (strict) school, partly because she is tired and partly because of the time of day (sugar low.)

Could he simply be hungry, dehydrated and tired? It can have a severe affect on behaviour and mood.

My solution which helps enormously is that I take her a snack to the school gates, greet her warmly and immediately swap her school bag/s for the snack (hoping she eats it asap!) I have learnt that this timing is critical. Even the 5 mins to the car isn't worth it! The snack contains a drink (fruit smoothie, juice or squash), fruit, small sandwich/other carb and cheese usually. Sometimes it might be grapes, cheese & crisps/wafer biscuit/rice cakes/homemade muffin etc. And then a healthy cooked meal 2 hours later is a good follow up.

I also try to keep her calm (ie being mindful of our conversation topics) for the first 20 minutes until the food and drink kicks in. It definitely starts off our afternoon time on the right note.

She is a lovely child if she isn't tired or hungry. We've learnt the hard way to feed her every 2 hours max!

And I also think most children come out of school dehydrated (really hot days aside.) How many children have had a large portion of their 8-10 glasses of water needed daily by 3 pm ish? I think my children have had 3 drinks max by then - breakfast, classroom water bottle & lunch time drink. It's nowhere near enough.

HTH x